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How long did it take you to find your friend group at Uni?

Tomorrow is the first official day at my Uni and I'm bored already. Don't have any proper mates at Uni apart from acquaintance housemates. So I'm wondering to those of you that went to uni or are currently at uni: How long did it take for you to find your friend group.

Now for postgraduate students you guys can answer how long it took for you for undergrad and postgrad. I'll probably do postgrad when I graduate so it would be nice to know.

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I’m sort of in the same situation! I’ve made plenty of friends, but not a group. So often has me feeling pretty lonely.

My flatmates have also bonded already, so it’s even worse.
Reply 2
Original post by SineadAdele
I’m sort of in the same situation! I’ve made plenty of friends, but not a group. So often has me feeling pretty lonely.

My flatmates have also bonded already, so it’s even worse.

I wouldn't say my roommates are friends tbh. Just acquaintances. I'll say hi when I see them but I don't really spend much of my spare time with them apart from when we are eating food.

Luckily, I can definitely say that out of all my other 4 roommates, they all are closest to me out of the 5 of us. But I'm not mates with any of them like I said. I walked to Asda alone today for example to do my grocery shopping. If I had proper mates at Uni, I wouldn't have had to go alone.
Original post by Anonymous
I wouldn't say my roommates are friends tbh. Just acquaintances. I'll say hi when I see them but I don't really spend much of my spare time with them apart from when we are eating food.

Luckily, I can definitely say that out of all my other 4 roommates, they all are closest to me out of the 5 of us. But I'm not mates with any of them like I said. I walked to Asda alone today for example to do my grocery shopping. If I had proper mates at Uni, I wouldn't have had to go alone.

Yeah I get you☹️!
Original post by Anonymous
Tomorrow is the first official day at my Uni and I'm bored already. Don't have any proper mates at Uni apart from acquaintance housemates. So I'm wondering to those of you that went to uni or are currently at uni: How long did it take for you to find your friend group.

Now for postgraduate students you guys can answer how long it took for you for undergrad and postgrad. I'll probably do postgrad when I graduate so it would be nice to know.


Hey, I'm now a second year at uni but I spent my first year completely online, I'm also a commuting student. I completely relate to how you're feeling and I must say its shocking for me to hear that you've not instantly made friends because you live in accommodation, I always assumed that was one of the biggest reasons which was holding me back from making real friends. I know and I've met people at uni but the friendship hasn't evolved and its sort of fizzled out if you get what I mean, I've made a lot of effort with people in my class and the class gc but god the class gc is so dry and I must say sometimes I've tired myself out with how much of an effort I've had to make to try and get people to do social things and they've not reciprocated it which is just disappointing. My advice would be join societies and take advantage of the fact that you live on campus and have easy access to social events and if you like your flatmates ask them to go to Asda with you next time :smile:.
(edited 2 years ago)
Original post by Darkgrungeangel
Hey, I'm now a second year at uni but I spent my first year completely online, I'm also a commuting student and I'm not just 20 minutes away. I completely relate to how you're feeling and I must say its shocking for me to hear that you've not instantly made friends because you live in accommodation, I always assumed that was one of the biggest reasons which was holding me back from making real friends. I know and I've met people at uni but the friendship hasn't evolved and its sort of fizzled out if you get what I mean, I've made a lot of effort with people in my class and the class gc but god the class gc is so dry and I must say sometimes I've tired myself out with how much of an effort I've had to make to try and get people to do social things and they've not reciprocated it which is just disappointing. My advice would be join societies and take advantage of the fact that you live on campus and have easy access to social events and if you like your flatmates ask them to go to Asda with you next time :smile:.

oh no, now im worried because im commuting to uni and ppl usually friends with ppl living on campus. And i also just found out that I have been thinking the wrong journey time from my house to uni since I applied. I'm now going there next year and it is 10 mins longer than I anticipated (34 ish mins now 42mins). I hope its because there are roads closed at the moment but thats too long :frown:
Undergrad: a month to meet the first couple of people I'd properly bond with. That group continued to expand every year and I left the course considering about half of the cohort (~60 people in total) good enough friends to hang out with outside of class.

