English language, could anyone read thru my answer?

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thrivingfrog
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Heyyy, I have my English language mock tomorrow and I'm doing practice questions now. Ik it's v short notice so I'm not expecting anyone to be able to but would anyone be willing to read thru some answers and give me some tips??
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banannabelle17
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(Original post by melissa223)
Heyyy, I have my English language mock tomorrow and I'm doing practice questions now. Ik it's v short notice so I'm not expecting anyone to be able to but would anyone be willing to read thru some answers and give me some tips??
yep
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thrivingfrog
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(Original post by banannabelle17)
yep
tysm, I just did a q2 within the time limit thing and I've hardly done that before so it might be really bad but I'll send it now and tysm
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thrivingfrog
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In the extract, the writer uses violent and satanic imagery to describe Lucy as evil and monstrous. Her eyes are repeatedly described in a disturbing way, 'unclean and full of hell fire'. The adjective 'unclean' suggests that Lucy, once pure and innocent is now evil and a sinner. 'Hell fire' suggests a satanic side to her with 'hell' having connotations of Satan/the devil, and that she is now full of rage and villainy. This quotation juxtaposes the previous description of her eyes as 'pure gentle orbs', implying that Lucy is a completely different person to the loving woman she once was.

The writer also uses language to describe Lucy as inhumane. For example, she is described to be 'growling over it (a baby) as a dog growls over a bone'. This simile compares Lucy to a violent, bloodthirsty animal and not the human she once was. This is further reinforced by the description of how she has a child 'clutched strenuously to her breast'. 'Strenuously' suggests that Lucy gas been stripped of her feminine qualities such as mothering and caring and is now animal-like and violent instead. Thirdly, the writer describes Lucy as 'the thing' implying that she is uncomparable to anything seen before and so different to her usual self thar she is unidentifiable.
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banannabelle17
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(Original post by melissa223)
In the extract, the writer uses violent and satanic imagery to describe Lucy as evil and monstrous. Her eyes are repeatedly described in a disturbing way, 'unclean and full of hell fire'. The adjective 'unclean' suggests that Lucy, once pure and innocent is now evil and a sinner. 'Hell fire' suggests a satanic side to her with 'hell' having connotations of Satan/the devil, and that she is now full of rage and villainy. This quotation juxtaposes the previous description of her eyes as 'pure gentle orbs', implying that Lucy is a completely different person to the loving woman she once was.

The writer also uses language to describe Lucy as inhumane. For example, she is described to be 'growling over it (a baby) as a dog growls over a bone'. This simile compares Lucy to a violent, bloodthirsty animal and not the human she once was. This is further reinforced by the description of how she has a child 'clutched strenuously to her breast'. 'Strenuously' suggests that Lucy gas been stripped of her feminine qualities such as mothering and caring and is now animal-like and violent instead. Thirdly, the writer describes Lucy as 'the thing' implying that she is uncomparable to anything seen before and so different to her usual self thar she is unidentifiable.
For timed conditions, this is quite good!
1) Why does Lucy being "unclean" suggest that she is evil and a sinner? You could talk about metaphorical uncleanliness which suggests sin.
2) I feel like you're getting the "rage" bit from the "fire," make sure you add that in there. You could continue to talk about that, how fire is chaotic and destructive, whereas "pure, gentle orbs" seem very tame and peaceful.
3) linking to 2) make sure you analyse what you are comparing it to— why is it that "pure, gentle orbs" is so different to "unclean and hell fire"
4) I'm not sure what the text is, but maybe make a wider connection to the text if you can? Why is it so important that Lucy has changed so drastically?
5)You could have mentioned how as well as her being described as a "dog", the baby, in her eyes is the "bone," which connotes death, whereas baby's connote life— again, I haven't read the text, but if this is relevant, then it may be a good point.
6) I like the point you make about her being stripped of her "feminine qualities"— it is very harsh and contrasts with expected motherly qualities.
7) Again, link to wider text if possible? What does it mean that she is "the thing?"

I haven't done English Lang in a while, but as I said, for a first attempt in timed conditions, it seems quite good. Just make sure to be really specific, and you don't have to find so many things to analyse! if you can analyse a few things in quite a bit of detail, and have original thoughts about them, you will get much further than by analysing lots!
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