How should I be around a girl?Watch
I can't say I went on dates. I asked someone out some months ago and we went on a ride with my car, stopped in a quiet place and started talking about... I don't know... stuff. But I felt like I wasn't myself. I somehow felt that I "tried" to sound interesting, or to always give the "proper" answer, the one that "should" somehow "satisfy" her. Or sometimes I just tried to be "funny". That's my "defense system": when you can't handle a proper conversation because of the anxiety, try to do some jokes, or transform everything into a joke.
Okay, the "date?" went decent but didn't talk to her that much since then. Now, she asked me if I want to join her at some concert and I said yes. The problem is, I'm really anxious. I'm afraid I'm just going to sit there and look at her and not say or do anything. I'm afraid I'm going to "force" some subject to talk about and become boring.
I can't call myself "socially awkward". I've got a lot of friends and most of them think I'm a great person. I can be a good listener and help them with their problems, be them emotional or of some other nature.
The problem is, I always try to "impress", mostly when I'm around girls. I just imagine "what should I do now?", "When should I try to kiss her?" or "Should I even think about kissing her?". When I meet someone that's nice to me I usually think "Is she interested into me?" and then I get emotionally attached to that person.
How can I change this? What should I do in this case? (If the answer is going to be some kind of "just be yourself" - please argue why).
Also, I'm a very disorganized person (mostly because of my anxiety issues and my neurotic personality - in general). I think this also has somehow an "impact" on what I mentioned before.
It seems like you arent very experienced with girls and put them above you as tho you were the one who needs to impress her and she just decides if you are good enough. You need to remember it is not a one way street. She is probably just as stressed and the same things go through her own mind. We girls are people too and stress about how we look and behave before or during dates. If you have female friends look at your interactions with them. When you dont approach a girl with the intention to impress her are you this nervous too? My guess is that you then act much more natural. Dont try to impress a girl try to have fun 😄
As a girl it worked for me. Never had a boyfriend but the several times i went out with a guy i had a lot of fun and that what dates are for right? To have fun with that person. Good luck 😊