Is it okay to get lots of surgery done if it means you are going to be confident?

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Okra124
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I personally wouldn’t get surgery done but I’m not necessarily against it as long as you feel confident and happy then I don’t see why not. But what’s your opinion?
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jenerous
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If it requires you to undergo through lots of surgery before you can even feel confident, then that is not confidence.
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Anguissola
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At the end of the day all that matters is you. If it makes you confident then fairs, go for it. Who cares what other people think?
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StriderHort
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Common sense would say 'No' , without addressing any of the underlying insecurities you'd likely just adapt to feeling awkward about the surgery results.
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parmezanne
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i think so. i think that everyone is entitled to do what they want with their appearance - their body, their choice.

if it's something you've been insecure about for your whole life, what difference does it truly make if you change it. it's not that big of a deal in the wider scheme of things. :yep:
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Prettyfrock
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No i would not get any surgery done just to make other people happy or like me
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Stumpy1001
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(Original post by Okra124)
I personally wouldn’t get surgery done but I’m not necessarily against it as long as you feel confident and happy then I don’t see why not. But what’s your opinion?
I think it’s a slippery slope . You aren’t really fixing the underlying issue . ( which is at minimum low self esteem , at worse self hatred ) so what happens if after the surgery you area constantly told you are still unattractive ? Do you get more ? What happens if the surgery doesn’t quite turn out the way you hoped ?

Self acceptance is key I think . Learn to love who you are rather than whine about how you wish you were .
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2PllsIPp
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I agree with the poster who said it's best to have a serious go at working on the underlying issues first.
Often we think 'when I get this surgery, uni offer, job offer, romantic partner, car, etc, then I'll finally have solved psycological/spiritual problem X', when we finally do obtain the thing we think will make our lives perfect, we quickly find another issue to solve.
You may feel confident for a while, but then you will likely start to feel insecure about other things and want to change them too.
Tackling and exploring the underlying issue will be far more fruitful in the long run
Last edited by 2PllsIPp; 3 months ago
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username5173262
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Sure so long as it's coming out of that persons pocket in my opinion.
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MonoStereo
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It's like a plaster. People can do whatever they want with their bodies, but I think as they grow older they may regret it.

It can also be obvious when someone has had surgery and I've never brought it up with anyone (none of my business) but I don't really understand when some then deny having had it done to others.... a bit like botox.
Last edited by MonoStereo; 3 months ago
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gjd800
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i don't really want to make a blanket value judgement on it, because I'm not sure what the criteria would be for stuff to be 'ok' in broader terms

but i will say that there are no guarantees with surgery and so maybe saying whether or not it is 'ok' is really a euphemism for saying, in the cases where people are happier, 'well that worked for you', which is not really the same as saying 'getting surgery is ok if...', in part because 'well that worked for you' is a a post hoc judgement
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username5243162
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“a lot of surgery” won’t make you feel confident. confidence is something that comes within, not without. you can fix a thing that makes you feel a certain type of way, yes. Like nose, which is a problem for lots of people. But doing all those things doesn’t guarantee your confidence will be there forever. You’ll find something else to hate on. At the end of the day, if there wasn’t media with their fake bodies and photoshopped faces that are being promoted, would we ever feel the need to change ourselves or think there’s something that has to be fixed? No. Working on confidence is a totally different thing that doing work on your face or body.
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_Kestrel_
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Generally no imo. I can understand perhaps one surgery to 'correct' something that has been a subject of bullying/severe low self esteem - however, this should only be done if other means of moving on don't work. I think a good judgement is whether the person having surgery would be able to cope if the surgery went wrong e.g. a botched nose job. If they can honestly say they accept the risk of that and would be able to cope than yes, if not (which I would presume is the case normally) they shouldn't go under the knife.

Of course it is more understandable why an individual with gender dysphoria might feel more confident with surgery. Same for someone correcting a 'deformity'/scars/bodily harm.
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Okra124
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(Original post by jenerous)
If it requires you to undergo through lots of surgery before you can even feel confident, then that is not confidence.
Why is that not confidence?
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mspaghetti
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No. Theres no way of telling you will have more confidence. Having multiple surgeries just means you're painted with insecurities, and you can never say for certain that you will be happy after everything is done. I would understand 1 or 2 procedures, but not a lot. I think you have to be comfortable with yourself to gain confidence, but part of that is accepting who you are. Completely changing how you look through surgery is not accepting who you are imo. Your appearance is your mother and father and you have to decide whether or not you want to completely destroy your resemblance and part of your identity.

Summary: only to polish who you are, not to change who you are
Last edited by mspaghetti; 3 months ago
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