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Is this Haram?

Okay so im a 20 year old guy who currently attends university, I'm 6ft5 and pretty good-looking (nothing special but my friends would say I'm 8/10)

girls would usually show a lot of interest in me but I would force the "I already have a girlfriend card" so they would leave me alone.

However recently , I began to wonder that how long it would be before my kinda-strict Muslim parents asked me to marry someone and I began to think that I really should try to get a girlfriend and just keep it non-sexual.

I have this really hot friend who has showed real interest in me and I feel I could easily get her and plus she is really kind and funny so basically what 90% of men would want , the other 10% being gay men XD.

The issue is that she smokes , drinks and obv is not a Muslim however I know she likes me enough to the point she would convert (at least I hope lol)


So what do you guys think?

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(edited 2 years ago)

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Don't assume she'll convert for you just because she likes you because that is a MASSIVE step
(edited 2 years ago)
Seducing women with the intention of making them convert is unislamic. Do not go down that path. It is a trick Shaytan is using so that he makes you think that youre doing something good but he leads you to evil. You might end up needing a Muslim woman to bring you into the straight path. Dont do it bro, I had this option too but didnt choose to. Knew what Saytaan wanted to do.
Original post by Anonymous
Okay so im a 20 year old guy who currently attends university, I'm 6ft5 and pretty good-looking (nothing special but my friends would say I'm 8/10)

girls would usually show a lot of interest in me but I would force the "I already have a girlfriend card" so they would leave me alone.

However recently , I began to wonder that how long it would be before my kinda-strict Muslim parents asked me to marry someone and I began to think that I really should try to get a girlfriend and just keep it non-sexual.

I have this really hot friend who has showed real interest in me and I feel I could easily get her and plus she is really kind and funny so basically what 90% of men would want , the other 10% being gay men XD.

The issue is that she smokes , drinks and obv is not a Muslim however I know she likes me enough to the point she would convert (at least I hope lol)


So what do you guys think?

I had a rs with a non-muslim too (with the thought that she would convert in the end).
Not the best choice, I advise against it
Reply 4
Do you like her enough to give up Islam? Do you really think that anyone can decide to believe in something just because they like someone else who does?
(edited 2 years ago)
Reply 5
Original post by Moonlight rain
Don't assume she'll convert for you just because she likes you because that is a MASSIVE step

fair enough , I know very well how hard it would be so I guess i would bring it up to her but I guess I will have to find another if she has no lust to be a muslim or even if she doesnt fully understand how hard it would be to become a muslim . thanks for your comment.
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous
Seducing women with the intention of making them convert is unislamic. Do not go down that path. It is a trick Shaytan is using so that he makes you think that youre doing something good but he leads you to evil. You might end up needing a Muslim woman to bring you into the straight path. Dont do it bro, I had this option too but didnt choose to. Knew what Saytaan wanted to do.

thanks man but my attention was not to convince her to be a muslim but rather understand if she would be willing to do it AFTER i show her all the requirements.
Reply 7
thanks , Im not sure exactly how credible this is but If it is true then I will be very happy lol
Reply 8
Original post by Compost
Do you like her enough to give up Islam? Do you really think that anyone can decide to believe in something just because they like someone else who does?

I mean its possible? maybe Im just being naieve but I feel it could work and no , I would not give up my faith for any woman
Reply 9
Original post by Anonymous
I mean its possible? maybe Im just being naieve but I feel it could work and no , I would not give up my faith for any woman

So why should she give up her faith - or considered lack of it - for you? I cannot imagine being able to compromise my evidenced-based view that there is no involved god for anyone, no matter how hot I found them. It is fundamental to my core values
(edited 2 years ago)
Going by your desire to please your traditionalist parents, only marry someone of the same religion as yourself and probable intention to raise your own children to follow the same religious & family traditions that you were brought up with- your most compatible marriage options are:
1) a young religious traditionist virgin from an almost identical background but not biologically related to your family who has never been married and shares your ambitions and values,
2) an arranged marriage with a distant relative that your parents know very well and who meets your personal dealbreakers.

I'm female and support both interfaith marriages & friendships.
Since I was a teenager, I've had so many religious guys of different persuasions try to convert me or ask about an arranged marriage with one of their relatives.
My family tree includes centuries of arranged marriages and many of my friends had arranged marriages as teenagers.
I'm 26 and won't go down the arranged marriage route.
I have a lot of dating dealbreakers and avoid all close involvement with guys that are religious or have enthusiasm for the extended family lifestyle.
Original post by Anonymous
I mean its possible? maybe Im just being naieve but I feel it could work and no , I would not give up my faith for any woman

And yet you expect her to enter into a faith not her own, for you?
U talk like u divorced 30 women
Don't really like the way you speak as though she'd do anything for you, even become a muslim. Doesn't seem the right motivation here.
that was a joke:smile: It's the best lemon joke ever .
Original post by Justaboutalive
Don't really like the way you speak as though she'd do anything for you, even become a muslim. Doesn't seem the right motivation here.

yeah I kinda thought that this is kinda the way its coming off as , my bad. I mean more that I would enquire her about Islam and not force it down her throat
They must convert for themselves and for Allah no one else otherwise it doesn’t count.
Original post by Anonymous
yeah I kinda thought that this is kinda the way its coming off as , my bad. I mean more that I would enquire her about Islam and not force it down her throat

Yeah it did, you sounded a bit full of yourself tbh. That's cool, you can try, but to ask someone about islam you also need to be a good example of a muslim too ygm.
Original post by anosmianAcrimony
And yet you expect her to enter into a faith not her own, for you?

No, from what I've seen it is usually not just for one guy.
Also to be accepted by his parents, their religious community leaders and some extended family members.

Plenty of religious people also believe that missionaries chasing converts or individuals making conversion a condition of marriage will receive blessings from the almighty during their lives or an afterlife reward for saving souls and increasing the follower count of the congregation.
Original post by Anonymous
Okay so im a 20 year old guy who currently attends university, I'm 6ft5 and pretty good-looking (nothing special but my friends would say I'm 8/10)

girls would usually show a lot of interest in me but I would force the "I already have a girlfriend card" so they would leave me alone.

However recently , I began to wonder that how long it would be before my kinda-strict Muslim parents asked me to marry someone and I began to think that I really should try to get a girlfriend and just keep it non-sexual.

I have this really hot friend who has showed real interest in me and I feel I could easily get her and plus she is really kind and funny so basically what 90% of men would want , the other 10% being gay men XD.

The issue is that she smokes , drinks and obv is not a Muslim however I know she likes me enough to the point she would convert (at least I hope lol)

So what do you guys think?


No point in saying you want a non-sexual relationship because you'll get to a point where you have did everything and want to do more, which means being intimate etc.

Assuming the girl would convert for you is wrong for 3 reasons. Just because someone likes you doesn't mean they want your religion or to do every single thing the way you do it. The second, it can be classed as shirk to convert for other than Allāh's sake (riya). The third, even if she did convert, how are you sure she actually did it because she actually believed, and wouldn't end up as a Munafiq.

As regards for marriage, Islamic marriage is very different from Secular marriage. All you have to do is sign a contract, with witnesses, and you can do whatever you want as a normal relationship. If it doesn't end well, you can divorce easily as a normal relationships break up, since it won't cost a fortune like Secular divorce. What's the point in doing haraam and accumulating the sins when instead you could sign a simple contract and gain rewards written for you for intimacy with your partner.

Remember that it's narrated The Prophet (ﷺ) said it is better to be hit in the nail on the head, than to touch a woman who is not lawful for you

Conclusion, obviously it's haraam.

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