Online dating advice

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Flave21
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#1
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I'm thinking of creating my own account in tinder, also I have to think about my social life, since that I never had friends (growing up) to trust at first. Yes, I want to look for a gf now (I never had a gf before), even though I'm focusing onto myself achieving things that I haven't, such as 2 GCSE subjects and career goals.

I'm not that desperate about having relationship (since that I'm not thinking about starting a family and having kids), but it could benefit me if I start dating now, I just want to experience and learn how to enjoy with someone who adores and understand my journey.

However, I don't have anyone to take a photo of me, I still have a fat lot of shyness in me, but I want to develop confidence and tackle it head on. Any advice would anyone give me?
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WazzWazz98
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(Original post by Flave21)
I'm thinking of creating my own account in tinder, also I have to think about my social life, since that I never had friends (growing up) to trust at first. Yes, I want to look for a gf now (I never had a gf before), even though I'm focusing onto myself achieving things that I haven't, such as 2 GCSE subjects and career goals.

I'm not that desperate about having relationship (since that I'm not thinking about starting a family and having kids), but it could benefit me if I start dating now, I just want to experience and learn how to enjoy with someone who adores and understand my journey.

However, I don't have anyone to take a photo of me, I still have a fat lot of shyness in me, but I want to develop confidence and tackle it head on. Any advice would anyone give me?
how old are you op?
and a family and kids arent essential in a relationship
making tinder is ok but remember that many people are superficial / match for an ego boost so take matches with a pinch of salt

also you can take selfies, put a timer on your camera and stand it up somewhere etc

good luck
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Flave21
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(Original post by WazzWazz98)
how old are you op?
and a family and kids arent essential in a relationship
making tinder is ok but remember that many people are superficial / match for an ego boost so take matches with a pinch of salt

also you can take selfies, put a timer on your camera and stand it up somewhere etc

good luck
I'm 24 and asian
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WazzWazz98
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(Original post by Flave21)
I'm 24 and asian
Give it a whirl and see what becomes of it!
You won't know until you try, right ?
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username3962008
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(Original post by Flave21)
I'm thinking of creating my own account in tinder, also I have to think about my social life, since that I never had friends (growing up) to trust at first. Yes, I want to look for a gf now (I never had a gf before), even though I'm focusing onto myself achieving things that I haven't, such as 2 GCSE subjects and career goals.

I'm not that desperate about having relationship (since that I'm not thinking about starting a family and having kids), but it could benefit me if I start dating now, I just want to experience and learn how to enjoy with someone who adores and understand my journey.

However, I don't have anyone to take a photo of me, I still have a fat lot of shyness in me, but I want to develop confidence and tackle it head on. Any advice would anyone give me?
What do you want in a girl? Do you want them to have an undergraduate degree? Are you just interested in other Asian women?
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Flave21
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(Original post by WazzWazz98)
Give it a whirl and see what becomes of it!
You won't know until you try, right ?
Exactly, it's all about being positive with the (possibly) right person
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Flave21
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(Original post by Rosessta3rs7)
What do you want in a girl? Do you want them to have an undergraduate degree? Are you just interested in other Asian women?
Doesn't matter if she's Asian or any race is the most common sense (tbh I do fancy an English lass, genuinely attractive, stunningly gorgeous, right set of mind, honest, had graduated and achieved a degree), I don't really have the full confidence that I think she'll be the one for me (because it depends on the chemistry and how she finds me attractive), but at least it would be a blast getting to know new people.
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username3962008
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(Original post by Flave21)
Doesn't matter if she's Asian or any race is the most common sense (tbh I do fancy an English lass, genuinely attractive, stunningly gorgeous, right set of mind, honest, had graduated and achieved a degree), I don't really have the full confidence that I think she'll be the one for me (because it depends on the chemistry and how she finds me attractive), but at least it would be a blast getting to know new people.
That's good to know you are open minded, this increases your dating prospects. For me personally, I don't really mind about a guy's educational background, they just have to treat me right.
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Meritina
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My advice would be to not go into it with the mindset of finding love. Just keep an open mind and treat it as an experience to meet new people and learn about the different stories of others. Also, try not to be too harsh with your expectations and standards as not everyone has got their life figured out at this age either. Just chat with new people, meet the ones you click with on a casual schedule and see what happens from there.

