My mums slut shaming me even though I’m a Virgin

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Evelyn_L
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My mum called me a slut.I’ve been in a long distance relationship for 4 months now with my boyfriend. We’re both 20 years old and have finally in this past month been able to go on 4 dates and spend time together. We were meant to be going for a night away this weekend which I talked to my mum about as I still live with my parents who are extremely religious in the Christian faith. The initial conversation went well, supportive, open and comfortable. Upon discussing it later after my mum had told my dad she got very upset, telling me she was as hurt and disappointed. That I was cheapening myself and didn’t realise the damage I was causing myself for later years. That my boyfriend wasn’t who she thought he was as he was now not respecting me or their views. After telling my mum I accepted that we had different beliefs and opinions she still tried to blackmail me into doing what she wanted and even called me a slut. I’ve never felt so hurt in my life. I don’t share their religious views and have always felt trapped in their majorly narrow mindsets. If I go with my boyfriend I feel like my relationship with my mum will be ruined forever. What do I do? Please please send advice I feel so sad and alone.
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Anonymous #1
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Your mum is throwing around hurtful words, blackmailing you, and being completely disrespectful of you and your choices. You’re 20, you’re not a child anymore. She’s completely out of order here imo.
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YaliaV123
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Your mum is ruining the relationship and you haven’t done anything wrong. Would it be possible for you to move out? You can’t let her control your life.
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Zarek
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For me it would be time to break free of repressive hypocritical religion. I imagine she’ll get over it.
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Justvisited
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(Original post by YaliaV123)
Your mum is ruining the relationship and you haven’t done anything wrong. Would it be possible for you to move out? You can’t let her control your life.
Parents are always wrong on TSR
(Original post by Zarek)
For me it would be time to break free of repressive hypocritical religion. I imagine she’ll get over it.
What's hypocritical here?
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YaliaV123
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(Original post by Justvisited)
What's hypocritical here?
Do you have anything constructive to add? I thought not.
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Zarek
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(Original post by Justvisited)
What's hypocritical here?
Insulting your daughter in this offensive way isn’t true to Christian principles of love and tolerance in my book
Last edited by Zarek; 1 month ago
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anosmianAcrimony
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You owe it to yourself to live your life in a rich and full way. If your mum is going to ruin your relationship over this, your relationship was always "pre-ruined"; this was going to happen sooner or later.
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mathperson
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(Original post by Evelyn_L)
My mum called me a slut.I’ve been in a long distance relationship for 4 months now with my boyfriend. We’re both 20 years old and have finally in this past month been able to go on 4 dates and spend time together. We were meant to be going for a night away this weekend which I talked to my mum about as I still live with my parents who are extremely religious in the Christian faith. The initial conversation went well, supportive, open and comfortable. Upon discussing it later after my mum had told my dad she got very upset, telling me she was as hurt and disappointed. That I was cheapening myself and didn’t realise the damage I was causing myself for later years. That my boyfriend wasn’t who she thought he was as he was now not respecting me or their views. After telling my mum I accepted that we had different beliefs and opinions she still tried to blackmail me into doing what she wanted and even called me a slut. I’ve never felt so hurt in my life. I don’t share their religious views and have always felt trapped in their majorly narrow mindsets. If I go with my boyfriend I feel like my relationship with my mum will be ruined forever. What do I do? Please please send advice I feel so sad and alone.
Reading between the lines it seems that your mum might be upset because your boyfriend isn't a christian?
Apologies if I've got that wrong - I've bolded the parts in the quote above to highlight why I was led to think this.

It is against the christian faith to be in a relationship with another person who is not christian. Obviously, it's about control and dogma.

Frankly, I wouldn't allow a couple of religious freaks to rule my life. Let them advise you, by all means, and listen to their advice if it's sound advice and not just religious dogma, but don't allow them to put you into a weird mental space where their religion rules your life.
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