Extremely worried abt best friend. help asap

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Anonymous #1
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Yesterday my friend was picked on in class to read her work, the teacher not realising she has social anxiety, and she panicked and done SH. She scratched all over her arm. Today she did it again.
Today she went round asking everyone in my group if they had a broken ruler, key or something sharp. They told her no obviously then she went round to the boys asking them and I had to go round telling everyone to tell her no.
Then in class made me promise to stay alive if she died or killed herself and live my life for the both of us because I'm her bsf . And I'm so scared she'd end up doing it one day I won't be there to stop her or get help.
She says stuff like that all the time and her counsellors and parents know so telling someone is no good.
For now I know she won't do that because she knows I need her and promised she'd stay for me but ended up saying she can't keep promises forever.
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mutants are best
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Okay, first of all - you are an amazing friend. She is lucky to have you, and I hope that things get better for the both of you. I know from experience how hard it is to have a friend who struggles like that, and you seem to be supporting her to the best of your ability. Really, the only advice I can give is to continue supporting her like you are, keep checking up on her as often as possible and keeping an eye on her responses. If you feel she is in immediate danger of ending her life, do not hesitate to call an ambulance for her, but hopefully you will never have to do that.
Whatever happens, don't forget to take care of yourself as well. If you need someone to talk to, you can always PM me, I'm always happy to talk.
I really hope things get better. You're not alone in this, and you are a brilliant friend, never forget that
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by mutants are best)
Okay, first of all - you are an amazing friend. She is lucky to have you, and I hope that things get better for the both of you. I know from experience how hard it is to have a friend who struggles like that, and you seem to be supporting her to the best of your ability. Really, the only advice I can give is to continue supporting her like you are, keep checking up on her as often as possible and keeping an eye on her responses. If you feel she is in immediate danger of ending her life, do not hesitate to call an ambulance for her, but hopefully you will never have to do that.
Whatever happens, don't forget to take care of yourself as well. If you need someone to talk to, you can always PM me, I'm always happy to talk.
I really hope things get better. You're not alone in this, and you are a brilliant friend, never forget that
I just feel like I should do more and that I'm letting her down. Thanks. Hopefully things do get better
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shebk
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I’m sorry to hear that
How old is she?
How long does she have social anxiety?
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yesterday my friend was picked on in class to read her work, the teacher not realising she has social anxiety, and she panicked and done SH. She scratched all over her arm. Today she did it again.
Today she went round asking everyone in my group if they had a broken ruler, key or something sharp. They told her no obviously then she went round to the boys asking them and I had to go round telling everyone to tell her no.
Then in class made me promise to stay alive if she died or killed herself and live my life for the both of us because I'm her bsf . And I'm so scared she'd end up doing it one day I won't be there to stop her or get help.
She says stuff like that all the time and her counsellors and parents know so telling someone is no good.
For now I know she won't do that because she knows I need her and promised she'd stay for me but ended up saying she can't keep promises forever.
I think that Childline would help you.

https://www.childline.org.uk/get-support/
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mutants are best
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I just feel like I should do more and that I'm letting her down. Thanks. Hopefully things do get better
No you are not letting her down at all, there's only so much you can do in a situation like that. It's tough but sometimes all you can do is support her while people who are qualified provide the help you can't. It's not a bad reflection on you, you're doing the best you possibly can
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by mutants are best)
No you are not letting her down at all, there's only so much you can do in a situation like that. It's tough but sometimes all you can do is support her while people who are qualified provide the help you can't. It's not a bad reflection on you, you're doing the best you possibly can
Thanks
(Original post by Kerzen)
I think that Childline would help you.

https://www.childline.org.uk/get-support/
Tried that they couldn't do much
(Original post by shebk)
I’m sorry to hear that
How old is she?
How long does she have social anxiety?
She is 14 like me. I'm not sure but she also has PTSD, depression, an ED and has bipolar moments aswell as anxiety/panic attacks. I know how to help with the ED, anxiety/panic attacks as i get them too but i feel useless.
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shebk
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Thanks

Tried that they couldn't do much

She is 14 like me. I'm not sure but she also has PTSD, depression, an ED and has bipolar moments aswell as anxiety/panic attacks. I know how to help with the ED, anxiety/panic attacks as i get them too but i feel useless.
Does it affect her study?
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Anonymous #2
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I don’t get the above responses at all - tell one of your teachers immediately! They have training to aid young people with this type of thing and can push for her to get the external help she needs also.
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Noodlzzz
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You are 14. Please please talk to a teacher!
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Anonymous #3
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try and speak to someone as soona s you can, you guys are so young, reach out for help and it will be so much easier x

It's not easy telling someone about it but once that step is taken it will be so much better, it's alot of stress to keep it to yourself so please tell a teacher
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Analyst89
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yesterday my friend was picked on in class to read her work, the teacher not realising she has social anxiety, and she panicked and done SH. She scratched all over her arm. Today she did it again.
Today she went round asking everyone in my group if they had a broken ruler, key or something sharp. They told her no obviously then she went round to the boys asking them and I had to go round telling everyone to tell her no.
Then in class made me promise to stay alive if she died or killed herself and live my life for the both of us because I'm her bsf . And I'm so scared she'd end up doing it one day I won't be there to stop her or get help.
She says stuff like that all the time and her counsellors and parents know so telling someone is no good.
For now I know she won't do that because she knows I need her and promised she'd stay for me but ended up saying she can't keep promises forever.
0) You can try nlp exercises, meditation, breathing techniques, visualisation. You can read books on this subject and there is a wealth of resources on the internet, youtube regarding this subject.

1) Relax, imagine you're just observing or there as a traveller. For example, if you are on holiday, you go there to experience and observe the attraction, you're not going to get anxious doing that are you?

2) Smile, smiling in contagious.

3) Be confident, respect yourself, accept yourself, work out, wear good clothes, feel good, focus on your passions, know you are a good person who treats people well, you have got as much right as everyone else.

Think positively, be proud of yourself, do things that make you happy, remember your happy times, what makes you confident? What makes you proud? Do you have a skill you are good at? Do things like cooking, driving, learning that increases your confidence daily. Relax.

Have good posture, body language, improve your appearance. Be happy with yourself.

4) Dress well, have good grooming, hairstyle, have good posture.

5) Just say hi or hey to people in your vicinity, who cares if they don't say anything back?

6) Ask how they are, how's everything, how's it going, what's the latest, what made them choose this course, their plans for the future, their plans for the rest of the day, weekend, how was their weekend, their day, what they will get up to, what they got up to, ask them about their hobbies, talk about what's happening. You could read up on current affairs.

Talk about the weather or did you see that sports game? Just mingle with them,

Compliment them, say "I like your jacket".

If you know they went on a holiday or somewhere, ask them about it etc.

7) Be passionate about life.

8) In group discussions, relax and talk to someone close or if someone says something you know, you can talk then. Stay relaxed.

9) Lighten up, have a laugh, laugh easily, be friendly, approachable, interested, relaxed.

10) You can write things down and come up with a rational reframed response, keep a journal of your thoughts, reach out slowly.

These are free to use:

-The Samaritans, you can call 116 123, which is available 24 hours a day

-Mind, 0300 123 3393

-Saneline, 0300 304 7000, from 4.30pm-10.30pm

-The mix, 0800 808 4994, 11am-11pm

-SHOUT, text 852258, 24 hour text service

Continue being there for her and you have excellent replies here.
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