Is it really normal to date multiple people at the same time?

Watch
Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
I get told to not focus and invest too much in one guy I meet online, and I know he has the right to speak to other girls. But Is this a common thing to do? Like was it also happening before the internet and social media? And is it not a bit painful to know that you are being compared to the other people?

Also, when (after how long/ how many dates) does it become inappropriate to speak to other people/ continue to look on dating apps? I was messaging a guy for almost 2 months and met up once. Then I turned on another app out of curiosity to see If he was on there, and I found him - was pretty painful tbh
0
reply
cleveranimal56
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#2
Report 1 month ago
#2
I think that's called cheating.
0
reply
Celtic Conjurer
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#3
Report 1 month ago
#3
I think you already know that dating multiple people at once isn’t normal or common at all and never has been.
1
reply
Lucifer323
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#4
Report 1 month ago
#4
It is very normal to date a lot of people and having sex with as many as you wish. There is no natural law or moral rule to prevent you from doing so.
1
reply
Lucifer323
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#5
Report 1 month ago
#5
(Original post by Celtic Conjurer)
I think you already know that dating multiple people at once isn’t normal or common at all and never has been.
It's not good in Islam. In the UK it's fine.
0
reply
londonmyst
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#6
Report 1 month ago
#6
Yes.
But it is not normal to organise group dates with multiple people.
Nor dishonestly schedule back to back dates with half a dozen different people in the same night, at the same venue as Justin Schweiger did.
0
reply
Lucifer323
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#7
Report 1 month ago
#7
(Original post by londonmyst)
Yes.
But it is not normal to organise group dates with multiple people.
Nor dishonestly schedule back to back dates with half a dozen different people in the same night, at the same venue as Justin Schweiger did.
What is a group date with multiple people?
0
reply
londonmyst
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#8
Report 1 month ago
#8
(Original post by Lucifer323)
What is a group date with multiple people?
One person attempting to run their own budget version of a speed dating event or swingers club event.
0
reply
Lucifer323
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#9
Report 1 month ago
#9
(Original post by londonmyst)
One person attempting to run their own budget version of a speed dating event or swingers club event.
I see. But I don't know how this can happen.
0
reply
Zarek
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#10
Report 1 month ago
#10
It’s probably pretty normal to be going on multiple dates, weighing up who you like best, keeping others on back burner and generally treating people like you wouldn’t want to be treated yourself. I suspect guys suffer most. This is the main reason why internet dating is terrible.
1
reply
Lucifer323
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#11
Report 1 month ago
#11
(Original post by Zarek)
It’s probably pretty normal to be going on multiple dates, weighing up who you like best, keeping others on back burner and generally treating people like you wouldn’t want to be treated yourself. I suspect guys suffer most. This is the main reason why internet dating is terrible.
Only stupids do internet dating.
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#12
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#12
(Original post by Lucifer323)
Only stupids do internet dating.
Oi don't call me stupid haha. Its the only way I can speak to /meet guys - I have no social life so highly unlikely I'll meet anyone at a party/ through a friend etc. I've tried 2 apps but I've now pretty much given up.
0
reply
Bang Outta Order
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#13
Report 1 month ago
#13
Yes, date.


Relationship. No.


Dating is just dating...planned eat and greets with a friend or romantic interest. The problem here is people take first dates further...and bring sex in right away, and think sex means relationship, thus complicating what dating is. However if you wanna date and **** multiple people, have at it. Not my lifestyle. But you're ****ing entitled.
1
reply
Lucifer323
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#14
Report 1 month ago
#14
(Original post by Anonymous)
Oi don't call me stupid haha. Its the only way I can speak to /meet guys - I have no social life so highly unlikely I'll meet anyone at a party/ through a friend etc. I've tried 2 apps but I've now pretty much given up.
My comment was sarcastic...
Although internet dating is not the best way to meet others. And in principle, with dating you can't really learn anything about the other person. You can only get first impressions. But first impressions are most times deceiving.
0
reply
chlamydia9000
Badges: 15
Rep:
?
#15
Report 1 month ago
#15
It seems to be normal based on American sitcoms and SATC. This seems to have seeped in to our culture. I've only met a few women who do this. They seemed to be grade A slegs. Multi-dating isn't something I tolerate. Too much of an STD risk/too risky of an investment.

If you've asked them if you're 'going out' and they've said yes, then they shouldn't still be on dating apps/seeing others. Two months is enough time to make up your mind.
0
reply
Katya_93
Badges: 15
Rep:
?
#16
Report 1 month ago
#16
I wouldn't do it and I wouldn't tolerate a man doing it to me.
In my opinion, If you're only talking, or having a laugh in a friendly way, it's fine to do talk to multiple people. But as soon as the relationship goes into the dating /serious talk category there shouldn't be more than one person.

I don't blame you for being hurt. I probably would be aswell.
0
reply
YaliaV123
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#17
Report 1 month ago
#17
I think it’s more of an American thing.
1
reply
ashtolga23
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#18
Report 1 month ago
#18
(Original post by Lucifer323)
It's not good in Islam. In the UK it's fine.
My favourite country: Islam.
4
reply
Nautilus
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#19
Report 1 month ago
#19
(Original post by Lucifer323)
It is very normal to date a lot of people and having sex with as many as you wish. There is no natural law or moral rule to prevent you from doing so.
It's a *****y thing to do IMO.
0
reply
EU Yakov
Badges: 15
Rep:
?
#20
Report 1 month ago
#20
distinction needed. dating other ppl when you have just 1 or 2 dates with someone = probably okay, esp if it's all casual to date. dating other ppl when you have spent 2 months with someone and slept with them and spend a lot of time talking and hanging with them = not okay

i think the best approach is to speak about when you and the other person stop seeing other ppl. it can be brought up casually and it's not a massive "ermagawd we're in a relationship now???" thing. but yeah if someone hasnt spoken to you about it and is then popping up on dating apps and sleeping around thats such a red flag. it's insensitive and risky and shows a complete lack of regard for your feelings. you're being misled and used as a backup. kinda ****ed.
1
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Should the school day be extended to help students catch up?

Yes (96)
27.51%
No (253)
72.49%

Watched Threads

View All