saturday 26 june 2021
happy update number five! and welcome to my summer holiday lack of productivity since yesterday was the last day of year 11 for me! I know so many year 11s have been off for about a month now but we have been in school still completing what they have referred to as enriching activities, or ncs and school trips. I didn't end up going in for the rest of ncs last week, but I still somehow got a certificate for it? anyway in the last week, we've only had half days of school, and supposed virtual learning in the afternoons which did not really include anything since it was the same stuff that we were set before half term with taster work for each subject, excluding, somehow, the five that I'm doing. I mean how difficult is it to provide for at least ONE of them??
anyway, this week, on monday, I had a hospital appointment so I wasn't in, but it did go well and I got new medication so I hope that'll help. tuesday, we had pshe sessions about drugs and how to do them safely, I would've thought they'd have discouraged it a little more but oops. wednesday, we went to Alton Towers which was pretty fun, but a 3 hour journey each way so I was absolutely tired of it, my group left me with two girls who didn't want to go on any rides and we had to stay in groups of three so we went on a lot of the little rides but I had to try and convince them for about an hour before they'd go on rita, the smiler, or even some of the family rides. lots were closed and others broke down so overall a bit disappointing but it was a pretty good day nonetheless. thursday, we had a motivational speaker come in and he actually made me reconsider my motives behind what i'd like to do and the fact in the end, it's about your enjoyment and not your attainment, and what will you look back on when you're 80? as someone who has struggled with their mental health, I hadn't really considered this before since I had just assumed I wouldn't be there, my life plan was simply bullet points to tick off, when really I should be enjoying the journey too. then on friday, we did an accredited first aid course, handy, since the one I'd earned at cadets had just run out, but also a little bittersweet since it didn't feel like an ending? this was the last time I would speak to some of these people (some of which, I'm so glad it is, and others that I will miss profusely) and yet a brief hug and a, "maybe I'll see you on results day?" was all that happened to indicate that this was the end of something. year 11 doesn't feel like it is anywhere near over since we didn't really all have a final exam or even a celebration assembly or prom (not that I was going, but it was cancelled) and it just felt like it should be, bigger? I guess?
so at the start of this thread, I seemed to be quite productive, and planned to do an hour of seneca per day before I went back to school, totalling to 95 hours from that point onwards. I can now confirm that there are only 67 days until I go back to school (which once again feels wrong, I know it's ten weeks but this summer felt like it should be so much longer?) and no more than maybe 5 hours were completed... so I think I'm going to set some slightly more realistic daily goals so I have some kind of plan for the summer as a whole so I do not waste it on sleeping and watching anything with keeley hawes in it on netflix (really, do I EVER shut up about keeley? I'm so sorry) as I have today, it's 2pm and I've watched 'honour,' which has her in, and napped so, productivity? I also spoke about the EPQ, for which I have also made no progress or researched anything at all, but I did have another appointment in regard to my diagnosis where they simply tried to say I was more likely to have anxiety than be autistic, so, my topic remains ever topical, I really don't need social stories or to be pushed further into yet another waiting list despite the fact they haven't even met me in person yet... I've had about a month's "rest" since the end of my exams now, so I do need to start working again.
in regard to law, I think I'm starting the course next week, but for sociology, politics and tech, I really need to lay out a plan of what I need to do over the summer, I might email my tech teacher to see what he suggests focussing on, but I don't know who my teachers will be for the other subjects so I'll just focus on the seneca and prep work I've stolen from other school's websites so that I'm even slightly on track, I don't really know how much work anyone else is planning on doing over the summer? please do let me know, I don't really want to burn myself out or anything, but I am terrified of falling behind again. as I said, my attendance will beat my final 48% for year 11, but I really don't know how the pain will be treating me then and I just do not want a repeat of the last year at all, it's been HELL. anyway I was going to try and set out a daily to-do list, vague schedule to stick to so that Productivity is somewhat maintained (if you can say that, I haven't really had productivity to maintain) so I shall make that. I think the hour of seneca is a pretty good and achievable goal, that I could maybe do when I wake up in the morning? my alarm is set for 9am, so maybe 9-10am would be a perfect time for it, alongside my 10 minutes of danish duolingo that I really have not kept up with since I lost my streak in hospital last year, and my mum has somehow REALLY overtaken me with xp, she joined a year ago and has a 365 day streak, I joined in 2013 and I really haven't done any in months, but hopefully I shall stick to it this time if I can build it into my currently non-existent routine! anyway, daily, I think:
- 10 mins of danish on duolingo
though I feel the 20 mins of seneca could be upped to 30 for each subject, that's attainable too, really, isn't it? and would mean that over the next 65 days, let's say, that would be 97.5, beating my original goal, which is perfect
- 90 mins of seneca (30 for economics/sociology/politics)
I'll also try and take at least a page of notes for law a day I think, so I'm going to set some alarms to try and maintain the routine, which may be turned off within a week but we shall see.
the rest of today's plan is just to maybe chill and play some games, watch fresh meat on netflix (recently watched feel good and fell in love with charlotte ritchie) and then try and get some seneca and duolingo done to get the goals started. also to set up a digital planner that works for me I think that is also necessary. I think this is my longest update and I'm not sure why, I think I rambled quite a bit, but it's fine... I shall shut up now, but I hope you're all having a lovely week, and if you aren't, I'm always here!
to-do list
[ ] once again literally nothing
[ ] but also the daily tasks listed above
[ ] digital planner set up
[ ] duolingo
[ ] seneca
saffron <3