Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#1
I attended uni last year as a first year and had a really bad time. I have anxiety, depression, and Aspergers so I’m not great socially. I felt so awkward and anxious when in the kitchen at the same time as other people, to the point where I refused to leave my room to even eat or drink. I had a small fridge in my room so I could still make sandwiches and stuff. I dropped out after a term as the whole experience was so bad.

This year I am repeating first year elsewhere. So far I have only been here a few days so I can’t judge the uni or my course (though I am positive about it being better). I do however seem to be struggling with my living situation worse than before.

This time I am with 8 people rather than 6 and my room is the furthest from the kitchen so I have to walk past everyone when I go to the kitchen and am scared of making a noise in case I disturb them and they hate me. Also they’re much more sociable and are real party people so they’re always in the kitchen hanging out and making huge messes. We exchange hellos when I go in there but especially one of them, it always feels so fake and mean from her.

I’m too scared to use the oven in case someone comes in whilst I’m making food, and I’ve even stopped going to get a drink or anything. I don’t have a fridge this time so when I’m too anxious to leave my room I don’t have anything to drink. I’ve not had anything to drink for almost 24 hours as I’m too anxious to leave. I can feel myself already doing what I did last time, not leaving for anything except an in person lecture. I just want to be able to go and eat real food and drink things without being so anxious.

They had a party last night in the kitchen with people from other flats and it was so loud I had to sleep with my ear defenders on to be able to get any sleep with how loud they were being. That’s why I didn’t get anything to eat or drink for half of yesterday. I’m not sure what to do, I really need some advice.
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Anonymous #2
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Report 4 weeks ago
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I attended uni last year as a first year and had a really bad time. I have anxiety, depression, and Aspergers so I’m not great socially. I felt so awkward and anxious when in the kitchen at the same time as other people, to the point where I refused to leave my room to even eat or drink. I had a small fridge in my room so I could still make sandwiches and stuff. I dropped out after a term as the whole experience was so bad.

This year I am repeating first year elsewhere. So far I have only been here a few days so I can’t judge the uni or my course (though I am positive about it being better). I do however seem to be struggling with my living situation worse than before.

This time I am with 8 people rather than 6 and my room is the furthest from the kitchen so I have to walk past everyone when I go to the kitchen and am scared of making a noise in case I disturb them and they hate me. Also they’re much more sociable and are real party people so they’re always in the kitchen hanging out and making huge messes. We exchange hellos when I go in there but especially one of them, it always feels so fake and mean from her.

I’m too scared to use the oven in case someone comes in whilst I’m making food, and I’ve even stopped going to get a drink or anything. I don’t have a fridge this time so when I’m too anxious to leave my room I don’t have anything to drink. I’ve not had anything to drink for almost 24 hours as I’m too anxious to leave. I can feel myself already doing what I did last time, not leaving for anything except an in person lecture. I just want to be able to go and eat real food and drink things without being so anxious.

They had a party last night in the kitchen with people from other flats and it was so loud I had to sleep with my ear defenders on to be able to get any sleep with how loud they were being. That’s why I didn’t get anything to eat or drink for half of yesterday. I’m not sure what to do, I really need some advice.
You need to eat, your 3 meals a day or unfortunately are going to risk your health I'm afraid. You can start doing your stuff and ignore people around like what everyone else does buy if you too scared / can't be bothered to go to your own kitchen to make your food then you are responsible if you get health problems. Go ahead a risk your health & suffer the consequences and good luck with the real world if you are too scared to go to your own kitchen.
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Moonlight Rain
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Aww I want to give you a hug. You really sound like you have bad anxiety and maybe you should try and contact your GP for support with that. It's really important you seek help cause at this point, youre risking your life by not eating and drinking enough.
But honestly I totally get you. I'm always scared to see people too and try to avoid seeing people as much as possible.
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sxphlh11
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The fact you have tried again shows you have it in you to fight and overcome this struggle - it shows you are determined! i would encourage you to find someone u can comfortably open up to and if not then i encourage you to discuss your concerns with your tutor. There will be so much support available to you even if it feels like your alone right now. You need to create a routine and make it a priority to leave your room at regular intervals during the day. Not eating will only aggravate your anxiety which will make you feel even worse. It is daunting and you most likely feel extremely alone rn but going outside your comfort zone will be most beneficial thing for you to do atm. You CAN get thru this just stop doubting yourself! I wish you the best of luck &take care
Last edited by sxphlh11; 4 weeks ago
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Anonymous #3
#5
Report 4 weeks ago
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I’m so sorry you’re having such a tough time at the moment. Good on you for giving uni another chance.

Could you ask and see if your uni has quiet halls you could move into? Or could you talk to someone at the uni and ask to move halls?

Nobody will be annoyed at you for walking past their room, and you can of course use the oven whenever you want to. You are just as important as they are.

In the mean time, could you keep some bottles of water and snacks in your room?
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