My gap year has started and I’m doubting myself

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BeccaSX_x
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#1
Report Thread starter 8 months ago
#1
Last May, I was rejected to study English at Durham with 8s & 9s at GCSE and A* predictions. Durham has been my dream since I visited it on a family holiday in year 9 and just fell in love with the place. With COVID messing up uni applications so much, I decided to take a gap year and reapply, but now it’s begun I’m struggling massively. My friends have all moved away, except the 2 who are going to Durham and keep posting their supplies and pictures of their colleges on social media. My parents were against me doing a gap year in the first place, so I literally have nobody to talk to about how I’m feeling.

The problem is now I’m trying to rewrite my personal statement based on their feedback and every time I try I just picture that rejection on UCAS and I can’t bring myself to write anything. I’m terrified of rejection, I’m doubting every single thing I write and it’s gotten to the point where break down every time I open the document.

Durham is my dream, but my self doubt is convincing me that I was stupid to take a year out and I’ll have been stuck at home with no friends getting increasingly jealous only to be facing a second rejection in a few months. I really need some advice. Thanks in advance.
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planktion34
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#2
Report 8 months ago
#2
Go for a walk or leave your desk for an hour and once you come back just start writing and write anything
You’ll be fine once you have a block of text down then you can edit it and work on it little by little
Good luck!
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SuttonOG
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#3
Report 8 months ago
#3
Need to roll with the punches, is what it is but we move.
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Coventry University Student Ambassadors
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#4
Report 7 months ago
#4
(Original post by BeccaSX_x)
Last May, I was rejected to study English at Durham with 8s & 9s at GCSE and A* predictions. Durham has been my dream since I visited it on a family holiday in year 9 and just fell in love with the place. With COVID messing up uni applications so much, I decided to take a gap year and reapply, but now it’s begun I’m struggling massively. My friends have all moved away, except the 2 who are going to Durham and keep posting their supplies and pictures of their colleges on social media. My parents were against me doing a gap year in the first place, so I literally have nobody to talk to about how I’m feeling.

The problem is now I’m trying to rewrite my personal statement based on their feedback and every time I try I just picture that rejection on UCAS and I can’t bring myself to write anything. I’m terrified of rejection, I’m doubting every single thing I write and it’s gotten to the point where break down every time I open the document.

Durham is my dream, but my self doubt is convincing me that I was stupid to take a year out and I’ll have been stuck at home with no friends getting increasingly jealous only to be facing a second rejection in a few months. I really need some advice. Thanks in advance.
Hey BeccaSX_x,

I'm sorry you're experiencing difficulty overcoming rejection and feelings of loneliness. I can imagine it must be tough to get your head around and try to move on.

It's reassuring to know you're definitely not alone in how you feel, as there are people out there who have been rejected from unis of their first choice and don't want anywhere else to go to. It's great to hear you're not giving up and want another chance to apply! Though maybe what you need is some time away, a break, and a time to start again before applying to Durham. Use the gap year as an opportunity to build yourself, work on yourself and then get back into applying when you're ready to.
Don't rush writing your application because you're desperate to get in, but write following your passion and desire to study English. Processing your feedback, how can you improve? Have you considered their feedback and applied it to your thoughts practically? I wouldn't recommend solely writing a personal statement based on their feedback, but rather focus on what you can offer as a student who's interested in studying at Durham.
Don't lose yourself in the process of trying to get into Durham because you see it as the only way to go. Despite Durham being your number choice, there are other unis out there who offer English and maybe a much better fit for you, and all you need to do is go out there and explore your options. Yes, it may be your dream uni to attend, but it's not the only uni.

Taking a gap year isn't so bad! It does suck seeing your friends move on, making memories, and feeling like you're being left behind, but you're living life on your own terms now. You're independent and free to go about life on your own accord. So, take the time and opportunity you have to do something you enjoy, find activities to involve yourself in, work on improving yourself. Make the most of the time you have to yourself to discover what's out there and don't focus too much on the rejection. There's more to life than getting rejected from your dream uni.

