Very confused in what I’m doing at the moment, need help

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Anonymousguy775
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I’m at college at the moment studying A A Levels (Maths, Chemistry and Psychology.) I’m so confused at the moment and really need to hear from some people because we’re coming to the end of the year now and I just don’t know what to do. I’m doing Year 12 again with different subjects (I was at a Sixth form last year doing English Lang/Lit, Psychology And Criminology.) I wasn’t really enjoying those subjects and was having a bad experience at that sixth form so I decided to leave there and do these new subjects at this college where things were a bit better. Unfortunately, I’ve just gotten myself into another mess now and I’m contemplating whether to even continue on with A levels at this point. I’m having big issues with Chemistry and just regret picking it. Back in September when I enrolled at this college, all I thought about is how good I was at chemistry in GCSE and that I’d be able to handle it but I was totally wrong. I also had this whole phenomenon about going into chemical or biomedical engineering at the time or even studying medicine (basically any profession that related to chemistry) but I completely rethought that now after seeing what chemistry really is about. I don’t even know why I was so ambitious to go into those professions at the time. A Level Chemistry is something else, it’s nothing like GCSE Chemistry at all.

I’ll talk a bit about my situation in chemistry at the moment. I absolutely dread the subject and have zero motivation to revise or go over any notes. Every time I study, I always either go over Maths or Psychology, but never Chemistry. I absolutely dread the lessons too and don’t even know why I’m there half the time. I’ve even been intentionally missing lessons some days just because of how much I don’t want to be there and still can’t be bothered to go over the lesson I missed. Whenever I’m actually in the class, I simply can’t comprehend or begin to do the work because of how far behind I am in Chemistry (I’m so far behind), so I literally just sit there for an hour and a half on my phone, or trying to pretend to do work when my teacher is around. Practicals are the worst because that’s when I have absolutely no idea of what I’m doing and things get really awkward and embarrassing. I’m aware that everyone can see that I don’t know what I’m doing which really embarrasses me. When me and my partner were doing a practical together last lesson, I dropped a beaker we were using and the solution we had all spilled on the floor. My partner had to go to another group and I was left on my own; it was really embarrassing. I really don’t know what I’m doing in Chemistry anymore because there’s no way I can continue it next year. My teacher doesn’t seem to give a monkeys about me either because she’s not doing anything to help me sit with the head of department and discuss things with him. All she just says is ‘get on with it, try and copy even if you don’t understand anything’ but what kind of crappy advice is that for someone who doesn’t even want to be in the classroom.

You see, my situation is very conflicting because I actually enjoy my other two subjects, Maths and Psychology. I enjoy them so much more and I’m much better in them compared to chemistry. I also actually see myself going down a route more related to those subjects. However what is terrible is the head of department of Chemistry said that I can’t drop Chemistry and continue with two a levels. This is a big shame as I enjoy Maths and Psychology, am doing decent in them and want to continue them onto the second year. It looks like I may not even be able to do this as I’m being told I can’t drop chemistry which has led me to completely contemplate on the whole idea of A levels altogether.

I don’t even know how to begin to raise this all with my family as none of them are aware of any of these issues that I’m having with chemistry. They are under the assumption that everything’s fine, which is not the case. I don’t even know if they’ll understand me and how they’ll even react. And it’s always quite hard to flag up something you should’ve a while back later on down the line and break the ice, which is why I’m really hesitant to do so. It’s all really conflicting because at the same time, I do seek my family’s counsel about my next steps and what I should do from here as they know me better than anyone does. Because I’m still struggling to speak with them, I wanted to at least post my situation on here so some of you guys could perhaps give me some advice on what I should do now and what my next steps should be. I also feel quite bad about myself and the fact that I’m in this very situation.
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musicalmedic3
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Could you not talk to the head of the college about dropping chemistry and continuing on with the others? I'm not sure why the chemistry head is refusing this, but perhaps escalating it will show how important this is to you, and the head of year/ college may be more understanding? Are there any other subjects you could switch to- doing a year of English language could have given you quite a bit of experience and you might be able to pick it up again quite easily? I understand that you dropped it because you didn't enjoy it, but it seems like you're having a very hard time with chemistry and if you think English was easier for you maybe you could revert.
Just as a side note, if you did well as GCSE chemistry there's no reason why you can't do well at A-level- at the start of year 12 I was the same, I absolutely hated it and found it impossibly hard, but once you start to learn more and more topics you might find it easier and your grade could vastly improve- that's what happened with me.
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Anonymousguy775
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The thing is, I did speak with my form tutor about the issues I’ve been having with chemistry and she raised it with the head of department, only for him to tell us that I have to somehow stick with chemistry and won’t be able to drop it. Again, he is just giving me that same unpractical advice that my teacher was giving me and was saying you need to just stick it out with the subject. What’s that gonna do for someone who no longer even wishes to continue the subject. I mean me and my family are gonna meet with my Chemistry teacher anyway, so maybe we can try and talk it out then and I guess my family will be informed of my situation from there.

(Original post by musicalmedic3)
Could you not talk to the head of the college about dropping chemistry and continuing on with the others? I'm not sure why the chemistry head is refusing this, but perhaps escalating it will show how important this is to you, and the head of year/ college may be more understanding? Are there any other subjects you could switch to- doing a year of English language could have given you quite a bit of experience and you might be able to pick it up again quite easily? I understand that you dropped it because you didn't enjoy it, but it seems like you're having a very hard time with chemistry and if you think English was easier for you maybe you could revert.
Just as a side note, if you did well as GCSE chemistry there's no reason why you can't do well at A-level- at the start of year 12 I was the same, I absolutely hated it and found it impossibly hard, but once you start to learn more and more topics you might find it easier and your grade could vastly improve- that's what happened with me.
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