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My boyfriend’s penis won’t fit in my vagina.. is this normal?

Sorry for the blunt/graphic question, but I’m a little bit worried because I recently started having penetrative sex with my boyfriend (I haven’t had sex before this) but we’re really struggling to fit it all in..

Basically it goes in about 1/3 to half way in and then it just starts to really hurt and almost feels like it’s hitting a wall.. I’m trying to work out whether we are just doing it at the wrong angle, or if it’s too tight or something else.. we use loads of lube so I don’t think it’s to do with friction.

Just wondered if this was something that anyone else experienced when they first started having sex, and if it’s something that will resolve with time?

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You are probably just not aroused enough. Try engaging in foreplay.
Reply 2
Original post by CaptainDuckie
You are probably just not aroused enough. Try engaging in foreplay.

We do a lot of foreplay beforehand so I feel like it’s probably not that? It’s frustrating because mentally I’m there but it just seems like physically my body isn’t finding it as easy!
Original post by Anonymous
We do a lot of foreplay beforehand so I feel like it’s probably not that? It’s frustrating because mentally I’m there but it just seems like physically my body isn’t finding it as easy!



Might be your nerves. I’d suggest trying alternative foreplay, for example he could spend more time on you down there rather than just going straight in.

Of course if this becomes persistent then it could be some underlying cause so I’d contact a Dr.
(edited 3 years ago)
Possible Scenarios:

1. Your vagina hole is too small, use dildos or his fingers or your fingers to make it bigger
2. His d ck is too big for your vagina

so maybe find someone with a smaller d ck or make your vagina hole opening bigger
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry for the blunt/graphic question, but I’m a little bit worried because I recently started having penetrative sex with my boyfriend (I haven’t had sex before this) but we’re really struggling to fit it all in..

Basically it goes in about 1/3 to half way in and then it just starts to really hurt and almost feels like it’s hitting a wall.. I’m trying to work out whether we are just doing it at the wrong angle, or if it’s too tight or something else.. we use loads of lube so I don’t think it’s to do with friction.

Just wondered if this was something that anyone else experienced when they first started having sex, and if it’s something that will resolve with time?

don't you think that's the hymen?
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry for the blunt/graphic question, but I’m a little bit worried because I recently started having penetrative sex with my boyfriend (I haven’t had sex before this) but we’re really struggling to fit it all in..

Basically it goes in about 1/3 to half way in and then it just starts to really hurt and almost feels like it’s hitting a wall.. I’m trying to work out whether we are just doing it at the wrong angle, or if it’s too tight or something else.. we use loads of lube so I don’t think it’s to do with friction.

Just wondered if this was something that anyone else experienced when they first started having sex, and if it’s something that will resolve with time?

same happened here with my bf, we found that we jsut had to keep at it every day with tons of lube, until it stretched my tiny hole enough for him to fit in without hurting me, try measuring his thickness with your fingers and both of you can work up to being able to finger yourself with those amount of fingers so that way you get used to the size
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry for the blunt/graphic question, but I’m a little bit worried because I recently started having penetrative sex with my boyfriend (I haven’t had sex before this) but we’re really struggling to fit it all in..

Basically it goes in about 1/3 to half way in and then it just starts to really hurt and almost feels like it’s hitting a wall.. I’m trying to work out whether we are just doing it at the wrong angle, or if it’s too tight or something else.. we use loads of lube so I don’t think it’s to do with friction.

Just wondered if this was something that anyone else experienced when they first started having sex, and if it’s something that will resolve with time?

The angle/position can also make a difference, so you could try other positions. And as you say, extra foreplay and lube can always help. It could simply just be that he's hitting your cervix, and a different position could work better - if you both enjoy sex without complete penetration, there's no reason you have to do that, either. There's some good advice here https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/too_big_for_me and https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/if_im_short_is_my_vagina_short_too

If you are aroused and want to have sex, it can be worth ruling out any physical problems with a GP visit too.
Reply 8
Not too nit pick too much but i think you mean it hurts as opposed to wont fit, if you can get a baby out the penis isnt an issue aha. As others sauid though, it just takes time, go slowly with lots of foreplay and maybed lube if you need it and youll get used to it.
Theres also ways like using a dilator that you can do at home but that probably isnt needed.
If its really bad, and his penis isnt particularly big to start with, you might look at something called vagimmosis (**** knows how its spelt) which some girls seem to have? Probably not you cant hurt to check
Reply 9
I just wonder how old you are. If you are in puberty, then your vagina is still developing. Speak to your Doctor who will explain your options.
i assume you are both in your teens or early 20s
Original post by becausethenight
The angle/position can also make a difference, so you could try other positions. And as you say, extra foreplay and lube can always help. It could simply just be that he's hitting your cervix, and a different position could work better - if you both enjoy sex without complete penetration, there's no reason you have to do that, either. There's some good advice here https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/too_big_for_me and https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/if_im_short_is_my_vagina_short_too

If you are aroused and want to have sex, it can be worth ruling out any physical problems with a GP visit too.


