Making friends at uni was impossible (rona didn't help)

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neweve
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I don't like to be hateful to people and I was constantly giving the benefit of the doubt, even when people I thought I was close with were constantly leaving me out. The few friends I made on my course all turned nasty and/ or silent on me for some reason and my people I met my accommodation, including my flat were so cliquey. Whenever I would tell anyone, they were surprised saying they thought I was so close with my flat, which I thought too but clearly not. It had gotten so lonely I can't even think of uni without getting extremely anxious and just try to forget it happened. I'm not sure if I wasn't trying hard enough or if I tried to hard. I definitely got unlucky with the people I met, but I'm terrible at making friends so I stayed comfortale with the people I met, but now with how many people turned on me, I have such bad anxiety with trying to make friends and dont't even want to complete uni. I just want to know (and hope) I'm not the only one who has had a horrible experience with people at uni, especially with the cliqueyness I had encountered, which lots of people said didn't even happen at uni. I don't want to just blame everyone else around me but taking the blame or being left out and such only made me feel worse.
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SlaveofAll
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Perhaps you need a newer and better set of friends. I'm always ready to help when you feel down.
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sam_r21xx
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(Original post by neweve)
I don't like to be hateful to people and I was constantly giving the benefit of the doubt, even when people I thought I was close with were constantly leaving me out. The few friends I made on my course all turned nasty and/ or silent on me for some reason and my people I met my accommodation, including my flat were so cliquey. Whenever I would tell anyone, they were surprised saying they thought I was so close with my flat, which I thought too but clearly not. It had gotten so lonely I can't even think of uni without getting extremely anxious and just try to forget it happened. I'm not sure if I wasn't trying hard enough or if I tried to hard. I definitely got unlucky with the people I met, but I'm terrible at making friends so I stayed comfortale with the people I met, but now with how many people turned on me, I have such bad anxiety with trying to make friends and dont't even want to complete uni. I just want to know (and hope) I'm not the only one who has had a horrible experience with people at uni, especially with the cliqueynss I had encountered, which lots of people said didn't even happen at uni. I don't want to just blame everyone else around me but taking the blame or being left out and such only made me feel worse.
Hey sweet! I just hopped on to respond to this, because I resonate so much with you. I also struggle making friends, and always have done. I'm fortunate enough to have a few friends in my hometown, and a couple from when I was at Uni. I've just finished 3rd year, and am moving away in Sept to another uni up country to do an MA. Honestly all I can say is that those people who turned on you, were never your friends to begin with. There are people in this world, that really like to make it known how much they pretend to like us. I feel like you in the sense that people were able to tell I struggled making friends, therefore they felt uncomfortable in my presence, and made everything feel ten times harder. I suggest joining some societies because that's what I did - and it got me out of the house. (I also had housemates that are like your flatmates). Weirdly the more I went out and did my own thing, the more they asked if I wanted to hang out- because they saw that I wasn't afraid to come out of my shell, and that I wasn't about to shut myself away and feel discluded. Of course, I said no thanks because I realized they were never friends, and never will be. Also, please feel free to inbox me. We could all do with a chat sometimes! (Samantha- 21) x
Last edited by sam_r21xx; 1 month ago
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