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Did I react the right way to my ex?

Hi guys
So about a year and a half ago I finished with this guy I had been seeing for a while. It was a casual thing but I ended up getting feelings for him, we had a nice time together beyond sex. We shared a lot of laughs and would be comfortable just chilling out. The sex was good tbh but It wasn't everything. I asked him to respect I couldn't do casual though and he didn't *so it carried on, he would always blame his life being a bit hectic to not commit, I dunno, I saw the good in him and always tried to lift him up and help him get his life back on track but maybe that was too much. But he would say and do things that would make me think/believe he felt the same way as me (e.g telling me he liked me, he stopped over at mine and vice versa regularly, message all the time, shared a tooth brush once , gross I know but) anyway eventually ended it when I realised this guy is actually just kind of a douche and was sleeping with another girl. And so it hurt but I got on with my life.Then a year later after not hearing a word from him he texts me to say he thinks hes given me an STD and that he's sorry but go get checked. Then said he was 'heartbroken' when I left and that I was 'everything he wanted but the timing couldn't have been worse' (If you're rolling your eyes by now I did when I read that) anyway I get checked and I am positive. I haven't slept with anyone since him or when I was seeing him so it was only from him. I tell him its positive and his answer was 'well just take the pills and hope for the best, I can't be thinking about this now ive got bigger things on my mind'. and that was it never heard from him since. *I was hurt, I was angry I felt like ****, not only because I still had some left over feelings for him and realised he was probably sleeping with a lot of other girls when seeing me, but I felt dirty and very isolated as I didn't tell anyone about it.
Fast forward to the last month. He started coming back into the pub I work in (where we met) which he hasn't done for about a year and half. Asked my friend if I still worked there and she said it was none of his business so he said 'well she is then'. She told me he came in with his gf (that kinda stung when all he would say to me is "I can't commit")who was trying to score speed off some guys in the beer garden and he was sat inside the whole night. But ive been dreading seeing him for the first time in so long and then I saw him last night. It was weird I got this like stabbing feeling in my stomach but was determined not to let him know I was rattled in anyway. I thought for weeks what I would say to his face when I saw him. But I just blanked him. He asked for a drink at the bar and it was busy so I just pretended like he wasn't there. and when he tried to speak to me when I was out collecting glasses etc I just did the same. I didn't give him a word not even a glance really. He kept calling my name and gestured to me that he wanted to speak to me and I gave him a dismissive glance and he left with his friends. And I know its petty but I hope he feels like s*** or like he knows I dont care about him anymore , because after everything he put me through I just hope he feels regretful. Sorry im only human. And I am happy in my life now and I dont ever think about him but when he was stood right in front of me its hard to not feel something.The other part of me wonders what it is he was going to say to me? My friend reckons he said to her he felt bad about how he treated me but I highly doubt it, or am I just being cynical? . So did I react right? Do you think he feels bad?

Reply 1

Dunnig Kruger

I think you did right to blank him. Your life is better-off without him in it.

Your story is useful reading for others too. Unprotected sex always comes with a risk of infection. How big a risk that is, all depends.

Hopefully you can make a full recovery from whatever you got from him, with no lasting harm?

There will be men out there that won't give you an infection - because they take more care and responsibility about these things.
As well as men that aren't into poisoning themselves with illegal substances, like speed.
That will also make you laugh and give you good enough sex whilst being open and honest about having or not having sex with anyone else.
When it comes to men you can have your cake and eat it. You don't have to put up with a sub-standard man.