Postgrad: I made a good group of friends week one! Who knows if it'll last.
(edited 2 years ago)
Original post by DeterminedGem21
oh no, now im worried because im commuting to uni and ppl usually friends with ppl living on campus. And i also just found out that I have been thinking the wrong journey time from my house to uni since I applied. I'm now going there next year and it is 10 mins longer than I anticipated (34 ish mins now 42mins). I hope its because there are roads closed at the moment but thats too long :frown:


Oh no I’m sorry I didn’t mean to worry you, I’m an hour and a half away from uni so your commute is not bad at all, I think if your commute is less than a hour you’ll be absolutely fine don’t worry, we all have very different experience at uni
Reply 8
I didn't really have one. I was older, knew the city well and had my groups of mates already. The result was that I didn't fret about it.

I did, however, meet two people on my first day that are still close friends now. Not enough to class as a 'group', perhaps, but still. They, like me, were older and had been around the block once or twice

When I was in Oxford over the past year, it was similar. The majority of my course mates were almost 15 years my junior and I didn't connect with any of them. So I made mates in the local biker boozer, with lads with whom I shared common interests
(edited 2 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Tomorrow is the first official day at my Uni and I'm bored already. Don't have any proper mates at Uni apart from acquaintance housemates. So I'm wondering to those of you that went to uni or are currently at uni: How long did it take for you to find your friend group.

Now for postgraduate students you guys can answer how long it took for you for undergrad and postgrad. I'll probably do postgrad when I graduate so it would be nice to know.

Hey, how was your first day at uni? I hope it went well.

Personally, I preferred to focus on my studies at university instead of going out and making friends. I started feeling more confident and talking to my course mates in my last year surprisingly! Don't put too much pressure on yourself to find your friend group, it can happen at any time and it's different for everyone :smile: There's no right or wrong way to experience uni life!

Have you thought about joining a club or society? Then you're around people who share similar interests to you, making conversation that bit easier. Or perhaps you could think about becoming a student ambassador or finding volunteering opportunities on campus, both fab ways of meeting new people.

I wish you the very best of luck with your uni experience :smile:

Becky
Original post by Anonymous
Tomorrow is the first official day at my Uni and I'm bored already. Don't have any proper mates at Uni apart from acquaintance housemates. So I'm wondering to those of you that went to uni or are currently at uni: How long did it take for you to find your friend group.

Now for postgraduate students you guys can answer how long it took for you for undergrad and postgrad. I'll probably do postgrad when I graduate so it would be nice to know.


Hi there,

Apart from being bored, I hope that your University experience and your studies are going well so far :smile:

I didn't really have my proper friendship group until the end of first year, so you've still got time! I met these girls on my course, and we just naturally grew closer together - so look out for people on your course! :biggrin: Have you joined any societies / looked at volunteering options your university may hold, this might be a good way to bust your boredom as well as meet new people you may not have met otherwise.

Best of luck to you!

Ana
University of Liverpool Rep.
Original post by Darkgrungeangel
Hey, I'm now a second year at uni but I spent my first year completely online, I'm also a commuting student and I'm not just 20 minutes away. I completely relate to how you're feeling and I must say its shocking for me to hear that you've not instantly made friends because you live in accommodation, I always assumed that was one of the biggest reasons which was holding me back from making real friends. I know and I've met people at uni but the friendship hasn't evolved and its sort of fizzled out if you get what I mean, I've made a lot of effort with people in my class and the class gc but god the class gc is so dry and I must say sometimes I've tired myself out with how much of an effort I've had to make to try and get people to do social things and they've not reciprocated it which is just disappointing. My advice would be join societies and take advantage of the fact that you live on campus and have easy access to social events and if you like your flatmates ask them to go to Asda with you next time :smile:.

