Is this Haram?

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Anonymous #1
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Okay so im a 20 year old guy who currently attends university, I'm 6ft5 and pretty good-looking (nothing special but my friends would say I'm 8/10)

girls would usually show a lot of interest in me but I would force the "I already have a girlfriend card" so they would leave me alone.

However recently , I began to wonder that how long it would be before my kinda-strict Muslim parents asked me to marry someone and I began to think that I really should try to get a girlfriend and just keep it non-sexual.

I have this really hot friend who has showed real interest in me and I feel I could easily get her and plus she is really kind and funny so basically what 90% of men would want , the other 10% being gay men XD.

The issue is that she smokes , drinks and obv is not a Muslim however I know she likes me enough to the point she would convert (at least I hope lol)


So what do you guys think?

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Last edited by BurstingBubbles; 1 month ago
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Moonlight rain
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#2
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Don't assume she'll convert for you just because she likes you because that is a MASSIVE step
Last edited by Moonlight rain; 1 month ago
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Anonymous #2
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Seducing women with the intention of making them convert is unislamic. Do not go down that path. It is a trick Shaytan is using so that he makes you think that youre doing something good but he leads you to evil. You might end up needing a Muslim woman to bring you into the straight path. Dont do it bro, I had this option too but didnt choose to. Knew what Saytaan wanted to do.
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Final Fantasy
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Yeah it's fine. You gotta know who you're dealing with before you get married - this is normal. You can get parents involved as well. Also I'd suggest only doing a Nikkah rather than registering the wedding, that way it's easier to divorce without any baggage - and nowadays, most marriages end in divorce within the same year.
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Anonymous #3
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Okay so im a 20 year old guy who currently attends university, I'm 6ft5 and pretty good-looking (nothing special but my friends would say I'm 8/10)

girls would usually show a lot of interest in me but I would force the "I already have a girlfriend card" so they would leave me alone.

However recently , I began to wonder that how long it would be before my kinda-strict Muslim parents asked me to marry someone and I began to think that I really should try to get a girlfriend and just keep it non-sexual.

I have this really hot friend who has showed real interest in me and I feel I could easily get her and plus she is really kind and funny so basically what 90% of men would want , the other 10% being gay men XD.

The issue is that she smokes , drinks and obv is not a Muslim however I know she likes me enough to the point she would convert (at least I hope lol)


So what do you guys think?
I had a rs with a non-muslim too (with the thought that she would convert in the end).
Not the best choice, I advise against it
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Compost
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Do you like her enough to give up Islam? Do you really think that anyone can decide to believe in something just because they like someone else who does?
Last edited by Compost; 1 month ago
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Moonlight rain)
Don't assume she'll convert for you just because she likes you because that is a MASSIVE step
fair enough , I know very well how hard it would be so I guess i would bring it up to her but I guess I will have to find another if she has no lust to be a muslim or even if she doesnt fully understand how hard it would be to become a muslim . thanks for your comment.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Seducing women with the intention of making them convert is unislamic. Do not go down that path. It is a trick Shaytan is using so that he makes you think that youre doing something good but he leads you to evil. You might end up needing a Muslim woman to bring you into the straight path. Dont do it bro, I had this option too but didnt choose to. Knew what Saytaan wanted to do.
thanks man but my attention was not to convince her to be a muslim but rather understand if she would be willing to do it AFTER i show her all the requirements.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Final Fantasy)
Yeah it's fine. You gotta know who you're dealing with before you get married - this is normal. You can get parents involved as well. Also I'd suggest only doing a Nikkah rather than registering the wedding, that way it's easier to divorce without any baggage - and nowadays, most marriages end in divorce within the same year.
thanks , Im not sure exactly how credible this is but If it is true then I will be very happy lol
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Compost)
Do you like her enough to give up Islam? Do you really think that anyone can decide to believe in something just because they like someone else who does?
I mean its possible? maybe Im just being naieve but I feel it could work and no , I would not give up my faith for any woman
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Compost
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I mean its possible? maybe Im just being naieve but I feel it could work and no , I would not give up my faith for any woman
So why should she give up her faith - or considered lack of it - for you? I cannot imagine being able to compromise my evidenced-based view that there is no involved god for anyone, no matter how hot I found them. It is fundamental to my core values
Last edited by Compost; 1 month ago
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londonmyst
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Going by your desire to please your traditionalist parents, only marry someone of the same religion as yourself and probable intention to raise your own children to follow the same religious & family traditions that you were brought up with- your most compatible marriage options are:
1) a young religious traditionist virgin from an almost identical background but not biologically related to your family who has never been married and shares your ambitions and values,
2) an arranged marriage with a distant relative that your parents know very well and who meets your personal dealbreakers.

I'm female and support both interfaith marriages & friendships.
Since I was a teenager, I've had so many religious guys of different persuasions try to convert me or ask about an arranged marriage with one of their relatives.
My family tree includes centuries of arranged marriages and many of my friends had arranged marriages as teenagers.
I'm 26 and won't go down the arranged marriage route.
I have a lot of dating dealbreakers and avoid all close involvement with guys that are religious or have enthusiasm for the extended family lifestyle.
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anosmianAcrimony
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I mean its possible? maybe Im just being naieve but I feel it could work and no , I would not give up my faith for any woman
And yet you expect her to enter into a faith not her own, for you?
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you.better.eat
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(Original post by Final Fantasy)
Yeah it's fine. You gotta know who you're dealing with before you get married - this is normal. You can get parents involved as well. Also I'd suggest only doing a Nikkah rather than registering the wedding, that way it's easier to divorce without any baggage - and nowadays, most marriages end in divorce within the same year.
U talk like u divorced 30 women
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Justaboutalive
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Don't really like the way you speak as though she'd do anything for you, even become a muslim. Doesn't seem the right motivation here.
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Final Fantasy
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(Original post by londonmyst)
1) a young religious traditionist virgin from an almost identical background but not biologically related to your family who has never been married and shares your ambitions and values,
Lol good luck finding that unicorn. :lol:
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Final Fantasy
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(Original post by you.better.eat)
U talk like u divorced 30 women
Nope, only divorced 1.
Last edited by Final Fantasy; 1 month ago
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you.better.eat
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that was a joke It's the best lemon joke ever .
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Justaboutalive)
Don't really like the way you speak as though she'd do anything for you, even become a muslim. Doesn't seem the right motivation here.
yeah I kinda thought that this is kinda the way its coming off as , my bad. I mean more that I would enquire her about Islam and not force it down her throat
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Anonymous #4
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They must convert for themselves and for Allah no one else otherwise it doesn’t count.
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