Are you missing out if you haven't had a lot of sexual experiences?

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Anonymous #1
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I know females my age (20) who have sex with people of all ages above the legal age. So men in their 20s, 30s, 40s, and 50s and I have only had 1 sexual partner. I am not a highly sexual person but I feel like I might be missing out on the sexual connection, the friendships, the experimenting with kinks, the networking maybe, role play, all those other adventurous things in bed, going out to seduce men, flirting, the sex itself (the emotions connected to this like the adrenaline rush, the lust, the satisfaction, lowkey desperation etc). The thrill of your intimate relationships, sometimes the debatable sex too like doing it with your exs dad, or your boss etc. Being able to meet people of all ages, get to know them, have sex with people who have different experience levels, that whole experience, learn from them, for a connection with them that is more than just strictly a friendship.

Even the emotional connection part like the fun dates, the breakfast in bed, and just getting to know someone.

Again, I am not in the right circumstance to have many sexual parters or go on lots of dates and meet people. It's to do with my mental health.

But am I missing out on this?

Do people who actually have this lifestyle do it for the moment and then forget it later or move on? Like in 10 years from now, would this all matter? Is it just for the experience?

Someone people answer all these questions
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Anonymous #1
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londonmyst
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It depends upon your individual lifestyle preferences, personal values and relationship ambitions.

I'm only attracted to much older guys and have been ever since I started dating at 16.
I've never dated a guy in his 20s or the same age as me and never would.
During my dating years, I gained a lot of life experience and accumulated some amazing memories.
Both of which have been very helpful in creating and editing my very long list of dating dealbreakers.
These days aged 26 I'm happily single, live alone and I've moved on.
Shifted my focus to improving my finances, adding to my postgrad collection, widening my skillset, adding to my contacts books and working towards other ambitions.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by londonmyst)
It depends upon your individual lifestyle preferences, personal values and relationship ambitions.

I'm only attracted to much older guys and have been ever since I started dating at 16.
I've never dated a guy in his 20s or the same age as me and never would.
During my dating years, I gained a lot of life experience and accumulated some amazing memories.
Both of which have been very helpful in creating and editing my very long list of dating dealbreakers.
These days aged 26 I'm happily single, live alone and I've moved on.
Shifted my focus to improving my finances, adding to my postgrad collection, widening my skillset, adding to my contacts books and working towards other ambitions.
When you said accumulating amazing memories. What do you mean by that?
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londonmyst
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(Original post by Anonymous)
When you said accumulating amazing memories. What do you mean by that?
None of the relationships worked out but so many of the memories were fabulous.
During my last relationship, I lived with the ex and his gorgeous leonberger girl in a penthouse apartment for a year.
The circumstances that resulted in the breakup were very sordid.
But during the 2 years that we were together I learned so many great recipes from the usa and so much from him & his social circle.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by londonmyst)
None of the relationships worked out but so many of the memories were fabulous.
During my last relationship, I lived with the ex and his gorgeous leonberger girl in a penthouse apartment for a year.
The circumstances that resulted in the breakup were very sordid.
But during the 2 years that we were together I learned so many great recipes from the usa and so much from him & his social circle.
Did you learn anything useful that you would apply to your own life?
What was it like living in a penthouse?
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Satori Tendō
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I feel like you can answer your own question best. Are these the types of experiences you wish to have in the first place? If you are not having them, does that make you feel incomplete? Is it right for you?

For me, everything you listed is something I'd rather die before doing so from my point of view I don't see anything to be missing out on at all lol
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I know females my age (20) who have sex with people of all ages above the legal age. So men in their 20s, 30s, 40s, and 50s and I have only had 1 sexual partner. I am not a highly sexual person but I feel like I might be missing out on the sexual connection, the friendships, the experimenting with kinks, the networking maybe, role play, all those other adventurous things in bed, going out to seduce men, flirting, the sex itself (the emotions connected to this like the adrenaline rush, the lust, the satisfaction, lowkey desperation etc). The thrill of your intimate relationships, sometimes the debatable sex too like doing it with your exs dad, or your boss etc. Being able to meet people of all ages, get to know them, have sex with people who have different experience levels, that whole experience, learn from them, for a connection with them that is more than just strictly a friendship.

Even the emotional connection part like the fun dates, the breakfast in bed, and just getting to know someone.

Again, I am not in the right circumstance to have many sexual parters or go on lots of dates and meet people. It's to do with my mental health.

But am I missing out on this?

Do people who actually have this lifestyle do it for the moment and then forget it later or move on? Like in 10 years from now, would this all matter? Is it just for the experience?

