Mum refusing to help me

She stays in bed all day, refuses to get out and I have has to her takeaways and go to the shop everyday. I have to do all the work like do the washing and even bring her food up to her like im the parent and I am getting sick of not getting any help. She said a few weeks ago if I dont want to be here then leave so I did and she started crying pressuring me to come back so I had to. My dad is has work and stuff because he's trying to earn a living. I spoke to my uncle about her not getting out of bed, he agreed that its bad, he told me when he was my age his mum used to look after him still until he moved out and even then they helped if he needed it. My mum refuses to help me.

The thing that's stupid is some mornings she shouts across from her room to my room for me to get up and have breakfast yet she's still in bed herself and doesn't get up. When she does get up she causes arguments like its probably better for her to stay in bed but I'm just sick of being the servant of the house. I'm sick of my mum not supporting me as well like she doesn't support me or my siblings with things I do and she's never proud of me which is kind of upsetting. My dad told me that he's being honest and it is the truth tbh, basically she doesn't care about accomplishments or anything like that

Reply 1

5hyl33n

Volunteer Team, Clearing and Applications Advisor

21

Original post by Anonymous

She stays in bed all day, refuses to get out and I have has to her takeaways and go to the shop everyday. I have to do all the work like do the washing and even bring her food up to her like im the parent and I am getting sick of not getting any help. She said a few weeks ago if I dont want to be here then leave so I did and she started crying pressuring me to come back so I had to. My dad is has work and stuff because he's trying to earn a living. I spoke to my uncle about her not getting out of bed, he agreed that its bad, he told me when he was my age his mum used to look after him still until he moved out and even then they helped if he needed it. My mum refuses to help me.

The thing that's stupid is some mornings she shouts across from her room to my room for me to get up and have breakfast yet she's still in bed herself and doesn't get up. When she does get up she causes arguments like its probably better for her to stay in bed but I'm just sick of being the servant of the house. I'm sick of my mum not supporting me as well like she doesn't support me or my siblings with things I do and she's never proud of me which is kind of upsetting. My dad told me that he's being honest and it is the truth tbh, basically she doesn't care about accomplishments or anything like that

Stop doing it then. When she doesn’t get food or whatever she wants, then she will have to get up and get it herself.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by 5hyl33n

Stop doing it then. When she doesn’t get food or whatever she wants, then she will have to get up and get it herself.

Then it causes arguments and she keeps shouting until I bring stuff up

Reply 3

Surnia

20

How old are you?

Discuss it with your dad and get a doctor to the house, in case it's a mental or physical health problem.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Surnia

How old are you?

Discuss it with your dad and get a doctor to the house, in case it's a mental or physical health problem.

21

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

I think it's just pure laziness Surnia mate. She's not got anything physically or mentally wrong

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

Bump

Reply 7

Chinalouise

Original post by Anonymous

Then it causes arguments and she keeps shouting until I bring stuff up

Sounds like a really tense situation for you and I’m sorry to hear about it. I know you’ll do what she wants to avoid the arguments and the shouting, but I can’t see things improving unless you go through that. Ultimately arguments are based around a difference of opinion, and I’m quite sure the majority of people would take your side. I think you need to put your foot down OP - either force her to get out of bed and look after herself by ignoring her demands, or leave. I know you say the last time you left she cried for you to come back but you deserve better than this, and you need to be on your own team.

Reply 8

londonmyst

19

Move out, don't visit her and ignore all her phone calls/messages/attempts to get you to return to serve her.
Let her decide if she wants to laze around in bed all day alone, hungry and without any audience.

I'm guessing that with 5 weeks she will have either pulled her act together or got your father and siblings so annoyed that they will have made clear to her that they won't be obeying her demands or doing much to oblige her.
Good luck!

Reply 9