Rejection hurts, but so does living your life in fear of rejection because you want something so bad it's stopping you from trying again. It's with rejection where you learn your struggles and how to overcome them. It's with rejection that you learn to appreciate what success is and it's rejection that helps you develop to become a stronger person in the end. Rejection sucks, but it's not the end. Learn to accept rejection for what it is, and realise it doesn't define you.

I understand it's a struggle not having someone to talk to and if you want to, you can always pm me to talk. I took a gap year and experienced my friends living life at uni while I stayed behind at home for a year.
Just know you are not alone.

Veronica
Student Ambassador
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161BMW
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#5
Report 7 months ago
#5
You can reapply and you can get in.
Look at your personal statement at where you can improve it
Explain what you doing in gap year how is making you better person
Eg
Paid job
Volunteering
Exercise
Charity work
Self development courses
Anything that makes you more rounded and not an immature wet behind the ears 18 year old.
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BeccaSX_x
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#6
Report Thread starter 7 months ago
#6
(Original post by Coventry University Student Ambassadors)
Hey BeccaSX_x,

I'm sorry you're experiencing difficulty overcoming rejection and feelings of loneliness. I can imagine it must be tough to get your head around and try to move on.

It's reassuring to know you're definitely not alone in how you feel, as there are people out there who have been rejected from unis of their first choice and don't want anywhere else to go to. It's great to hear you're not giving up and want another chance to apply! Though maybe what you need is some time away, a break, and a time to start again before applying to Durham. Use the gap year as an opportunity to build yourself, work on yourself and then get back into applying when you're ready to.
Don't rush writing your application because you're desperate to get in, but write following your passion and desire to study English. Processing your feedback, how can you improve? Have you considered their feedback and applied it to your thoughts practically? I wouldn't recommend solely writing a personal statement based on their feedback, but rather focus on what you can offer as a student who's interested in studying at Durham.
Don't lose yourself in the process of trying to get into Durham because you see it as the only way to go. Despite Durham being your number choice, there are other unis out there who offer English and maybe a much better fit for you, and all you need to do is go out there and explore your options. Yes, it may be your dream uni to attend, but it's not the only uni.

Taking a gap year isn't so bad! It does suck seeing your friends move on, making memories, and feeling like you're being left behind, but you're living life on your own terms now. You're independent and free to go about life on your own accord. So, take the time and opportunity you have to do something you enjoy, find activities to involve yourself in, work on improving yourself. Make the most of the time you have to yourself to discover what's out there and don't focus too much on the rejection. There's more to life than getting rejected from your dream uni.

Rejection hurts, but so does living your life in fear of rejection because you want something so bad it's stopping you from trying again. It's with rejection where you learn your struggles and how to overcome them. It's with rejection that you learn to appreciate what success is and it's rejection that helps you develop to become a stronger person in the end. Rejection sucks, but it's not the end. Learn to accept rejection for what it is, and realise it doesn't define you.

I understand it's a struggle not having someone to talk to and if you want to, you can always pm me to talk. I took a gap year and experienced my friends living life at uni while I stayed behind at home for a year.
Just know you are not alone.

Veronica
Student Ambassador
This was so reassuring to read, thank you Veronica! Although Durham is my first choice, I am also applying to Cambridge so I don’t have the luxury of time I’m afraid! I sent in my application three days ago and although I still don’t have much confidence in it, it is a relief that it’s no longer in my control! If you don’t mind me asking, what made you choose a gap year & what did you get up to?
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Coventry University Student Ambassadors
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#7
Report 7 months ago
#7
(Original post by BeccaSX_x)
This was so reassuring to read, thank you Veronica! Although Durham is my first choice, I am also applying to Cambridge so I don’t have the luxury of time I’m afraid! I sent in my application three days ago and although I still don’t have much confidence in it, it is a relief that it’s no longer in my control! If you don’t mind me asking, what made you choose a gap year & what did you get up to?
No problem!
Best of luck with your application

Have faith in yourself that everything will work out eventually.

I chose a gap year because I wanted to take time out of education. I wanted a break to do my own thing and enjoy being young and free without a lot of responsibilities. I worked, travelled, volunteered and worked to save up for uni!

Veronica
Student Ambassador
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