told my best friend I feel like we’re drifting

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Anonymous #1
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me and my best friend were super close a few months ago but recently we’ve both been struggling mentally. We’ve both been having space from each other and with that space I think we’ve drifted apart. I want to recover the friendship and get things back to the way they were. When I told my friend how I felt she seemed unbothered by it and didn’t really seem to want that. Anyways the conversation felt very off and I feel like it’s just made us drift even further, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know whether this means our friendship is over or not.
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summerbirdreads
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I'm like literally in the same situation
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by summerbirdreads)
I'm like literally in the same situation
I'm sorry It's such an awful feeling. I just keep telling myself that if she wanted to make the friendship work she would put in more effort in trying to get closer again.
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summerbirdreads
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sorry It's such an awful feeling. I just keep telling myself that if she wanted to make the friendship work she would put in more effort in trying to get closer again.
yes exactly! for me a few months ago talking to my bestfriend was the easiest thing, we used to talk everyday and she used to get really worried if we haven't texted for two days but now we'd go weeks without talking at all and when we do it's filled with awkward pauses and passive aggressive comments and just me making the effort like we had 3 zoom calls in months and that was like the most awkward thing ever and it was just me making the effort and it really pains me since once we were so close and now we are not able to even talk and we did not even have any fights or fall outs or arguments
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sunshine774
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This happened to me and they didn't really seem to care at all. At first I thought maybe we should both put more effort into our friendship, but then I decided to end it because there is no point forcing things.

If it's meant to be in your life, it's not gonna feel so hard to maintain.
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ROTL94
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sorry It's such an awful feeling. I just keep telling myself that if she wanted to make the friendship work she would put in more effort in trying to get closer again.
That's true tbh when people want things they generally make some kind of effort to make it work even if they can only muster a small effort but then you said she's having mental problems so maybe she's just not in the right place right now and needs more space. You know what they say if you love something set it free and if it loves you it'll come back.
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kayinda
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why the drama, you're not lovers just friends
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by kayinda)
why the drama, you're not lovers just friends
I actually think this is a bit of a flippant attitude to have towards something like this. I value my friendships a lot for a reason and that's why I'm upset about it so if you're not being helpful just don't comment at all.
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summerbirdreads
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(Original post by kayinda)
why the drama, you're not lovers just friends
I fall on the aromantic spec so friendship means everything to me and yes friends can have drama not just lovers
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by sunshine774)
This happened to me and they didn't really seem to care at all. At first I thought maybe we should both put more effort into our friendship, but then I decided to end it because there is no point forcing things.

If it's meant to be in your life, it's not gonna feel so hard to maintain.
That's what it's felt like recently. Friendships should be easy to maintain if they're meant to be so I suppose it's time to let it go. Thanks for the advice.
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kayinda
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I actually think this is a bit of a flippant attitude to have towards something like this. I value my friendships a lot for a reason and that's why I'm upset about it so if you're not being helpful just don't comment at all.
ok but that's my experience of friendships so it's interesting to hear your side of it.
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Anonymous #2
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i’m in the same situation. my 1 friends and I had a small disagreement nearly 4 months ago. We apologised and forgave each other. i have since reached out twice and been ignored both times. So i’ve decided not to chase anyone. I’ve been struggling with my mental health before this happened and i need to look after myself and put me first. I think you should focus on yourself and reach out one more time so that you know you have tried. good luck
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