Why doesn't everyone just marry their first love?

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tierny3
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Something that is absolutely fudged in life is that:

suppose you're 18 and fall for someone properly, like proper first love. It breaks down for one reason or another. A few years go by, you go from girl to girl (vice versa..im a guy) and end up marrying someone. Most marriages dont have the same love as you had for your first love and you probably dont love your spouse as much as your first love to the extent that if your first love every came back, theoretically, you'd drop everything for them. Isn't that unfair to your spouse?
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Satori Tendō
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Speak for yourself
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by tierny3)
Something that is absolutely fudged in life is that:

suppose you're 18 and fall for someone properly, like proper first love. It breaks down for one reason or another. A few years go by, you go from girl to girl (vice versa..im a guy) and end up marrying someone. Most marriages dont have the same love as you had for your first love and you probably dont love your spouse as much as your first love to the extent that if your first love every came back, theoretically, you'd drop everything for them. Isn't that unfair to your spouse?
Ofc they don't, but you build on your marriage. Besides, no-one really gets over their first love. And I guess, love is a two way street, they gotta love you back.
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tierny3
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(Original post by Satori Tendō)
Speak for yourself
im not married but ouch
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tierny3
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Ofc they don't, but you build on your marriage. Besides, no-one really gets over their first love. And I guess, love is a two way street, they gotta love you back.
Yup I agree. I can't imagine loving my future wife as much but I may be pleasantly surprised!
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ROTL94
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Ofc they don't, but you build on your marriage. Besides, no-one really gets over their first love. And I guess, love is a two way street, they gotta love you back.
I have, don't even give her a thought now and when I do I feel nothing, so I don't think that's a universal fact.
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gjd800
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(Original post by ROTL94)
I have, don't even give her a thought now and when I do I feel nothing, so I don't think that's a universal fact.
Yep, same
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tierny3
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(Original post by ROTL94)
I have, don't even give her a thought now and when I do I feel nothing, so I don't think that's a universal fact.
how long has it been
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ROTL94
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(Original post by tierny3)
how long has it been
8 years since we split, after a 4 year long relationship.
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tierny3
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(Original post by ROTL94)
8 years since we split, after a 4 year long relationship.
have you been in a relationship ever since? did that help?
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Napp
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Well first implies there will be others, why waste the time and money if you know youll have 2nd and 3rd loves down the track?

Nevermind not all people want to get married...?

Or, lastly, not all people are stupid enough to marry their first girlfriend from highschool. Marriage, supposedly at least, is meant to be a big commitment, not some flippant irrelevance anyone does for the hell of it - even if it is heading tat way.
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tierny3
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(Original post by Napp)
Well first implies there will be others, why waste the time and money if you know youll have 2nd and 3rd loves down the track?

Nevermind not all people want to get married...?

Or, lastly, not all people are stupid enough to marry their first girlfriend from highschool. Marriage, supposedly at least, is meant to be a big commitment, not some flippant irrelevance anyone does for the hell of it - even if it is heading tat way.
I dont mean marry straight away...I mean when you get married ultimately get married to them
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Napp
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Ofc they don't, but you build on your marriage. Besides, no-one really gets over their first love. And I guess, love is a two way street, they gotta love you back.
Says who..?
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The_Lonely_Goatherd
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I agree that I'm unlikely to ever love anyone again the way I did my "first love". That said, my "first love" was already married to someone else when I met her, didn't treat me well, and didn't feel the same way about me the way I did her! So not loving someone the way I did her, can only be a good thing for me, tbh. I don't particularly want to repeat that experience!
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ROTL94
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(Original post by tierny3)
have you been in a relationship ever since? did that help?
I have yeah, been in a couple of long term relationships since. I'd be f'n miserable now if I married my teenage girlfirend, I know that for a fact.
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gjd800
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(Original post by ROTL94)
I have yeah, been in a couple of long term relationships since. I'd be f'n miserable now if I married my teenage girlfirend, I know that for a fact.
I'd probably be dead, mine drove me to drink at the best of times
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tierny3
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(Original post by ROTL94)
I have yeah, been in a couple of long term relationships since. I'd be f'n miserable now if I married my teenage girlfirend, I know that for a fact.
My point isnt to marry straight away, that would be difficult.

Stevie G shouldn't of have stayed at Liverpool his whole life, he should of have left after 2005, went to Chelsea/RM etc etc, realised Liverpool was his true love and came back in 2014 to win the league (and hopefully wouldn't slip).
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ROTL94
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(Original post by gjd800)
I'd probably be dead, mine drove me to drink at the best of times
Yeah, know the feeling, toward the end she was getting involved in all kinds of dodgy things that I didn't apporve of and wanted no part in like hard drugs e.g. speed. So I'd probably be visiting her in prison or in mourning of her loss if she OD'd.
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gjd800
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(Original post by tierny3)
My point isnt to marry straight away, that would be difficult.

Stevie G shouldn't of have stayed at Liverpool his whole life, he should of have left after 2005, went to Chelsea/RM etc etc, realised Liverpool was his true love and came back in 2014 to win the league (and hopefully wouldn't slip).
haha

we wouldn't have had him back if he went, especially to that lot at the bridge
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Napp
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(Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
I agree that I'm unlikely to ever love anyone again the way I did my "first love". That said, my "first love" was already married to someone else when I met her, didn't treat me well, and didn't feel the same way about me the way I did her! So not loving someone the way I did her, can only be a good thing for me, tbh. I don't particularly want to repeat that experience!
As in this was an affair or?!
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