The two roommates I speak to the most
One of them smokes loads of weed and is 2 years older and the other has many many friends and good ones that come here. So neither will more than likely plus I hate the smell of smoke in general so I don't wanna be walking to or from there and have to smell it

Original post by 1582
Undergrad: a month to meet the first couple of people I'd properly bond with. That group continued to expand every year and I left the course considering about half of the cohort (~60 people in total) good enough friends to hang out with outside of class.

Postgrad: I made a good group of friends week one! Who knows if it'll last.

In your postgrad group is everyone around the same age? Or do you have like 22 years olds with people old enough to be your parent?

And also where did you meet your undergrad and postgrad buddies. Were they your roommates, was it through societies or was it classmates? I'm kinda worried with my situation ngl, with 0 friends and 2 acquitances at Uni rn, I don't know how its gonna change plus I haven't came across people that came to my uni alone so most people already have their friend groups.

Original post by gjd800
I didn't really have one. I was older, knew the city well and had my groups of mates already. The result was that I didn't fret about it.

I did, however, meet two people on my first day that are still close friends now. Not enough to class as a 'group', perhaps, but still. They, like me, were older and had been around the block once or twice

When I was in Oxford over the past year, it was similar. The majority of my course mates were almost 15 years my junior and I didn't connect with any of them. So I made mates in the local biker boozer, with lads with whom I shared common interests

Fair enough. I have a group of mates already too but two of them are having the opposite uni life to me so far and have made loads of mates and that. Whereas for me I just have 2 acquitances.

Original post by University of Bradford
Hey, how was your first day at uni? I hope it went well.

Personally, I preferred to focus on my studies at university instead of going out and making friends. I started feeling more confident and talking to my course mates in my last year surprisingly! Don't put too much pressure on yourself to find your friend group, it can happen at any time and it's different for everyone :smile: There's no right or wrong way to experience uni life!

Have you thought about joining a club or society? Then you're around people who share similar interests to you, making conversation that bit easier. Or perhaps you could think about becoming a student ambassador or finding volunteering opportunities on campus, both fab ways of meeting new people.

I wish you the very best of luck with your uni experience :smile:

Becky

Thanks, my first day of Uni was average ngl. I didnt know my way to or from Uni so I ended up getting into class half an hour late due to getting confused using Google Maps.

Yeah, the priority for me too is studying but I would like to make friends too. At college I only made acquitances and I'm kinda worried that the same will happen at Uni. And yes, I'm gonna join one or two societies I think.

Original post by University of Liverpool Student Rep
Hi there,

Apart from being bored, I hope that your University experience and your studies are going well so far :smile:

I didn't really have my proper friendship group until the end of first year, so you've still got time! I met these girls on my course, and we just naturally grew closer together - so look out for people on your course! :biggrin: Have you joined any societies / looked at volunteering options your university may hold, this might be a good way to bust your boredom as well as meet new people you may not have met otherwise.

Best of luck to you!

Ana
University of Liverpool Rep.

Thank you so much. Yeah maybe the same may happen for me, I hope so at least. I'm gonna join one or two societies too but my problem is that its very easy to get lost around Uni as the campus is so big and there's buildings not attached to it like where my lecturers are so joining societies means I've gotta spend even more time doing that. But I will anyways though.
Original post by Anonymous
Thank you so much. Yeah maybe the same may happen for me, I hope so at least. I'm gonna join one or two societies too but my problem is that its very easy to get lost around Uni as the campus is so big and there's buildings not attached to it like where my lecturers are so joining societies means I've gotta spend even more time doing that. But I will anyways though.


I understand what you mean about your flatmates that kinda sucks I wouldn’t like that either, may I ask what uni you go to and what your studying ? I also get lost around campus too😂 that’s why I try and dedicate some time before the lecture to make sure I find the right room and I also didn’t really make any friends at college and I’ve lost touch with them now.
Still haven’t found any friends and I have been at university for an entire year already (this is mainly due to COVID)
Original post by Thisismyunitsr
Still haven’t found any friends and I have been at university for an entire year already (this is mainly due to COVID)

That will probably be me too this time next year ngl. Actually kinda depressing thinking about it. I went clubbing with an acquitance yesterday and he was able to wonder off with his mates whenever but since I didnt know anyone other than him and I barely even know him, I just stood there in the corner vibing to music mainly alone. Tbh, I don't get how some people said they went to clubs alone and found friends. At every club I've been to so far people go with their mates.

