What should I do to get over this?

****** situation here:

Started uni a month ago, and pretty soon on I really started liking this girl I met randomly here. We're not in the same hall or on the same course. We started meeting up quite a lot (usually with other people though) and I really started falling in love with her. I'm sure it sounds pathetic but there you go.

We got on really well and started flirting quite a bit, but she seemed to start sending me mixed messages a bit. This is where it gets weird - I added her on Facebook and her profile really makes it look like she's a lesbian. Not straight out saying it, but lots of hints. So I came to terms with that, accepted it, backed off a bit, y'know.

Well pretty soon after she hooked up with some other guy in her hall, turns out she's not a lesbian after all! I still see her occasionally and I really like her as a friend but whenever I go on her profile there's not-so-subtle status updates about what they've been up to etc, and pictures of them together, and it just hurts like hell.

I bet this all sounds pathetic. It's just so hard because I thought we were on the verge of something special and it's been totally stripped away from me. I know it's really my fault for getting my hopes up and thinking what we had was more special than she evidently did.

I don't want to cut off contact because I like her a lot as a friend as I said, but I find myself looking at her profile a lot and just finding out more and more stuff that I really don't want to. Ignorance would have been bliss.

Any tips on what to do now?

Reply 1

aMAXin

lol what were the hints at lesbianism?

Reply 2

Jon7

What the hell mate - there were some indefinite proofs of lesbianism and you backed off?! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

Look, to be fair I shoulkd have expected some flak over this, but there's no point me going into more detail about the lesbian thing, it's totally irrelevant at this point to be honest.

Jon7

WHAT WERE YOU THINKING

That she wasn't into guys, obviously...

Reply 4

reikazen

move on and stop making such big attactments to people ur just gonna keep hurting yourself.

Besides this guy might go away after awhile so just forgot about her till then lol

Reply 5

Jamie_T

Something similar happened to me. I really liked this girl that i worked with but she started dating this guy from her college. wait a while you will soon get over her. Don't ever get attached to a girl in that way unless your seeing them, i learned my lesson i hope you learn yours

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

reikazen

move on and stop making such big attactments to people ur just gonna keep hurting yourself.

That is very good advice and that does seem to be something I do a lot. I seem to feel connections with people really really quickly, and obviously with girls that ends up with me having these attachments really soon on. The big question, though, is how to stop myself doing this?!? :frown: