LouangeKabran
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For a while now i’ve wanted to move city and start new i’m 19 and doing Biomecical science in birmingham, i want to move to cambridge where my boyfriend (who my parents know and love) is at uni, i’d like to transfer to the same course i’m doing now but at his uni, he said to support me with housing if i do come over he’d cancel his accommodation and we’d get somewhere together to make a cost a bit less for me, I want to do really bad but my family stopped me from moving away last year and i feel like they will do their best to make me stay again but i can never get through to them that i’m unhappy here and want to move away am i just being a bad child ?
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Kerzen
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(Original post by LouangeKabran)
For a while now i’ve wanted to move city and start new i’m 19 and doing Biomecical science in birmingham, i want to move to cambridge where my boyfriend (who my parents know and love) is at uni, i’d like to transfer to the same course i’m doing now but at his uni, he said to support me with housing if i do come over he’d cancel his accommodation and we’d get somewhere together to make a cost a bit less for me, I want to do really bad but my family stopped me from moving away last year and i feel like they will do their best to make me stay again but i can never get through to them that i’m unhappy here and want to move away am i just being a bad child ?
I think that you are being unwise.

In my view, the best thing would be for you to complete your degree before making any plans to move.
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LouangeKabran
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(Original post by Kerzen)
I think that you are being unwise.

In my view, the best thing would be for you to complete your degree before making any plans to move.
Thank you for being honest.
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black tea
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I don't think you can just transfer to Cambridge like that!
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LouangeKabran
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(Original post by black tea)
I don't think you can just transfer to Cambridge like that!
I contacted the uni and i’ve started the process kind of they wanted some information from me that i sent over and i’m waiting for the reply but it’s not Cambridge university by the way it’s Anglia Ruskin in Cambridge
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Kerzen
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(Original post by LouangeKabran)
I contacted the uni and i’ve started the process kind of they wanted some information from me that i sent over and i’m waiting for the reply but it’s not Cambridge university by the way it’s Anglia Ruskin in Cambridge
Are you at Birmingham University now, but considering switching to Anglia Ruskin?
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LouangeKabran
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(Original post by Kerzen)
Are you at Birmingham University now, but considering switching to Anglia Ruskin?
yes
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LouangeKabran
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(Original post by LouangeKabran)
yes
Yes birmingham city university to anglia ruskin university
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Surnia
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Moving to another uni just because your boyfriend is there isn't the right move; is that why you are unhappy or is it something else? If it's the former, how will you cope if you are struggling to establish your future careers in the same location, or they keep you apart from any length of time?

If it's a strong relationship it will survive you being apart.If you live together there will be too many commitments and distractions from not only your studies, but enjoying the uni experience of getting involved in extra-curricular activities. And worse case scenario, what if the pair of you broke up?
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shooonthebeat
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(Original post by LouangeKabran)
For a while now i’ve wanted to move city and start new i’m 19 and doing Biomecical science in birmingham, i want to move to cambridge where my boyfriend (who my parents know and love) is at uni, i’d like to transfer to the same course i’m doing now but at his uni, he said to support me with housing if i do come over he’d cancel his accommodation and we’d get somewhere together to make a cost a bit less for me, I want to do really bad but my family stopped me from moving away last year and i feel like they will do their best to make me stay again but i can never get through to them that i’m unhappy here and want to move away am i just being a bad child ?
No you're not being a bad child. You're old enough to make your own decisions. If you're really unhappy where you are and want to move then do it. You need to figure out what's best for yourself, your decisions might upset your family but if it's really what's best for you then I'd suggest going through with it. Plus at this age your family can't really stop you, do what you gotta do.
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LouangeKabran
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(Original post by Surnia)
Moving to another uni just because your boyfriend is there isn't the right move; is that why you are unhappy or is it something else? If it's the former, how will you cope if you are struggling to establish your future careers in the same location, or they keep you apart from any length of time?

