Do students ever truly get over their Oxbridge rejection?

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Do students ever truly get over their Oxbridge rejection?
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The Malevolent
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As an offer holder from Cambridge, I hope this thread doesn't make me feel too bad lol
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4D Chess
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Do students ever truly get over their Oxbridge rejection?
Yes. I narrowly missed my Cambridge Maths offer by one very very very very very very very very very dumb mistake I made on a 9am exam which I couldn't sleep before doing and was pretty tired during it. Since I did maths, I was still very likely to get in through the Summer pool (I'd give it like an 80% chance). I instantly stopped caring when I got my summer pool rejection letter cos I thought "Warwick is probably more fun anyways" which I feel like is probably what a lot of people think? Although then again, first year at Warwick ended up being extremely horrible :emo: so I've taken a fat L once again

I should probably also add that pretty much nearly everyone I've heard of at Warwick who was rejected just laughed it off I guess. Those who didn't though, I think it's okay to feel very disappointed for the rejection, if you truly felt like you would've had a better time/education there.
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ROTL94
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I'm sure the mentally healthy ones do.
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3344somebody
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(Original post by 4D Chess)
Yes. I narrowly missed my Cambridge Maths offer by ONE very very very very very very very very very dumb mistake I made on a 9am exam which I couldn't sleep before doing and was pretty tired during it. Since I did maths, I was still very likely to get in through the Summer pool (I'd give it like an 80% chance). I instantly stopped caring when I got my summer pool rejection letter cos I thought "Warwick is probably more fun anyways" which I feel like is probably what a lot of people think? Although then again, first year at Warwick ended up being extremely horrible :emo: so I've taken a fat L once again

I should probably also add that pretty much nearly everyone I've heard of at Warwick who was rejected just laughed it off I guess. Those who didn't though, I think it's okay to feel very disappointed for the rejection, if you truly felt like you would've had a better time/education there.
Can I ask why it was extremely horrible at Warwick?
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gjd800
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Normal people do
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by 4D Chess)
Yes. I narrowly missed my Cambridge Maths offer by ONE very very very very very very very very very dumb mistake I made on a 9am exam which I couldn't sleep before doing and was pretty tired during it. Since I did maths, I was still very likely to get in through the Summer pool (I'd give it like an 80% chance). I instantly stopped caring when I got my summer pool rejection letter cos I thought "Warwick is probably more fun anyways" which I feel like is probably what a lot of people think? Although then again, first year at Warwick ended up being extremely horrible :emo: so I've taken a fat L once again

I should probably also add that pretty much nearly everyone I've heard of at Warwick who was rejected just laughed it off I guess. Those who didn't though, I think it's okay to feel very disappointed for the rejection, if you truly felt like you would've had a better time/education there.
Isn't Warwick just as hard to get into for Maths?
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The Malevolent
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Isn't Warwick just as hard to get into for Maths?
Not really, no. Other than Oxbridge, Warwick probably has higher entry requirements than any other university in the UK, at least in my experience (My offer was 3A*s). Cambridge however also requires the so called STEP exams, which are very, very hard compared to A levels. These are the reason most offer-holders miss their offer. Warwick also accepts STEP exams, but requires a much lower grade than Cambridge.

EDIT: I'm referring to mathematics only. For other subjects things might be different.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by The Malevolent)
Not really, no. Other than Oxbridge, Warwick probably has higher entry requirements than any other university in the UK, at least in my experience (My offer was 3A*s). Cambridge however also requires the so called STEP exams, which are very, very hard compared to A levels. These are the reason most offer-holders miss their offer. Warwick also accepts STEP exams, but requires a much lower grade than Cambridge.

EDIT: I'm referring to mathematics only. For other subjects things might be different.
What would happen if Warwick matched Oxbridge for entry requirements like for like? Would students buy into the idea that the standards of the course would be the same as at Oxbridge?
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The Malevolent
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(Original post by Anonymous)
What would happen if Warwick matched Oxbridge for entry requirements like for like? Would students buy into the idea that the standards of the course would be the same as at Oxbridge?
A change in entry requirements would have to come alongside a more demanding course to warrant such a response from the students. And it would probably take some time for the narrative to change. Oxbridge has built a reputation for being the best over centuries, so you can't expect a change in perception to take place overnight. Other than that, I don't really know. It's quite a hypothetical question.
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Interea
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(Original post by 4D Chess)
Yes. I narrowly missed my Cambridge Maths offer by ONE very very very very very very very very very dumb mistake I made on a 9am exam which I couldn't sleep before doing and was pretty tired during it. Since I did maths, I was still very likely to get in through the Summer pool (I'd give it like an 80% chance). I instantly stopped caring when I got my summer pool rejection letter cos I thought "Warwick is probably more fun anyways" which I feel like is probably what a lot of people think? Although then again, first year at Warwick ended up being extremely horrible :emo: so I've taken a fat L once again

I should probably also add that pretty much nearly everyone I've heard of at Warwick who was rejected just laughed it off I guess. Those who didn't though, I think it's okay to feel very disappointed for the rejection, if you truly felt like you would've had a better time/education there.
Haha it's fun reading what is going to be my exact thought process in 9 days (I'll be a little less of a close call than you were though!)

