Muslim roommate and how to make them comfortable

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Anonymous #1
#1
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Hi! In September I'll be moving into a five person flat for uni and one of my roommates is a Muslim. I'm non religious and want to be as accomodating as possible / avoid making her uncomfortable in any way but I'm a bit uneducated about Islam. I am trying to research and will ask them later on but for now does anyone have any tips? I understand they can't have pork or alcohol but can it be in the fridge? Thanks! x
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Anonymous #2
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I suggest putting the non-halal stuff at the bottom or the top and let her have the other section to herself. Try not to make her feel excluded. She might need some 'private' time to pray and do things like that. Don't make her think that you guys are changing just because of her because then she might feel guilty.
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Anonymous #3
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi! In September I'll be moving into a five person flat for uni and one of my roommates is a Muslim. I'm non religious and want to be as accomodating as possible / avoid making her uncomfortable in any way but I'm a bit uneducated about Islam. I am trying to research and will ask them later on but for now does anyone have any tips? I understand they can't have pork or alcohol but can it be in the fridge? Thanks! x
i’ve heard some bad experiences of muslims living with non muslim flatmates where the main thing they stated was they’re completely always be excluded because they didn’t do what their flatmates did such as going out for drinks. i’d suggest if you wanna bond with all your housemates, there should be outings planned where you can all take part. for the most part though, just treat her normally and not make it awkward by trying to accommodate them too much
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Final Fantasy
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Just treat her like any other person. If she has any issues then she will raise them with you. This is the same for any person, you don't just go around treating differently based off assumptions.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Final Fantasy)
Just treat her like any other person. If she has any issues then she will raise them with you. This is the same for any person, you don't just go around treating differently based off assumptions.
From someone who's been in the same situation, we usually don't raise issues because we don't want to make others feel guilty. I agree with not treating her differently, but you should also check some things with her before (even then she might sometimes say she doesn't mind when she actually does) like if it's okay to drink around her etc.
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Final Fantasy
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(Original post by Anonymous)
From someone who's been in the same situation, we usually don't raise issues because we don't want to make others feel guilty. I agree with not treating her differently, but you should also check some things with her before (even then she might sometimes say she doesn't mind when she actually does) like if it's okay to drink around her etc.
I've been around people who drink, it's university - everyone is gonna be drinking. I would not expect everyone to change their behaviour for me. Deal with it.
Last edited by Final Fantasy; 1 month ago
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Anonymous #1
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Thanks for all the advice! Won't try to make it weird and just wanted to be appropriate ahah. Thanks everyone x
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Trinculo
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What the hell is this? It's not for you to make them comfortable. They're not disabled. I think a grown adult can deal with living in a normal house with normal people.

What, did you think Muslims need like a special shower rails or stairlifts or something? Kinda bigoted of you.
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Anonymous #4
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(Original post by Trinculo)
What the hell is this? It's not for you to make them comfortable. They're not disabled. I think a grown adult can deal with living in a normal house with normal people.

What, did you think Muslims need like a special shower rails or stairlifts or something? Kinda bigoted of you.
well clearly shes thoughtful and helpful why r u so offended
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Trinculo
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(Original post by Anonymous)
well clearly shes thoughtful and helpful why r u so offended
What makes you think I'm offended? I'm the one who isn't running in fear of causing offence.

Don't you think it's kind of patronising to try and make reasonable adjustments to someone on the basis of their religion? That's what you do for blind people.
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Anonymous #4
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(Original post by Trinculo)
What makes you think I'm offended? I'm the one who isn't running in fear of causing offence.

Don't you think it's kind of patronising to try and make reasonable adjustments to someone on the basis of their religion? That's what you do for blind people.
its a general term used i dont mean it literally

also u cant just call someone whos trying to help bigoted
and no i dont think its patronising its acc quite thoughtful
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Anonymous #5
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(Original post by Trinculo)
What makes you think I'm offended? I'm the one who isn't running in fear of causing offence.

Don't you think it's kind of patronising to try and make reasonable adjustments to someone on the basis of their religion? That's what you do for blind people.
as a muslim who has lived with non-muslims for 2 years of uni, i really appreciate this kind person taking their time out to consider her flatmate. My flatmates would leave alcohol cans/bottles everywhere, leave open pork/bacon in the fridge and even on counters despite knowing i was muslim but i never said anything
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becausethenight
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#13
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi! In September I'll be moving into a five person flat for uni and one of my roommates is a Muslim. I'm non religious and want to be as accomodating as possible / avoid making her uncomfortable in any way but I'm a bit uneducated about Islam. I am trying to research and will ask them later on but for now does anyone have any tips? I understand they can't have pork or alcohol but can it be in the fridge? Thanks! x
I'd speak to her about it when you get to uni and what she is or isn't comfortable with.

Muslims aren't monolithic and she will have her preferences depending on how devout she is. If she says she's fine with pork in the fridge, for example, or does drink alcohol, just assume she knows what she wants!
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Anonymous #4
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(Original post by Anonymous)
as a muslim who has lived with non-muslims for 2 years of uni, i really appreciate this kind person taking their time out to consider her flatmate. My flatmates would leave alcohol cans/bottles everywhere, leave open pork/bacon in the fridge and even on counters despite knowing i was muslim but i never said anything
100%
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Trinculo
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(Original post by Anonymous)
as a muslim who has lived with non-muslims for 2 years of uni, i really appreciate this kind person taking their time out to consider her flatmate. My flatmates would leave alcohol cans/bottles everywhere, leave open pork/bacon in the fridge and even on counters despite knowing i was muslim but i never said anything
That's your problem, not their's.

Why would you expect people to make changed on the basis of your culture and religion? Their culture is to eat pork and drink alcohol. Why does what you like trump what they like? That's kind of the definition of snowflakery.
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Trinculo
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#16
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If you don't like pork and booze - there's a really simple solution - live with other people who also don't like those things. Don't expect others to change because of you. That's kind of a rule for life in general.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Trinculo)
What the hell is this? It's not for you to make them comfortable. They're not disabled. I think a grown adult can deal with living in a normal house with normal people.

What, did you think Muslims need like a special shower rails or stairlifts or something? Kinda bigoted of you.
I apologize that trying to be considerate is so upsetting to you. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to make someone comfortable, ie by having pork in the fridge or visibly drinking or having my boyfriend round. Luckily you're not the one who has to live with us so don't you worry about my own concerns.
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New Foil
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(Original post by Trinculo)
If you don't like pork and booze - there's a really simple solution - live with other people who also don't like those things. Don't expect others to change because of you. That's kind of a rule for life in general.
I done see anyone *expecting* anything in this thread? Or for anyone to change?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I apologize that trying to be considerate is so upsetting to you. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to make someone comfortable, ie by having pork in the fridge or visibly drinking or having my boyfriend round. Luckily you're not the one who has to live with us so don't you worry about my own concerns.
*Uncomfortable, even
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New Foil
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#20
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I apologize that trying to be considerate is so upsetting to you. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to make someone comfortable, ie by having pork in the fridge or visibly drinking or having my boyfriend round. Luckily you're not the one who has to live with us so don't you worry about my own concerns.
I’m not religious at all and my Uni flat mate was Muslim too. Its really nice that you’re thinking of them, but every Muslim is different, you won’t know until you meet her (how strict she is etc.). My flatmate was pretty religious but didn’t mind at all about the rest of us drinking or anything. Try asking her when you meet her
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