Anonymous #1
#1
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So I recently started talking to this lovely guy again, we didn’t talk for a month, because of myself tbh. I didn’t tell him it was because I was seeing someone else and then it sort of went pear shaped leaving me quite upset and maybe I approached him because I felt lonely and sad. However now I’m talking to him, he keeps telling me how much he missed me and how much he adores me, telling me that I mean the world to him, but I feel guilty for some reason.
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Sempai569
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#2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So I recently started talking to this lovely guy again, we didn’t talk for a month, because of myself tbh. I didn’t tell him it was because I was seeing someone else and then it sort of went pear shaped leaving me quite upset and maybe I approached him because I felt lonely and sad. However now I’m talking to him, he keeps telling me how much he missed me and how much he adores me, telling me that I mean the world to him, but I feel guilty for some reason.
You shouldn't feel guilty about how someone else feels about you, maybe just being honest and telling him you were in a relationship at the time will help? I don't know all the details for this situation at the moment so it's hard for me to give the best advice. It is also not quite fair for him to keep saying how much he adores you all the time unless you might feel something similar back.

If you want to elaborate I'm happy to listen and I'm also fine if you want to keep it to yourself.
I'm just trying to say that I'm happy to help if I can.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Sempai569)
You shouldn't feel guilty about how someone else feels about you, maybe just being honest and telling him you were in a relationship at the time will help? I don't know all the details for this situation at the moment so it's hard for me to give the best advice. It is also not quite fair for him to keep saying how much he adores you all the time unless you might feel something similar back.

If you want to elaborate I'm happy to listen and I'm also fine if you want to keep it to yourself.
I'm just trying to say that I'm happy to help if I can.
I feel guilty because I tell him the same things back, even if I’m not 100% sure I feel the same way. I did like him that way before, but my ex was so different, I was never shy in front of him and I could tell him anything, but it’s not the same with this guy. I mean he has really made me feel better after the break up because I’m not so upset anymore but I still miss my ex and wish I had him. The problem is I’ve always been more than friends with this guy but never actually a thing, if that makes sense. We casually flirt and do things together that friends wouldn’t but even now I’m not stopping myself, I feel like I’m just picking up were we left of, but for some reason I feel bad about it.
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Sempai569
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I feel guilty because I tell him the same things back, even if I’m not 100% sure I feel the same way. I did like him that way before, but my ex was so different, I was never shy in front of him and I could tell him anything, but it’s not the same with this guy. I mean he has really made me feel better after the break up because I’m not so upset anymore but I still miss my ex and wish I had him. The problem is I’ve always been more than friends with this guy but never actually a thing, if that makes sense. We casually flirt and do things together that friends wouldn’t but even now I’m not stopping myself, I feel like I’m just picking up were we left of, but for some reason I feel bad about it.
I have a better understanding now. You feel guilty because you tell him the same thing back but you're not sure if you do actually think about him the same way that he thinks of you. Although it might not end in the ideal way I myself would try and either come clean and tell them I'm not quite sure how I feel with the other option being to make it official so to speak. The feeling shy might not be a bad thing, bare in mind that I am a straight boy so things might be different, but I often feel very shy around my crush, I'm just good at hiding it. It also sounds like you feel that you're being pulled in two directions, you still have some feelings for your ex but you also possibly have feelings for this person? I think it's natural to still have some feelings for your ex but if things did finish between you I'd think that these feelings would begin to fade.

Does this help at all? I'm still happy to add more and help if I can so feel free to reply again if you need to.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Sempai569)
I have a better understanding now. You feel guilty because you tell him the same thing back but you're not sure if you do actually think about him the same way that he thinks of you. Although it might not end in the ideal way I myself would try and either come clean and tell them I'm not quite sure how I feel with the other option being to make it official so to speak. The feeling shy might not be a bad thing, bare in mind that I am a straight boy so things might be different, but I often feel very shy around my crush, I'm just good at hiding it. It also sounds like you feel that you're being pulled in two directions, you still have some feelings for your ex but you also possibly have feelings for this person? I think it's natural to still have some feelings for your ex but if things did finish between you I'd think that these feelings would begin to fade.

Does this help at all? I'm still happy to add more and help if I can so feel free to reply again if you need to.
Thanks for your advice.
I’m not sure what to say because I don’t want to talk about my ex, we broke up because of the distance between us. I don’t want to tell him for some reason, even I don’t know?!
The guy I’m confused about is extremely sweet, caring and also shy. I’m not usually shy but I’m also not able to declare my feelings. He’s never really had a girlfriend before so I don’t want to spoil his first relationship if I don’t actually like him back, like he does me.
Whenever I think my feelings are fading for my ex, I remember him, and just fall back.. i don’t know to be honest.
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Surnia
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#6
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You should feel.guilty because you're using a 'lovely guy' as a rebound and got involved with him again because you were lonely; those are not reasons to be flirting or getting physical as you are leading him on.

It also sounds like it's too soon if it was only a month ago that you broke up with someone else. You need to give yourself time to get over your ex and do the decent thing by someone who does not deserve to be messed around.
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Sempai569
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#7
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Thanks for your advice.
I’m not sure what to say because I don’t want to talk about my ex, we broke up because of the distance between us. I don’t want to tell him for some reason, even I don’t know?!
The guy I’m confused about is extremely sweet, caring and also shy. I’m not usually shy but I’m also not able to declare my feelings. He’s never really had a girlfriend before so I don’t want to spoil his first relationship if I don’t actually like him back, like he does me.
Whenever I think my feelings are fading for my ex, I remember him, and just fall back.. i don’t know to be honest.
I'm in a bit of a situation myself where I was really confused but at the moment I'm half way through a week long family holiday and I'm just taking a step back, limiting how much time I spend on my phone and just taking the time to think about how I feel towards different people. My best advice at this point would be to just take a step back from things and ponder long and hard about your feelings for this guy and decide whether you do really like him back. Also take the time to recover from your last relationship to avoid this guy feeling like a plan b. If he is actually your plan b this will lead to lots of trouble and possible pain for both parties, this could also happen if you don't actually like him as you could end up leading him on. As I said my best advice would be to take a break from it all and decide if you do actually like him and decide what you want to do.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Sempai569)
I'm in a bit of a situation myself where I was really confused but at the moment I'm half way through a week long family holiday and I'm just taking a step back, limiting how much time I spend on my phone and just taking the time to think about how I feel towards different people. My best advice at this point would be to just take a step back from things and ponder long and hard about your feelings for this guy and decide whether you do really like him back. Also take the time to recover from your last relationship to avoid this guy feeling like a plan b. If he is actually your plan b this will lead to lots of trouble and possible pain for both parties, this could also happen if you don't actually like him as you could end up leading him on. As I said my best advice would be to take a break from it all and decide if you do actually like him and decide what you want to do.
I think that’s the best idea, to take a break from it all. Then see what happens.
Thanks for your help.
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