I think for maths it's easier to get past the Oxbridge thing because Warwick and Imperial both also have those really good reputations, while both being a fair bit easier to get the grades for (only a 2 in a single STEP paper for Imperial, and the ability to bypass STEP completely by just getting an extra A* or doing a fourth A level for Warwick). My friends who applied for things like Classics definitely had a harder time getting over it, since they're viewed as such stereotypical Oxbridge courses that anywhere else feels (wrongly) like a major downgrade by default. Having such a stressful year of online learning has made them really appreciate the normally less stressful environments of other unis though, so they're pretty over it by now!

I'm sorry to hear you had a rough year at Warwick though, hopefully it improves :console:
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I didn't get into Durham, and just accepted it. I very, very rarely think about it at all.

There have been many, many disappointments in my life (not just the university one). To maintain our sanity, we all need to accept failure and move on.

My failures actually led me onto TSR, so that is no bad thing at all.
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Wired_1800
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Do students ever truly get over their Oxbridge rejection?
i think some people don't because they have placed Oxbridge on pedestal and the stigma attached to being a “reject”. It is perfectly fine to feel bad from a rejection but allowing it to become part of your personality many months or years afterwards is idiocy to me.

I see it the same as applying for a job maybe in Finance and being rejected by Goldman Sachs and carrying it around you as a ‘Goldman reject’. Most people would find the person to be stupid with potentially low IQ.
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Cambridge rejected me post-interview. Took me a few months to get over it but I eventually did. My then-bf was accepted tho so I was vicariously living out my ‘Oxbridge dream’ through him. Not very healthy in retrospect. 😂
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by Wired_1800)
i think some people don't because they have placed Oxbridge on pedestal and the stigma attached to being a “reject”. It is perfectly fine to feel bad from a rejection but allowing it to become part of your personality many months or years afterwards is idiocy to me.

I see it the same as applying for a job maybe in Finance and being rejected by Goldman Sachs and carrying it around you as a ‘Goldman reject’. Most people would find the person to be stupid with potentially low IQ.
I guess this goes with the territory of being young and idealistic and being told, via Disney films and the like, that your dreams can come true. It's just not always possible, particularly if the next person is hungrier for success, puts in a monumental effort, does research, makes sure they get contacts.
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Kogomogo
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I was rejected from oxford around 10 years ago for biology, after getting 2 interviews and getting my hopes up. I was upset for a couple weeks maybe, but once i got my other uni place sorted and started settling in there i was ok. I think it helps i never really had any pressure to go there by parents or anything, i only applied because my college said i'd have a shot.

For a few years i'd occassionally wonder 'what if' i'd gone there. Now though i'm actually glad i didn't get in, as i've come to learn more about how oxford works i realise it wouldn't have been a good uni for me. I only applied because of it's reputation, and I've heard enough about the atmosphere and teaching style there that i don't think i'd have thrived.
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Wired_1800
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
I guess this goes with the territory of being young and idealistic and being told, via Disney films and the like, that your dreams can come true. It's just not always possible, particularly if the next person is hungrier for success, puts in a monumental effort, does research, makes sure they get contacts.
I agree with you. I recognise that it is fine to hold such dreams as a young person. At such an elite level whether at Oxbridge, Imperial, UCL or top American universities, the room for error is tiny and many excellent people sadly miss out. This is similar to the Olympics where the 4th placed finisher would feel like a failure but is arguably one of the best athletes on the planet.

I think the Oxbridge rejection stigma needs to be addressed. Oxbridge does not exist in a vacuum imho and is similar level to other excellent institutions including Imperial, UCL, Durham, Edinburgh etc.
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The_Lonely_Goatherd
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(Original post by Wired_1800)
i think some people don't because they have placed Oxbridge on pedestal and the stigma attached to being a “reject”. It is perfectly fine to feel bad from a rejection but allowing it to become part of your personality many months or years afterwards is idiocy to me.

I see it the same as applying for a job maybe in Finance and being rejected by Goldman Sachs and carrying it around you as a ‘Goldman reject’. Most people would find the person to be stupid with potentially low IQ.
Ah you said what I was meaning to say, except you did it far more eloquently/succinctly
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by Wired_1800)
I agree with you. I recognise that it is fine to hold such dreams as a young person. At such an elite level whether at Oxbridge, Imperial, UCL or top American universities, the room for error is tiny and many excellent people sadly miss out. This is similar to the Olympics where the 4th placed finisher would feel like a failure but is arguably one of the best athletes on the planet.

I think the Oxbridge rejection stigma needs to be addressed. Oxbridge does not exist in a vacuum imho and is similar level to other excellent institutions including Imperial, UCL, Durham, Edinburgh etc.
I compare it to the mirror of Erised in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. You look in the mirror and see what you most once, but sitting in front of that mirror will drive you mad and you may never get your heart's desire. This has been addressed again and again by me, but even though I and others say it is not the be all and end of the world, the students don't see this as a consolation.
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
I guess this goes with the territory of being young and idealistic and being told, via Disney films and the like, that your dreams can come true. It's just not always possible, particularly if the next person is hungrier for success, puts in a monumental effort, does research, makes sure they get contacts.
The reason i can't get over it is that i was pooled (not successful) but in my at interview test reading i was rly ill (sinuses) and couldnt focus on the reading. So i did badly on my test could only answer 3/6 and got 6 on my interview score. Whereas the second interview at same college was score of 8/10 because i had no more symptoms by then. I just ask myself what if i let them know i was ill during reading or that i managed to qualify for BMO2 after interview. I went in preparing with minimum effort thinking that if i don't get in ill be less disappointed than someone who really tried but looking back i definitely should have spent more than 3 weeks preparing.
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