Girlfriend told me she wants to break up in September for uni

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Anonymous #1
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I'm crushed my girlfriend told me earlier today she wants to break up when she goes to uni and openly said she needs to see other people as we are each other's firsts. She says she wants to make the most of the time we have left and wants to stay together until she goes to uni, she's given no hint of this at all until she told me today yet confusing me more is that we still went back to her house and had sex. Any advice on what I should do? Can I persuade her to change her mind and give it a go?
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm crushed my girlfriend told me earlier today she wants to break up when she goes to uni and openly said she needs to see other people as we are each other's firsts. She says she wants to make the most of the time we have left and wants to stay together until she goes to uni, she's given no hint of this at all until she told me today yet confusing me more is that we still went back to her house and had sex. Any advice on what I should do? Can I persuade her to change her mind and give it a go?
break up with her now and get a head start. Long distance is hard and will only work if both actually want it to work, she doesn't want it to work and in fact, whilst i understand why she's said that, her saying it is quite disrespectful to you. Do yourself a favour and dump her. If you can't do that then cheat on her, now that your relationship has a fixed end date that she's openly brought up its lost all meaning.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
break up with her now and get a head start. Long distance is hard and will only work if both actually want it to work, she doesn't want it to work and in fact, whilst i understand why she's said that, her saying it is quite disrespectful to you. Do yourself a favour and dump her. If you can't do that then cheat on her, now that your relationship has a fixed end date that she's openly brought up its lost all meaning.
I actually messaged her saying why can't we give it a go and she said she would feel trapped and wants to be free and single when she goes off to uni yet she wants us to be a couple until she goes
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Zarek
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Realistically few relationships survive going to uni so there could be some logic. From what I saw with friends who broke up during the first terms it was painful. Maybe there is a way to bank some good times.
Last edited by Zarek; 4 weeks ago
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Zarek)
Realistically few relationships survive going to uni so there could be some logic. From I saw with friends who broke up during the first terms it was painful. Maybe there is a way to bank some good times.
What hurts me a few weeks ago she said I was her world and she never wanted to leave me I don't get why she's suddenly changed
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Ram Ranch
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Just start shagging other girls on the side and let her go in Sept. You can bang her when she comes home like a sidepiece during the hols.
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Anonymous #3
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Shes a *****, how can she say she's your world and a few weeks later want to dump you. You deserve better bro and hopefully university doesn't work out for her
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Zarek
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(Original post by Anonymous)
What hurts me a few weeks ago she said I was her world and she never wanted to leave me I don't get why she's suddenly changed
I know this is very tough. It does seem to be a common trait with girls that they have sudden changes of heart that they barely understand themselves. An ex I really liked dumped me and still handed over an xmas present with a tag saying ‘love always’, it had been written a few days before. It took me a while to feel philosophical about this. Hope things work out ok.
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Creativesilence
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**** her she aint worth it like people who are truly in love with u will make long distance work yes i would admit it would be hard but her wanting to be free and single shows alot about this relationship and herself but trust me never go by words always go by the actions of the person shes clearly using u before she goes uni
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PhoenixFortune
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm crushed my girlfriend told me earlier today she wants to break up when she goes to uni and openly said she needs to see other people as we are each other's firsts. She says she wants to make the most of the time we have left and wants to stay together until she goes to uni, she's given no hint of this at all until she told me today yet confusing me more is that we still went back to her house and had sex. Any advice on what I should do? Can I persuade her to change her mind and give it a go?
A friend of mine went through something similar. Her boyfriend of 3 years asked to talk privately when they were in their last few weeks of sixth form; she thought he wanted to discuss how long distance would work, only for him to suggest breaking up so they could both be 'free' for uni. It's really tough when your partner isn't on the same page as you, and she was pretty blindsided by it.

While you are young, some people get hung up on staying with their first partner through big life changes. If she's made up her mind to split up with you, there's no point trying to persuade her to keep the relationship going when her heart isn't in it. Accept her decision (even if it seems unfair now, she's probably doing you a favour), and make a clean break.
Last edited by PhoenixFortune; 4 weeks ago
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Anonymous #4
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I actually messaged her saying why can't we give it a go and she said she would feel trapped and wants to be free and single when she goes off to uni yet she wants us to be a couple until she goes
She’s just using you until she goes to uni. Don’t be that guy. Just break up. Srsly she sounds mad disrespectful. If she rlly loved u she wouldn’t have even mentioned breaking up in the first place bro. Do better bro dump her. That’s the right move.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
She’s just using you until she goes to uni. Don’t be that guy. Just break up. Srsly she sounds mad disrespectful. If she rlly loved u she wouldn’t have even mentioned breaking up in the first place bro. Do better bro dump her. That’s the right move.
I just messaged her saying it's over and she says I'm being immature and childish
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hamz.at
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm crushed my girlfriend told me earlier today she wants to break up when she goes to uni and openly said she needs to see other people as we are each other's firsts. She says she wants to make the most of the time we have left and wants to stay together until she goes to uni, she's given no hint of this at all until she told me today yet confusing me more is that we still went back to her house and had sex. Any advice on what I should do? Can I persuade her to change her mind and give it a go?
pff she broke up with you so her coochie is free for the men in her dorm.:rofl3:
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Anonymous #5
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I just messaged her saying it's over and she says I'm being immature and childish
You made the right decision. You’ll look back on this moment and laugh
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
You made the right decision. You’ll look back on this moment and laugh
Now she's pleading me not to break up with her yet wtf
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Anonymous #4
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Now she's pleading me not to break up with her yet wtf
The fact that she even suggested you breaking up for such a stupid reason shows how much u mean to her. Honestly unless this is some joke you need to just stay far away. She basically wasting ur time.
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Anonymous #6
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Now she's pleading me not to break up with her yet wtf
Break up with her if she didn't want it to happen she shouldn't have said it.
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ThatOldGuy
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm crushed my girlfriend told me earlier today she wants to break up when she goes to uni and openly said she needs to see other people as we are each other's firsts. She says she wants to make the most of the time we have left and wants to stay together until she goes to uni, she's given no hint of this at all until she told me today yet confusing me more is that we still went back to her house and had sex. Any advice on what I should do? Can I persuade her to change her mind and give it a go?
You can persuade her to change her mind, but not by trying to.

Break up with her now. Say, "Honestly, if I'm your second choice, then we really shouldn't be together until September. I'm not mad. Go nuts. You're free, now." and leave. One of two things will happen:

1) She will cry and ask you back. Don't go back. Not until she's at University. If you do, she will break up with you around November-time at the latest.

2) She will let you go, secretly feeling relief. In that case, you dodged a bullet, man.

Either way, you'll garner way more interest from her than if you cry and beg and plead her to stay and use guilt. If you use guilt, she will associate you with feeling bad and you will one hundred percent lose her. If you walk away, she'll still remember the good times and may want you back.

Either way, go date other people.
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PhoenixFortune
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Now she's pleading me not to break up with her yet wtf
Sounds like she wants to be the one to do the dumping, and doesn't like that you took that authority away from her.
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Anonymous #7
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so she wants summer with a boyfriend then a clean break for uni to be free? how incredibly convenient for her?

the way she worded it seems very selfish and it seems like she's gearing up for a mad time at uni.

how long have u been together?
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