Is it really normal to date multiple people at the same time?

My favourite country: Islam.

There is a difference between having a relationship with someone, and the talking phase...
The latter is normal and fine to talk to multiple guys in. The former is cheating.

I think it’s more of an American thing.

tbh i think op is referring to the bit in the middle where you've spent a lot of time on the other person and feelings have grown but you're not official yet. so like the 1-3 month mark where it's still "dating" not talking or relationship

At that point if they plan to be in a relationship with the individual, there is no reason for them to continue talking to other guys so they should stop.

Not really! We do it also here in the UK and in the rest of Europe. Maybe in other places too like Russia for example...

But the way, good evening Ms Yalia!

Hello Mrs…Mr L. I’ve never been to Russia, so I’ll have to take your word for that. Where are you from originally again?

There is an ethical way to practice polyamory. The partners should be aware of eachother and generally be in on the situation. If you are literally in a relationship with multiple people at the same time with each under the impression you're exclusive that's just cheating.

"Dating" is more of a grey area, (I usually think dating = in a relationship but I guess you mean the non-exclusive part at the beginning) you've kind of just got to use common sense when it's taking the piss. I would personally only focus on one person even when just "talking"...

it was the other bloke who was talking to women
bizarrely while i get what op is asking about i actually dont think that she is that far into dating. meeting up once isn't much and texting is just that. i don't blame the bloke for messaging other women even though i would have also been hurt by it if i was in the op's shoes. op should've done more to communicate and clarify where the dating was going.

I get told to not focus and invest too much in one guy I meet online, and I know he has the right to speak to other girls. But Is this a common thing to do? Like was it also happening before the internet and social media? And is it not a bit painful to know that you are being compared to the other people?

Also, when (after how long/ how many dates) does it become inappropriate to speak to other people/ continue to look on dating apps? I was messaging a guy for almost 2 months and met up once. Then I turned on another app out of curiosity to see If he was on there, and I found him - was pretty painful tbh

Yeah meeting up once definitely isn't proper 'dating' and I 100% regret neither of us mentioning exactly what we are looking for... but then again sometimes its difficult to know where you think it may go - it depends on the person. I may like them but just not in a romantic way/ need time to figure out my feelings. So then I would hesitate to tell him that I'm looking for a serious relationship as I wouldn't want to later let them down

It was just hurtful because I thought he was a decent guy. and he didn't seem as keen as me to meet up, partly blaming it on covid. But then his profile in the app that he must have set up recently mentions sex... so obviously he's not afraid of catching anything... Then he also put down the company name in his profile but he actually works at a different company. Baffles me as to why he'd put down a different name rather than just not mentioning the company at all...
Anyway I passively aggressively called him out for not texting over the weekend. I also said he must have had a good weekend (because he was probably chatting to other girls on tinder). Since my message he's blocked me LOL

Personally I would only date one person and show interest in one person at a time, just because mass dating is not for me. However, I have close friends who mass date and sleep with like 3 different people within a week (this was before covid). They look at dating in a way where it is ok to date an unlimited amount of people but, when you are on like the third or fourth date with someone and you start establishing that you are both super into each other and you would like to date exclusively, only then would you cut the contact with other potential dates.

well that ends that. don't forget that the lesson of this story will stay with you forever. also covid put everyone in a difficult position. i think that in normal circs the situation would have been clarified a lot more quickly.

btw the guy blocking you without saying a word is super immature, ghosting/blocking and the like reek of cowardice and of people being afraid to stand up and explain themselves.


tbf this is probably a more balanced approach. also depends on how easily ppl go on dates. a coffee date can be arranged with anyone and doesn't mean ****. a full on fancy night date with sex after means a little more. i know women who would point blank refuse casual dates and would insist on serious dates because they thought it would be a way to filter out ****boys and cheapskates who want to jump from one woman to the other