I have my first ever date this weekend and I’m scared as hell

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Billycatnorbert
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I don’t think she’s calling it a date. We’ve never met irl, the most we’ve done is video call, but I’m almost certain that she wants to be friends… and that’s it. I’m hoping to change her mind but I’m also scared. We’re both socially awkward and nervous about meeting up. We’re going to the city and I’m trying to plan a few fun things for us to do.
Any advice on not hating myself, not being scared or even changing her mind? Any help would be amazing 😭
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Dunnig Kruger
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Change her mood, not her mind.

It's fine to be nervous. You've never done it before. You'd have to be the most thick skulled over-confident person in the world not to be nervous.

If you focus on her comfort and enjoyment, that should help with your nerves, once the date has started. And the more she's enjoying herself, the more you should too.

Keep an open mind.

And have the mindset that as long as you are both enjoying yourselves, that's the main thing. Even if the outcome is that you never see each other again.

Aim to take the lead. And to be a good leader.

Aim to have one or a series of 40 to 90 minute dates. Don't spend too long at any one place / activity. Going on multiple consecutive dates in one day is OK. As is having just the 1 date and parting.

Aim to finish the date on a high. Like the end of 1 episode of a TV series, where the audience is left pining for the next installment.

Thank her for the date - eg by a phone call the day after the date.

Stay positive and upbeat. Keep things light and fun and flirty.
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Billycatnorbert
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(Original post by Dunnig Kruger)
Change her mood, not her mind.

It's fine to be nervous. You've never done it before. You'd have to be the most thick skulled over-confident person in the world not to be nervous.

If you focus on her comfort and enjoyment, that should help with your nerves, once the date has started. And the more she's enjoying herself, the more you should too.

Keep an open mind.

And have the mindset that as long as you are both enjoying yourselves, that's the main thing. Even if the outcome is that you never see each other again.

Aim to take the lead. And to be a good leader.

Aim to have one or a series of 40 to 90 minute dates. Don't spend too long at any one place / activity. Going on multiple consecutive dates in one day is OK. As is having just the 1 date and parting.

Aim to finish the date on a high. Like the end of 1 episode of a TV series, where the audience is left pining for the next installment.

Thank her for the date - eg by a phone call the day after the date.

Stay positive and upbeat. Keep things light and fun and flirty.
This is the most useful advice I’ve ever had ever. Thank you so much. You seem quite experienced. Would you wanna talk in PMs by any chance?
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Surnia
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You should find out beforehand how she sees things. You don't know her very well if you aren't even sure if she wants to date you!

The whole point of dating is to get to know each other better, with a view to a relationship. Maybe you should have gone for something more lowkey and not lots of activities, because talking face-to-face is very different to video calling, and you need to opportunity to read the body language and also see how someone interacts with other people; there's a saying that a good way to judge someone is how they trear staff in a restaurant!
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Justvisited
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(Original post by Dunnig Kruger)
Aim to take the lead. And to be a good leader.
Advice not scalable...
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