Anyone know how to comfort a girl with insecurities?

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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 1 month ago
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I try my best .. but I feel like im going nowhere

I compliment her and try to reason with her but i don't think she believes me
I know its not an overnight process...

and those insecurities are mostly physical aspects, she's so concerned about them ... but fails to acknowledge that she doesn't need to perfect

I complimented her emotional side.. because she is really wonderful emotionally... i enjoy conversing with her
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Anonymous #2
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insecurities can be something very ingrained in you and can be extremely hard to get over. just constant reassurance and genuine compliments will eventually help break down this barrier. you could also try being honest and tell them full out that you genuinely love the things they dislike about themselves and that they shouldn't worry so much about them and this might help them to be more confident in themselves. also compliment the physical aspects she's worried about as well as the emotional but try not to go overboard with compliments to the point it seems disingenuous
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
insecurities can be something very ingrained in you and can be extremely hard to get over. just constant reassurance and genuine compliments will eventually help break down this barrier. you could also try being honest and tell them full out that you genuinely love the things they dislike about themselves and that they shouldn't worry so much about them and this might help them to be more confident in themselves. also compliment the physical aspects she's worried about as well as the emotional but try not to go overboard with compliments to the point it seems disingenuous
Ooo Okayy… I literally do everything you said… now I’m worried if I’m doing it too much. I compliment it every time she brings it up or it comes into our convo
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Moonlight Rain
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A compliment by someone isn't going to stop someone from being insecure. Even if the whole world thought someone was beautiful, it wouldn't matter because they don't agree and that person's opinion of themselves matters the most
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Ooo Okayy… I literally do everything you said… now I’m worried if I’m doing it too much. I compliment it every time she brings it up or it comes into our convo
you should be fine since you're only bringing it up when its relevant so i doubt it seems disingenuous. also regarding what the other commenter said.. its true, compliments can only do so much, have you ever tried talking to her about maybe counselling or shown her some self help resources. it might seem upfront but you might be able to bring it up casually enough if she mentions her insecurities frequently
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Moonlight Rain)
A compliment by someone isn't going to stop someone from being insecure. Even if the whole world thought someone was beautiful, it wouldn't matter because they don't agree and that person's opinion of themselves matters the most
I kinda disagree. If everyone, for example, doesn't hate stretch marks and likes it... then i suppose they would also like that feature about themselves as it would influence them to think positively about stretch marks etc.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
you should be fine since you're only bringing it up when its relevant so i doubt it seems disingenuous. also regarding what the other commenter said.. its true, compliments can only do so much, have you ever tried talking to her about maybe counselling or shown her some self help resources. it might seem upfront but you might be able to bring it up casually enough if she mentions her insecurities frequently
no i haven't thought of that tbh. But I can do that.. and will try it out. Thank you for your suggestion
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Anonymous #3
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A compliment doesn't fix an insecurity for example i am insecure about my nose even though no one has ever said anything bad about it i just don't like it and plan on getting plastic surgery
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NonIndigenous
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I try my best .. but I feel like im going nowhere

I compliment her and try to reason with her but i don't think she believes me
I know its not an overnight process...

and those insecurities are mostly physical aspects, she's so concerned about them ... but fails to acknowledge that she doesn't need to perfect

I complimented her emotional side.. because she is really wonderful emotionally... i enjoy conversing with her
Question (don't get offended): is she much of an attention seeker as well by any chance?

I ask because that would look very different. Some people (not many) fake body image issues for attention. An example (bit of a cultural trope): "Does this dress make me look fat?". It's a parody, but based on reality that probably most people have experienced or at least heard of.

You would know better than I if this is the case. If she acts withdrawn about her insecurities, then this is probably not applicable. If she acts confrontational instead, then its quite likely that it is for attention. The way you 'handle' these types of people is you just ignore them and their shyt when they act this way.
Last edited by NonIndigenous; 4 weeks ago
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by NonIndigenous)
Question (don't get offended): is she much of an attention seeker as well by any chance?

I ask because that would look very different. Some people (not many) fake body image issues for attention. An example (bit of a cultural trope): "Does this dress make me look fat?". It's a parody, but based on reality that probably most people have experienced or at least heard of.

You would know better than I if this is the case. If she acts withdrawn about her insecurities, then this is probably not applicable. If she acts confrontational instead, then its quite likely that it is for attention. The wayhmm you 'handle' these types of people is you just ignore them and their shyt when they act this way.
hmm no i don't think she is. But then again, I am so my judgement may be off.
Hmmm tbh i think withdrawn rather than confrontational. She just complains how it makes her ugly and unlikeable. I don't think she demands for compliments if that is what you meannn
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1582
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You can't help her.

The only way for her to change her mindset is if she actively tries to address the things she dislikes about herself and either changes them or learns to accept them. No one else can do the work for her.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by 1582)
You can't help her.

The only way for her to change her mindset is if she actively tries to address the things she dislikes about herself and either changes them or learns to accept them. No one else can do the work for her.
How do I help her accept them? Some things aren't changeable easilyy.
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1582
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(Original post by Anonymous)
How do I help her accept them? Some things aren't changeable easilyy.
You can't. She has to do this by herself.
Last edited by 1582; 4 weeks ago
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by 1582)
You can't. She has to do this by herself.
oo okay thnks I guess ill just keep complimenting and hoping she will accept them one day. Thank you for your response
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HunterxK
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Pat her on the head, give her a hug and say 'there there, it's ok'.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by HunterxK)
Pat her on the head, give her a hug and say 'there there, it's ok'.
nahh kiss her to shut uppp .. she will get the indirect message i suppose
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