But yh tbh I'm done with these social events. Can't be bothered in the slightest anymore since they don't even get you mates or get you closer to your roommates. Or at least it hasn't in my case.

Original post by Darkgrungeangel
I understand what you mean about your flatmates that kinda sucks I wouldn’t like that either, may I ask what uni you go to and what your studying ? I also get lost around campus too😂 that’s why I try and dedicate some time before the lecture to make sure I find the right room and I also didn’t really make any friends at college and I’ve lost touch with them now.

Which thing do you understand about my roommates by any chance?😂 Because there's so much. Yeah I made 0 friends at college too, only acquitances. Actually depressing thinking about it because my Uni experience is gonna be the exact same if not even worse as at college I had more acquaintances than I do now at Uni. And at college I knew my acquitnances more. Whereas at Uni I have 2 acquaintances and I don't know either of their names (forgot them already) and one of them has loads of mates so when I went clubbing with him he obviously left to go with his friends at points (at times they were stood next to me and other times they were elsewhere) and the other smokes weed, is 2 years older and bought the wristbands so is going to a different event as a whole to the one me and my other roommate have gone to.

And I go to the University of Leicester and study Business, what about you? I'm genuinely convinced I'm gonna make 0 friends at Uni tbh at this rate. I shouldve went to a Uni a friend of mine is going to because literally I haven't seen anyone at Uni other than myself not know anyone after going in.
Original post by Anonymous
The two roommates I speak to the most
One of them smokes loads of weed and is 2 years older and the other has many many friends and good ones that come here. So neither will more than likely plus I hate the smell of smoke in general so I don't wanna be walking to or from there and have to smell it


In your postgrad group is everyone around the same age? Or do you have like 22 years olds with people old enough to be your parent?

And also where did you meet your undergrad and postgrad buddies. Were they your roommates, was it through societies or was it classmates? I'm kinda worried with my situation ngl, with 0 friends and 2 acquitances at Uni rn, I don't know how its gonna change plus I haven't came across people that came to my uni alone so most people already have their friend groups.


Fair enough. I have a group of mates already too but two of them are having the opposite uni life to me so far and have made loads of mates and that. Whereas for me I just have 2 acquitances.


Thanks, my first day of Uni was average ngl. I didnt know my way to or from Uni so I ended up getting into class half an hour late due to getting confused using Google Maps.

Yeah, the priority for me too is studying but I would like to make friends too. At college I only made acquitances and I'm kinda worried that the same will happen at Uni. And yes, I'm gonna join one or two societies I think.


Thank you so much. Yeah maybe the same may happen for me, I hope so at least. I'm gonna join one or two societies too but my problem is that its very easy to get lost around Uni as the campus is so big and there's buildings not attached to it like where my lecturers are so joining societies means I've gotta spend even more time doing that. But I will anyways though.


Hi there,

I'd see if your University has a maps app (like google maps) where it can direct you to where the different buildings are. Getting lost is a pretty common fear haha, so don't worry about being too late to things - it's only normal! Alternatively, try and see if you can meet with others in the society somewhere that's familiar to you, and then walk to your society's room from there :biggrin:

Best of luck to you

Ana
University of Liverpool Rep. :smile:
Original post by Anonymous



Which thing do you understand about my roommates by any chance?😂 Because there's so much. Yeah I made 0 friends at college too, only acquitances. Actually depressing thinking about it because my Uni experience is gonna be the exact same if not even worse as at college I had more acquaintances than I do now at Uni. And at college I knew my acquitnances more. Whereas at Uni I have 2 acquaintances and I don't know either of their names (forgot them already) and one of them has loads of mates so when I went clubbing with him he obviously left to go with his friends at points (at times they were stood next to me and other times they were elsewhere) and the other smokes weed, is 2 years older and bought the wristbands so is going to a different event as a whole to the one me and my other roommate have gone to.

