Dropping out but tutor trying to rethink my decision

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Silenceimagine
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Dont know if this is the right section for this but if not i request it to be moved to right one


Hi im 19yo st college doing level 2 childcare studies and feel im not in the right state of mind to go ahead with it this week is 2 weeks into the course

So yes i have tuition fee of £1095 which im stil put off by but i have few questions

If i drop out will i still need to pay my loan?

I already send off my dbs today which i didnt have to pay for (level2 entitlement) do i have to pay them this back if i drop out?

So this is gonna be my 4th year and obviously i would of done this course ages ago if i passed my English sooner(i passed tthis year) i have this gut feeling and thoughts that i shouldnt do it or i should get a job or i shouldnt be at college at this age, dont want to live with my mum no longer want to move out

I told my tutor about this and the thought of being unable to afford things for myself and she told me it would be real shame if i dropped out and got job and that i wouldnt have Qualifications saying i will be stuck doing factory and shop work (which made it feel worse for me whether im making right decision ) and i have Qualifications in health and social care and customer service passed my gcse english but not maths which i aint too bothered by

But i feel i aint in the right state of mind to do this i suffer with depression and i tend to self inflict if im under pressure and i wont finish till im 20 and i cant get weekend job coz of home circumstances

So i dont know if this is right decision what would you guys do
Last edited by Silenceimagine; 4 days ago
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RatLadyy
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Hi,

OP what do you mean by “i shouldnt be at college at this age”?

I was at college at your age, made it through to the end. I’ve just finished university and I’m aged 24, there’s nothing wrong with being at college at your age.

I’m currently living with my mum, but that is only because I don’t have a job (currently applying for some) and our local housing association is only giving immediate housing to people my age who are popping out children.

Don’t beat yourself up too much, I think you can do it and I think you have a successful career ahead of you.
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Silenceimagine
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(Original post by RatLadyy)
Hi,

OP what do you mean by “i shouldnt be at college at this age”?

I was at college at your age, made it through to the end. I’ve just finished university and I’m aged 24, there’s nothing wrong with being at college at your age.

I’m currently living with my mum, but that is only because I don’t have a job (currently applying for some) and our local housing association is only giving immediate housing to people my age who are popping out children.

Don’t beat yourself up too much, I think you can do it and I think you have a successful career ahead of you.
I just feel behind compared to others for example my friends they already done this course and left college at my age and have jobs now and i feel stupid taking loan out for a level2 course
I have mentioned to college last year that im desperate to move out coz of how the situation is at home etc and it will affect coursework and work placement as i will be doing it next month for 5 days for 6 months but i doubt i wont be high priority as i aint carrying a child or i aint exactly homeless but i aint meant to be where i am now coz landlord aint aware of me

And im having difficulty getting through to my mum coz im able to get bursary and they trying to sort it out as i dont get money from my mum as shes doesn't claim nothing and im not in contact with my dad at all whatsoever

And i just dont feel the motivation as i thought i would have as my mum knows how much i wanted to do this course even though i wanted to do it last year but i couldnt coz i didnt have the grades and they said twice they thought i wouldnt be strong enough to do it (i tried to apply twice to this course in two years but end up doing health and social care and employability) so after that i sort of given up

And i dont want tutor to be disappointed or think its shame
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R245
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You're can't cope 2 weeks and want to quit. Are you sure you're 19?
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Silenceimagine
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(Original post by R245)
You're can't cope 2 weeks and want to quit. Are you sure you're 19?
What you are trying to say? Yes im 19yo I babysit my siblings everyday literally after college i cant have a break i take them to nursery coz my mum has mental issue ans their dad struggles with 3 children coz my mum barely there for them so i step in to help so you wont know what its like trying to work through home life and study life at the same but this doesn't mean i want to quit i feel it wont work
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cleveranimal56
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(Original post by R245)
What do you think? Get your qualifications and grow up. It sounds like you're the one that needs baby sitting
Stop being so insolent.
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Silenceimagine
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(Original post by cleveranimal56)
Stop being so insolent.
Thankyou appreciate it.
It’s hard when no one understands the pressure and the decision i have to make and the things that are preventing me from doing so
my mum been away for a week and back this weekend so its been difficult week as i havent had much thinking time
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Ash1234
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There are some questions you need to ask yourself or you'll be living with regret. Regret and mental health issues don't go well and I know this from experience.

Sit down for a formal meeting with your college
Can your college not make a referral to social care for you regarding your home circumstances and mental health. If you've attempted or self-harmed surely your college need to "Safeguard" you. I feel you need to have a meeting with your college tutor, explain the situ properly and get them to send stuff in writing to social care that may push you up the list.

You need to seek help if you haven't already from mental health services. Contact your GP too. Maybe they can also help with the social care referral..

College and Career related advice
Where are your friends working?
So what do you plan or want to do after you drop out?
I'd stick with college whatever qualifications you can get the better to help in the long term..

Council House
Your saying you can get a council house because you have to be pregnant well atleast get on the list first. You never know...Dont worry about living with your parents. So many people won't be able to afford a house and will be living with their parents in their late 20s if not early 30s. These are people who are working and still living with their parents nothing wrong.

You need to be clear that if you drop out then are you going to be happy with working in a factory, supermarket or "on the dole" while your friends will be in a "professional jobs" or "working in jobs". Because thats what they will be and can you live with regret off not finishing your study..
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