Tinder isn't exactly the best place for those things, although there are rare occasions where people do find relationships. I would suggest Bumble as a better option, the people there seem to be more serious, at least from my own experience.
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Flave21
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(Original post by Meritina)
My advice would be to not go into it with the mindset of finding love. Just keep an open mind and treat it as an experience to meet new people and learn about the different stories of others. Also, try not to be too harsh with your expectations and standards as not everyone has got their life figured out at this age either. Just chat with new people, meet the ones you click with on a casual schedule and see what happens from there.

Tinder isn't exactly the best place for those things, although there are rare occasions where people do find relationships. I would suggest Bumble as a better option, the people there seem to be more serious, at least from my own experience.
I might be way ahead of that, my mindset now isn't always about finding love to someone, like I said from the top, I am focusing on to my career and achieving what I haven't, I don't stress myself to look for relationship, it just needs time.

Would you suggest that I should approach women out in streets?

Although, I don't know what to do when it comes to creating a profile in online dating, it requires photos and I don't have any one to take me photo.
Last edited by Flave21; 1 month ago
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Meritina
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(Original post by Flave21)
I might be way ahead of that, my mindset now isn't always about finding love to someone, like I said from the top, I am focusing on to my career and achieving what I haven't, I don't stress myself to look for relationship, it just needs time.

Would you suggest that I should approach women out in streets?

Although, I don't know what to do when it comes to creating a profile in online dating, it requires photos and I don't have any one to take me photo.
No, I personally would not approach strangers in the streets. More so now with Covid but also a lot of women are starting to feel more and more unsafe when out walking alone due to all the recent happenings with women being attacked by men etc. Also, you probably would not know whether they are looking to meet people anyway, it would probably be an unwelcome act and maybe even deemed 'creepy'.

If you would rather meet people in person, your best bet would be to go to a bar, café, somewhere where students go to. Join some local clubs; if you like exercise, why not join a running club... Small things like that.

In regards to taking a photo, just use your camera on your phone and take a picture of yourself, or take a picture in the mirror with the back camera. Professional looking photos often don't get you far anyway because it may come across the wrong way (that you're egocentric).
Last edited by Meritina; 1 month ago
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Flave21
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(Original post by Meritina)
No, I personally would not approach strangers in the streets. More so now with Covid but also a lot of women are starting to feel more and more unsafe when out walking alone due to all the recent happenings with women being attacked by men etc. Also, you probably would not know whether they are looking to meet people anyway, it would probably be an unwelcome act and maybe even deemed 'creepy'.

If you would rather meet people in person, your best bet would be to go to a bar, café, somewhere where students go to. Join some local clubs; if you like exercise, why not join a running club... Small things like that.

In regards to taking a photo, just use your camera on your phone and take a picture of yourself, or take a picture in the mirror with the back camera. Professional looking photos often don't get you far anyway because it may come across the wrong way (that you're egocentric).
Egocentric? Not sure which one to consider that as, whether an insult or offensive.

Anyway, I don't mean streets as in walking by herself streets with a lamp post, what I mean by approaching is to approach her in public place, like town centres and city full of people etc (of course I am aware about men attacking women), obviously I wouldn't do it now because of covid, but I could do it after pandemic and it depends how many people/women would agree about being approach (in a POLITE way as possible🤙🤙) .

Also men feels a bit vulnerable, not being open up to people, don't know where and who to talk to when they feel sad or depressed, being bullied when they were kids and ended up being shy and full doubts about personal image and confidence growing up.
Last edited by Flave21; 1 month ago
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