And I go to the University of Leicester and study Business, what about you? I'm genuinely convinced I'm gonna make 0 friends at Uni tbh at this rate. I shouldve went to a Uni a friend of mine is going to because literally I haven't seen anyone at Uni other than myself not know anyone after going in.


Oh sorry I didn't make that clear, I was meaning that I understand why you wouldn't want to walk to Asda and have weed smoke blowing in your face haha. College was a bit weird for me because I just didn't really like anyone and didn't really want to be friends with them I sort of just hung out with them at college cause I had to but I didn't really enjoy their company and still used to feel lonely as I had nothing to do with them after school and I just generally didn't find "my people" at college. The people that I sort of know at uni which are from my class I've never even met in person and tbh my biggest struggle has been getting people to make an effort with me instead of me putting in all the work which is just draining and kinda sad. In a weird way I think vibing to music alone in a club is a bit of a mood ahaha but I get how in the moment it probably felt lonely, these 2 acquaintances don't sound the best in terms of making an effort and as you've said they seem pretty preoccupied with their own friends but maybe you should push yourself into their friend group and you might end up being better friends with someone in their group than you are with your roommate, you just never know, expanding your social circle through the people you vaguely know might be a good trick. Just remember though even if you're in a group of 3 people like I was at college you may not always enjoy their company and you may still feel lonely so just saying don't always think it sucks just because you've got no one.

I go to the University of Chester and study Economics and Sociology, do you have any hobbies ?? I guess one must ask the question what sort of friend are you looking for, what sort of person would you feel you had similar interests with, have you sort of seen anyone that you think " I might get along well with them" ?.
(edited 2 years ago)
Took me around a yr but I have bad anxiety too
Original post by Anonymous
That will probably be me too this time next year ngl. Actually kinda depressing thinking about it. I went clubbing with an acquitance yesterday and he was able to wonder off with his mates whenever but since I didnt know anyone other than him and I barely even know him, I just stood there in the corner vibing to music mainly alone. Tbh, I don't get how some people said they went to clubs alone and found friends. At every club I've been to so far people go with their mates.

But yh tbh I'm done with these social events. Can't be bothered in the slightest anymore since they don't even get you mates or get you closer to your roommates. Or at least it hasn't in my case.


Which thing do you understand about my roommates by any chance?😂 Because there's so much. Yeah I made 0 friends at college too, only acquitances. Actually depressing thinking about it because my Uni experience is gonna be the exact same if not even worse as at college I had more acquaintances than I do now at Uni. And at college I knew my acquitnances more. Whereas at Uni I have 2 acquaintances and I don't know either of their names (forgot them already) and one of them has loads of mates so when I went clubbing with him he obviously left to go with his friends at points (at times they were stood next to me and other times they were elsewhere) and the other smokes weed, is 2 years older and bought the wristbands so is going to a different event as a whole to the one me and my other roommate have gone to.

And I go to the University of Leicester and study Business, what about you? I'm genuinely convinced I'm gonna make 0 friends at Uni tbh at this rate. I shouldve went to a Uni a friend of mine is going to because literally I haven't seen anyone at Uni other than myself not know anyone after going in.

Go and join 2-3 societies that look interesting at Fresher's fair - this is a much easier way of building friendships than going to a club. You will definitely meet friends that way.
Original post by Anonymous
In your postgrad group is everyone around the same age? Or do you have like 22 years olds with people old enough to be your parent?

And also where did you meet your undergrad and postgrad buddies. Were they your roommates, was it through societies or was it classmates? I'm kinda worried with my situation ngl, with 0 friends and 2 acquitances at Uni rn, I don't know how its gonna change plus I haven't came across people that came to my uni alone so most people already have their friend groups.

I met them exclusively through my classes. In my postgrad, most are early-to-mid 20s. I'm 29 and only met one person older than me so far. Due to a lack of in-person classes we made the effort to coordinate activities ourselves. I'm posting this from a study room on-campus with four of my classmates.

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