If it's a strong relationship it will survive you being apart.If you live together there will be too many commitments and distractions from not only your studies, but enjoying the uni experience of getting involved in extra-curricular activities. And worse case scenario, what if the pair of you broke up?
i spoke to my parents and they are reluctant but on board they’ve started giving me advice and say they want me to be happy i always wanted to go away for uni to begin with and i strongly believe that won’t happen but if we do break up i wouldn’t made my friends there and a new life, it won’t be the end of the world i’ll pick up the pieces and fix the mistake i made but i know that if i don’t try i won’t be very happy i missed the first opportunity to move away i don’t want to miss this one, i love my family to the ends of the earth and this has no reflection on them it’s just an experience i want to experience ill be back to birmingham once my course is done i just really want to experience this but i do understand all the points that everyone has made against the decision and i really appreciate the time you took to point these things out to me
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LouangeKabran
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(Original post by shooonthebeat)
No you're not being a bad child. You're old enough to make your own decisions. If you're really unhappy where you are and want to move then do it. You need to figure out what's best for yourself, your decisions might upset your family but if it's really what's best for you then I'd suggest going through with it. Plus at this age your family can't really stop you, do what you gotta do.
That’s how i’ve always felt it’s something i want to experience and i think ultimately it’s my choice and if it doesn’t work out then it doesn’t but at least i’ve tried it, but if i don’t then i might miss out on the most amazing couple years of my life, thank you for your support and advice i really appreciate it
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Kerzen
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(Original post by LouangeKabran)
i spoke to my parents and they are reluctant but on board they’ve started giving me advice and say they want me to be happy i always wanted to go away for uni to begin with and i strongly believe that won’t happen but if we do break up i wouldn’t made my friends there and a new life, it won’t be the end of the world i’ll pick up the pieces and fix the mistake i made but i know that if i don’t try i won’t be very happy i missed the first opportunity to move away i don’t want to miss this one, i love my family to the ends of the earth and this has no reflection on them it’s just an experience i want to experience ill be back to birmingham once my course is done i just really want to experience this but i do understand all the points that everyone has made against the decision and i really appreciate the time you took to point these things out to me
Are you going to be living together if you do move?
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LouangeKabran
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(Original post by Kerzen)
Are you going to be living together if you do move?
yes we will we’ll be getting a flat together
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Kerzen
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(Original post by LouangeKabran)
yes we will we’ll be getting a flat together
That's going to be expensive, Cambridge isn't a place where there are bargains. How much do you think a flat is for a month?

Something which I would consider, though, is how this is going to affect the division of your time during the day. It's going to be difficult to avoid doing more 'domestic' stuff and my concern would be that you would slide towards that, do a bit more of the cooking, a bit more of the laundry etc. I hate the thought of you washing dishes at 10 o'clock in the evening and wondering when you are going to get the time to finish off your outstanding academic work.

To me as a woman who is closer in age to your Mum than you, it does seem a shame for someone of 19 to be signing up for this when you could have stayed independent.
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iwriteletters
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(Original post by LouangeKabran)
For a while now i’ve wanted to move city and start new i’m 19 and doing Biomecical science in birmingham, i want to move to cambridge where my boyfriend (who my parents know and love) is at uni, i’d like to transfer to the same course i’m doing now but at his uni, he said to support me with housing if i do come over he’d cancel his accommodation and we’d get somewhere together to make a cost a bit less for me, I want to do really bad but my family stopped me from moving away last year and i feel like they will do their best to make me stay again but i can never get through to them that i’m unhappy here and want to move away am i just being a bad child ?
If I was you I'd think about reasons to move excluding your partner being in Cambridge. Think about life there, if that something you'd prefer over Birmingham/home/where you live right now? Is the course better taught at Anglia Ruskin from what you read about it? is there a lot of job offers in your field in Cambridge for after you finish uni? Would you want to live in Cambridge after uni, if you have to stay home will that make your mental health decline?

Personally I love the atmosphere in Cambridge. I don't have personal experience in this particularly but I hope something in there is helpful! You're not being bad for wanting to move onto your own path, it shows you understand your feelings and know that something might need to change in your life. It's not selfish, it's brave <3
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LouangeKabran
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(Original post by iwriteletters)
If I was you I'd think about reasons to move excluding your partner being in Cambridge. Think about life there, if that something you'd prefer over Birmingham/home/where you live right now? Is the course better taught at Anglia Ruskin from what you read about it? is there a lot of job offers in your field in Cambridge for after you finish uni? Would you want to live in Cambridge after uni, if you have to stay home will that make your mental health decline?

Personally I love the atmosphere in Cambridge. I don't have personal experience in this particularly but I hope something in there is helpful! You're not being bad for wanting to move onto your own path, it shows you understand your feelings and know that something might need to change in your life. It's not selfish, it's brave <3
I really appreciate that thank you, there is a lot of wisdom in there and it was very helpful thank you very much
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LouangeKabran
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(Original post by Kerzen)
That's going to be expensive, Cambridge isn't a place where there are bargains. How much do you think a flat is for a month?

Something which I would consider, though, is how this is going to affect the division of your time during the day. It's going to be difficult to avoid doing more 'domestic' stuff and my concern would be that you would slide towards that, do a bit more of the cooking, a bit more of the laundry etc. I hate the thought of you washing dishes at 10 o'clock in the evening and wondering when you are going to get the time to finish off your outstanding academic work.

To me as a woman who is closer in age to your Mum than you, it does seem a shame for someone of 19 to be signing up for this when you could have stayed independent.
I understand where ur coming from, but i live alone in Birmingham anyways i have been for about a year now doing all my own domestic duties in my flat, if anything ill have a little bit of help with my partner yes i’d be away from my family but it won’t change much of what i do for myself here if that makes sense
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