I can't stand my best friend

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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 1 month ago
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Back story, I'm referring to my Best friend as V, we have been friends for 2 years she is pre transition male to female trans woman, she currently lives with her unsupportive, homophobic, transphobic (dead naming, miss gendering) mentaly, and verbally abusive. Basically her family is garbage and I can't stand them. V and I try to hang out atleast once a week typically on Saturdays, this has been going on since last year, we typically binge watch shows, and play games together. But within the last several months just little things have really made me uncomfortable and have annoyed me. For example I have noticed it makes me extremely uncomfortable when we watch a show that I haven't seen before, she constantly looks over at me to see what kind of reaction I have to said show, its gotten to the point that I always wear a hood to block my peripheral vision, I have told her that it bothers me and she still does it. Other times when we are watching something I get quiet and I just like to enjoy, she will make comments, jokes or whatever because she thinks something is up with me, and I drives me nuts. She also constantly apologizes for simple **** she shouldn't have to it upsets me because I know its her **** family making her feel like ****. I'm the only person who sees her this often and I feel slightly trapped, like im the only one she can rely on and my patients is wearing thin, I have had thoughts of taking a break from her but It hasn't happened yet, and I dont know what to do.
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Anonymous #2
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Report 1 month ago
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Back story, I'm referring to my Best friend as V, we have been friends for 2 years she is pre transition male to female trans woman, she currently lives with her unsupportive, homophobic, transphobic (dead naming, miss gendering) mentaly, and verbally abusive. Basically her family is garbage and I can't stand them. V and I try to hang out atleast once a week typically on Saturdays, this has been going on since last year, we typically binge watch shows, and play games together. But within the last several months just little things have really made me uncomfortable and have annoyed me. For example I have noticed it makes me extremely uncomfortable when we watch a show that I haven't seen before, she constantly looks over at me to see what kind of reaction I have to said show, its gotten to the point that I always wear a hood to block my peripheral vision, I have told her that it bothers me and she still does it. Other times when we are watching something I get quiet and I just like to enjoy, she will make comments, jokes or whatever because she thinks something is up with me, and I drives me nuts. She also constantly apologizes for simple **** she shouldn't have to it upsets me because I know its her **** family making her feel like ****. I'm the only person who sees her this often and I feel slightly trapped, like im the only one she can rely on and my patients is wearing thin, I have had thoughts of taking a break from her but It hasn't happened yet, and I dont know what to do.
No. It sounds like she is going through a really hard time but it does seem like it's getting to you which is understandable. Its perfectly normal for people to look at other's to see their reactions subconsciously, especially people who are anxious. From what you've said, it does seem like she is very anxious and if you were to leave her now, it would not be good for either of you.

I'm not going to lie but it does sound like you're being a bit whiney about this- she is the one who has to put up with all of this, not you but I can understand that it's hard for you too.

Try to talk to her and give her help, but do let her know that you need some "me time" and maybe get a trusted adult to help out. It's not something that you guys should be keeping bottled up!
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