Is our relationship doomed to fail?

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Anonymous #1
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Copying some bits from my other post concerning sex and emotional connection

Sex life I brief - Quite a bit if everything is good. BDSM, kinks, you name it.

Like he would stay home or go out somewhere else, I would go somewhere else
If we both were at uni together, eventually he would go away or he would be somewhere else, like alone outside, or inside and I would be with friends or by myself
I would go out with friends frequently and spend time with other people and he would skip it sometimes unless we were going with friends together as a couple
He did host an event (very early on in our relationship
2-3 months) translated for some speaker but he stood by himself with other people and not once did he come to me. Even though his team mates all stood with me. When I went and gave him a kiss on the cheek, we just had a very brief 1 sec hug and he walked away.
He was also listening to other people and I stood a few feet away from him and he walked off, so I followed him. Before this, when we were all going to stand together for a photo op, he was busy doing his own thing, whereas I had to look for a space on the other side.

Also, he thinks I'm very attractive so uses my photos as his wallpaper and shares our selfies to friends, jokes about our sex life but he does have a very snobby and arrogant attitude and he thinks he's very hot. No saying he isn't.

He's a bit weird as he's always ignoring other people around him. Like he barely notices anybody except his friends. Everyone else just gets a "Hi" and he walks off. He also really prefers to be the centre of attention in any group meeting etc. Furthermore, he doesn't like to hear opposing views concerning anything he believes in. Anything opposing leads to arguments and fall outs. During our fights, he adopts a strong attitude, won't talk or listen and I have to make it up to him. He rarely will make up.

Also, in terms of social media, he posts about me/us on Facebook a lot. He added my mum and brother on Facebook a few days after he met them. He did the same with his friends brother. Added him too.
He also goes around writing things like "mine" on his guy friends pictures.

And even though we have the same group, he signs up for things/social causes himself and I do by myself.

In terms of couple looks, we are rarely genuinely complimented. Otherwise people just joke that we look like friends or siblings.
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Anonymous #1
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Ages - he's 23. I'm 25 turning 26 next month
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Anonymous #1
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Hi same anon asking does sex lead to emotional connection

Here's my full story



Moonlight rain GabiAbi84 Acknologia
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Anonymous #1
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anosmianAcrimony
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GabiAbi84
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi same anon asking does sex lead to emotional connection

Here's my full story



Moonlight rain GabiAbi84 Acknologia
What are you talking about?
Why are you tagging me?
Last edited by GabiAbi84; 1 month ago
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CaptainDuckie
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no offence but he seems annoying.. I would never get along with someone who hates to be challenged.

I would say that he might not notice he’s doing it.
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anosmianAcrimony
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Honestly, one of the most worrying things about all of this to me is that when you argue, he refuses to listen or talk properly and you always have to make it up to him. Communication and the ability to work out problems through talking and listening properly to the other person, are soooo important.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by GabiAbi84)
What are you talking about?
Why are you tagging me?
Need replies
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anosmianAcrimony
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To answer your original question, sex leads to emotional connection if a person wants that to happen and uses sex to learn about the other person - if they put effort into that. This guy does not seem to be putting effort into that.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by CaptainDuckie)
no offence but he seems annoying.. I would never get along with someone who hates to be challenged.

I would say that he might not notice he’s doing it.
No he knows it. He is just idk why.

(Original post by anosmianAcrimony)
To answer your original question, sex leads to emotional connection if a person wants that to happen and uses sex to learn about the other person - if they put effort into that. This guy does not seem to be putting effort into that.
But what about the pica as wallpapers and including everyone in my family?
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GabiAbi84
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(Original post by Anonymous)
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Don’t know what that has to do with me…

In short. If you’re happy, carry on. If you’re not, change something.
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anosmianAcrimony
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(Original post by Anonymous)
No he knows it. He is just idk why.


But what about the pica as wallpapers and including everyone in my family?
IMO, that doesn't mean much. Using a picture as a wallpaper and adding people on Facebook are cheap and low-effort things to do. If you feel unfulfilled in the relationship and as though he has not genuinely connected with you, that's much more meaningful.
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Final Fantasy
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Yes, one way or another, every relationship eventually ends.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by anosmianAcrimony)
IMO, that doesn't mean much. Using a picture as a wallpaper and adding people on Facebook are cheap and low-effort things to do. If you feel unfulfilled in the relationship and as though he has not genuinely connected with you, that's much more meaningful.
What is your opinion??? On the whole aspect???
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CaptainDuckie
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(Original post by Anonymous)
no he knows it

he’s just annoying then.

I would just say to see how things go over the next couple of weeks.

but I would highly suggest you call him out on his behaviours whenever he spits his dummy out.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by CaptainDuckie)
he’s just annoying then.

I would just say to see how things go over the next couple of weeks.

but I would highly suggest you call him out on his behaviours whenever he spits his dummy out.
Do you think this has the potential to last?
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CaptainDuckie
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Do you think this has the potential to last?

if he’s willing to actually accept he’s wrong sometimes and it’s all part of life to take losses

then maybe.

if not, it just starts becoming silly.
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anosmianAcrimony
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(Original post by GabiAbi84)
Don’t know what that has to do with me…

In short. If you’re happy, carry on. If you’re not, change something.
(Original post by Anonymous)
What is your opinion??? On the whole aspect???
It's not really for me to tell you how well your relationship is going.

Gabi sums it up pretty well. If you feel like you want more of an emotional connection, or there are ways he acts that make you unhappy, talk to him about those things. If he cares about you, he'll at least listen. If the talking is unproductive, get rid of him and find someone who is prepared to care about you and listen to you.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by anosmianAcrimony)
It's not really for me to tell you how well your relationship is going.

Gabi sums it up pretty well. If you feel like you want more of an emotional connection, or there are ways he acts that make you unhappy, talk to him about those things. If he cares about you, he'll at least listen. If the talking is unproductive, get rid of him and find someone who is prepared to care about you and listen to you.
You think inspired of sex we lack emotion?
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anosmianAcrimony
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(Original post by Anonymous)
You think inspired of sex we lack emotion?
What?
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