when to tell strict parents i am moving out

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Anonymous #1
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Hello TSR! So currently stuck in a sticky situation. I just finished year 13 and I am taking a gap year to then apply for medicine. My question is when should I tell my parents I am not planning to live with them? Issue is they are potentially going to disown me for moving out (dad has told me before, both are very against it when I have brought it up, saying it’ll bring dishonour to the family). I am not sure how student finances are going to go, what would I really need from my parents when applying for the maintenance loan? Should I lie throughout the year, telling them that I am staying and drop the bomb next year summer? I’d appreciate any help, apologies if this is in the wrong forum I didn’t know where else to post this! : ))
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hello TSR! So currently stuck in a sticky situation. I just finished year 13 and I am taking a gap year to then apply for medicine. My question is when should I tell my parents I am not planning to live with them? Issue is they are potentially going to disown me for moving out (dad has told me before, both are very against it when I have brought it up, saying it’ll bring dishonour to the family). I am not sure how student finances are going to go, what would I really need from my parents when applying for the maintenance loan? Should I lie throughout the year, telling them that I am staying and drop the bomb next year summer? I’d appreciate any help, apologies if this is in the wrong forum I didn’t know where else to post this! : ))
Do you mean tell them that you will be living in Halls when you are at University?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Kerzen)
Do you mean tell them that you will be living in Halls when you are at University?
yep!
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Anonymous)
yep!
Will they not realise that this will be the case when you submit your application for a place at Medical School, which you will be doing later this year?
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Ten-Ten
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Maybe tell them on the day you move out. Or tell them after you’ve moved out😂😂
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Kerzen)
Will they not realise that this will be the case when you submit your application for a place at Medical School, which you will be doing later this year?
ah I did not know parents can track your UCAS application, I was just thinking of telling them I applied to unis nearby... is there a possible way to hide it...?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Ten-Ten)
Maybe tell them on the day you move out. Or tell them after you’ve moved out😂😂
I GOTTA GIVE THEM TIME TO MARINATE THE NEWS LOLOL I was thinking maybe on the week of me moving out? A month before??
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Anonymous)
ah I did not know parents can track your UCAS application, I was just thinking of telling them I applied to unis nearby... is there a possible way to hide it...?
I didn't mean to suggest that they could track your application!

I thought that it was something you would probably tell them about.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Kerzen)
I didn't mean to suggest that they could track your application!

I thought that it was something you would probably tell them about.
AHHHH That is the thing... I do not wish to tell them I applied to unis that are far
Should I lie and tell them I applied to unis nearby? I don't want to risk potentially getting disowned over my gap year :afraid:
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Nana2080
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hello TSR! So currently stuck in a sticky situation. I just finished year 13 and I am taking a gap year to then apply for medicine. My question is when should I tell my parents I am not planning to live with them? Issue is they are potentially going to disown me for moving out (dad has told me before, both are very against it when I have brought it up, saying it’ll bring dishonour to the family). I am not sure how student finances are going to go, what would I really need from my parents when applying for the maintenance loan? Should I lie throughout the year, telling them that I am staying and drop the bomb next year summer? I’d appreciate any help, apologies if this is in the wrong forum I didn’t know where else to post this! : ))
You should tell them that the day where u move out will come anyway soo..
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hungrysalamander
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Don't worry your parents don't haave access to your ucas info so they can't see which unis you applied to
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Nana2080)
You should tell them that the day where u move out will come anyway soo..
on the day? damn tis harsh but... i guess so.... would it not be a bit too mean...?
also is your username nana a reference to the anime
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Anonymous)
AHHHH That is the thing... I do not wish to tell them I applied to unis that are far
Should I lie and tell them I applied to unis nearby? I don't want to risk potentially getting disowned over my gap year :afraid:
I wouldn't recommend that you lie.

I wonder whether there is a case for telling them at the stage when you are about to be interviewed.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by hungrysalamander)
Don't worry your parents don't haave access to your ucas info so they can't see which unis you applied to
ahh okay thank you!! I guess I am more so worried about student finances
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Kerzen)
I wouldn't recommend that you lie.

I wonder whether there is a case for telling them at the stage when you are about to be interviewed.
Thing is they'll be definitely asking what unis I have applied to as soon I have sent my application off? Should I perhaps apply to two unis that are nearby? Just to tell them that I have, even though I do not want to go...? :confused:
Thank you so much for your replies, I really do appreciate them!!
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Kerzen
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By the way, have you created a proper timetable for yourself which tells you when you need to be doing specific things over the next 12 months, such as submitting your UCAS application?

I'm not in medicine but can see from the medical forums on here that applicants are taking tests like the BMAT and so on.
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shooonthebeat
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(Original post by Anonymous)
ahh okay thank you!! I guess I am more so worried about student finances
For student finance, without your parents info you'll still get a maintenance loan but it'll be a lot less (I think around £3k for the whole year) but if you want more then one of your parents (preferably the lowest earning one) needs to provide their details and you can receive up to I think £9k maintenance loan depending on how much they earn.
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Thing is they'll be definitely asking what unis I have applied to as soon I have sent my application off? Should I perhaps apply to two unis that are nearby? Just to tell them that I have, even though I do not want to go...? :confused:
Thank you so much for your replies, I really do appreciate them!!
Where would you actually like to study medicine if all things were equal?

I hasten to add that I can see that the medical forum on here has a thread where people advise on which med school will be the best fit for individual cases, so your original thoughts and your best option might not be the same.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Kerzen)
By the way, have you created a proper timetable for yourself which tells you when you need to be doing specific things over the next 12 months, such as submitting your UCAS application?

I'm not in medicine but can see from the medical forums on here that applicants are taking tests like the BMAT and so on.
Ah yes! I do have a list of things I need to do for my UCAS application! Taking UCAT around late August, sending off applications in October and doing the BMAT in November! Interviews I am quite unsure of though... they come at a range
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by shooonthebeat)
For student finance, without your parents info you'll still get a maintenance loan but it'll be a lot less (I think around £3k for the whole year) but if you want more then one of your parents (preferably the lowest earning one) needs to provide their details and you can receive up to I think £9k maintenance loan depending on how much they earn.
Ahhhh!! Thank you! And is this something that has to be renewed every year? Or is it just done once?
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