Thanks, that’s really helpful. It is getting better but I think just certain angles are tricky.. I have a feeling he’s hitting the cervix (I might have an awkwardly tiled one?) so think it’s just a case of gradual perseverance, lots of lube and foreplay.
Original post by Anonymous
Thanks, that’s really helpful. It is getting better but I think just certain angles are tricky.. I have a feeling he’s hitting the cervix (I might have an awkwardly tiled one?) so think it’s just a case of gradual perseverance, lots of lube and foreplay.

Glad to hear it's getting better :smile:
Honestly, sometimes it's enough to just avoid positions you don't enjoy!
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry for the blunt/graphic question, but I’m a little bit worried because I recently started having penetrative sex with my boyfriend (I haven’t had sex before this) but we’re really struggling to fit it all in..

Basically it goes in about 1/3 to half way in and then it just starts to really hurt and almost feels like it’s hitting a wall.. I’m trying to work out whether we are just doing it at the wrong angle, or if it’s too tight or something else.. we use loads of lube so I don’t think it’s to do with friction.

Just wondered if this was something that anyone else experienced when they first started having sex, and if it’s something that will resolve with time?

the sabe thing happened with me, I think it’s fairly common at first so I wouldn’t worry about it too much. What I found that the penis wasn’t quite at the right angle, it was too low down like too close to the butthole so just ask your boyfriend to move it up a bit and also try stretching your legs out s but wider to see if that helps at all. From my experience, I found that you just kind of have to both keep adjusting positions until you get the right place and when you do it will be less painful and more enjoyable for both of you, alternatively try going on top? Hope this helped :smile:
I’ve been told Throughout life in multiple situations if it won’t fit
you just got to hit it with a hammer lmfao
Maybe if he just pounded that ass
Without worrying if it hurts it’ll force you to push past your limits
I mean you never know
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard pain is pleasure or that it hurts so good
Original post by Anonymous #2
Possible Scenarios:
1. Your vagina hole is too small, use dildos or his fingers or your fingers to make it bigger
2. His d ck is too big for your vagina
so maybe find someone with a smaller d ck or make your vagina hole opening bigger
You're an ******* 💀
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry for the blunt/graphic question, but I’m a little bit worried because I recently started having penetrative sex with my boyfriend (I haven’t had sex before this) but we’re really struggling to fit it all in..
Basically it goes in about 1/3 to half way in and then it just starts to really hurt and almost feels like it’s hitting a wall.. I’m trying to work out whether we are just doing it at the wrong angle, or if it’s too tight or something else.. we use loads of lube so I don’t think it’s to do with friction.
Just wondered if this was something that anyone else experienced when they first started having sex, and if it’s something that will resolve with time?

Same
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry for the blunt/graphic question, but I’m a little bit worried because I recently started having penetrative sex with my boyfriend (I haven’t had sex before this) but we’re really struggling to fit it all in..
Basically it goes in about 1/3 to half way in and then it just starts to really hurt and almost feels like it’s hitting a wall.. I’m trying to work out whether we are just doing it at the wrong angle, or if it’s too tight or something else.. we use loads of lube so I don’t think it’s to do with friction.
Just wondered if this was something that anyone else experienced when they first started having sex, and if it’s something that will resolve with time?

have you looked into vaginismus? its a medical condition that means that sometimes happens
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry for the blunt/graphic question, but I’m a little bit worried because I recently started having penetrative sex with my boyfriend (I haven’t had sex before this) but we’re really struggling to fit it all in..
Basically it goes in about 1/3 to half way in and then it just starts to really hurt and almost feels like it’s hitting a wall.. I’m trying to work out whether we are just doing it at the wrong angle, or if it’s too tight or something else.. we use loads of lube so I don’t think it’s to do with friction.
Just wondered if this was something that anyone else experienced when they first started having sex, and if it’s something that will resolve with time?

when me and my bf started having sex 1y ago, we had the same problem. i dont know why or how.
Original post by BrittneyPergus
when me and my bf started having sex 1y ago, we had the same problem. i dont know why or how.

oh hey babe what are u doing here?