Someone people answer all these questions
To be I am a in the same situation as a 21 year of guy however I want to wait for the right person . Personally I would be able to get a casual relationships because of being well endowed but personally I don't see that as a way to live in my opinion . So what I am saying i would say wait for the right person meaning someone good for your mental health. Your not really missing out like sure your not having some romantic experiences however you can have them at any time. In terms of the third question i think from people i know it can either become a lifestyle that eventually leads to some kind of breakdown or they tend to move into more committed relationships at some point.
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ROTL94
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Missing out on the clap, yes but not on anything that actually matters. When you meet and have regular sex with someone you love your lack of experience won't matter.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Satori Tendō)
I feel like you can answer your own question best. Are these the types of experiences you wish to have in the first place? If you are not having them, does that make you feel incomplete? Is it right for you?

For me, everything you listed is something I'd rather die before doing so from my point of view I don't see anything to be missing out on at all lol
Yh I am starting to realise that too. I'm not sure I am a fan of sleeping with older men just because a handful of girls I heard of were doing this. I am also aware that this lifestyle might lead to STDs.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by ROTL94)
Missing out on the clap, yes but not on anything that actually matters. When you meet and have regular sex with someone you love your lack of experience won't matter.
Yes I agree. This is what I am going to do.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
To be I am a in the same situation as a 21 year of guy however I want to wait for the right person . Personally I would be able to get a casual relationships because of being well endowed but personally I don't see that as a way to live in my opinion . So what I am saying i would say wait for the right person meaning someone good for your mental health. Your not really missing out like sure your not having some romantic experiences however you can have them at any time. In terms of the third question i think from people i know it can either become a lifestyle that eventually leads to some kind of breakdown or they tend to move into more committed relationships at some point.
Same I don't think casual sex, multiple relationships etc is for me.
I am thinking of waiting for the right one to be sexually intimate with and someone closer to my own age.
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Anonymous #3
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honestly no for me because most of those encounters were awkward or even tr*aumatic, and attempts to experiment or try out fantasies were just much more disappointing in reality. I also learned my reasons for doing them were questionable as were the motivations of the guys in doing these things too.

What is important is your own drive and if there are negative consequences for your mental health or physical wellbeing by not fulfiling your basic sexual needs.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
honestly no for me because most of those encounters were awkward or even tr*aumatic, and attempts to experiment or try out fantasies were just much more disappointing in reality. I also learned my reasons for doing them were questionable as were the motivations of the guys in doing these things too.

What is important is your own drive and if there are negative consequences for your mental health or physical wellbeing by not fulfiling your basic sexual needs.
Yh I think for me I am not interested in the sexual part. I think I am just lonely and crave friendship. Older guys aren't my thing.
I also agree with what you said here. I do not want to have the regret later and the trauma.

What you said here is so important and something I am realising now. I am glad I didn't jump into anything.

Thank you for replying
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by londonmyst)
None of the relationships worked out but so many of the memories were fabulous.
During my last relationship, I lived with the ex and his gorgeous leonberger girl in a penthouse apartment for a year.
The circumstances that resulted in the breakup were very sordid.
But during the 2 years that we were together I learned so many great recipes from the usa and so much from him & his social circle.
I also, in 10 years from now, would this all matter? Is it just for the experience?
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Same I don't think casual sex, multiple relationships etc is for me.
I am thinking of waiting for the right one to be sexually intimate with and someone closer to my own age.
Yeah the emotional side of relationships is very important or even more important than the physical side so yeah its a good idea to wait at least I would say.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeah the emotional side of relationships is very important or even more important than the physical side so yeah its a good idea to wait at least I would say.
thank you
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Joleee
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no, you're not missing out. if you were missing out that would mean 90% of the population are missing out cuz 90% of the population doesn't have sex in the way you described in your op :nah:

what you have described is some kind of niche group of people who enjoy that lifestyle, but i mean if you (!) think you need that experience to live a complete life then go for it. just don't think it's common to meet some random person and perform all these kinks or sleep with your boss or your ex's dad, or someone more than twice your age and you're the odd man out; most people aren't that exciting.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Joleee)
no, you're not missing out. if you were missing out that would mean 90% of the population are missing out cuz 90% of the population doesn't have sex in the way you described in your op :nah:

what you have described is some kind of niche group of people who enjoy that lifestyle, but i mean if you (!) think you need that experience to live a complete life then go for it. just don't think it's common to meet some random person and perform all these kinks or sleep with your boss or your ex's dad, or someone more than twice your age and you're the odd man out; most people aren't that exciting.
Yes I Agree thank you
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