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Who is in the wrong?

so i had an argument with my bsf today and its been bothering me how she made it out like i was in the wrong when really i think it was a misunderstanding between us and she shouldve just opened up.

a few days ago my ex asked her out to prom as friends. i was a bit jealous because i still like him but i didnt mind really because i know that he likes her a bit and hes moved on from me. i dont wanna hold him back. she refused to go because she didnt want to hurt my feelings then proceeded to tell the group to "not tell me because its not important". i find this a bit unusual because we are bsf and we tell each other everything. i found out from my ex that he asked her and she said no when we were talking about prom. i was then told by a friend that she was asked by my ex but she specifically told everyone not to tell me. i already knew he asked her to prom but after hearing she didnt want me to know hurt my feelings a bit. after that she grew distant and started to avoid me a bit. she stopped answering my texts and was sitting in a new friend group entirely, with people i dont even get along with. i understand that neither of us fit into our old friend group and i have moved on from them but they are mutual friends, somewhere we could hang out together and it felt like she was taking that away. she also started to leave me out of conversations in lessons and only talk to me if it was a group chat or for the answers. after a few days, someone in our maths class said that she had heard a bad rumour about me. i put two and two together and assumed she had believed that rumour which was why she was distancing herself. i gave her many chances to tell me what was wrong but on each occasion she was adamant that nothing was wrong. today she pulled me to the side and asked why i was mad at her and i got really confused. after a while of back and forth arguing, she told me that she still doesnt understand why she shouldve told me my ex asked her out to prom. she said she was protecting my feelings and i had no need to know. when i told her that i think i do need to know because 1. hes my ex and 2. we are bsf she said that she said no so it didnt matter and that she was doing what was best for me. i then said i was bound to find out anyway since i still talk to my ex, even though its on the odd occasion. she then accused me of talking about her behind her back and saying how its my fault she grew distant because i never stopped talking about boys or boring subjects and i that hung out with new people. i felt hurt because whenever i tried to start a conversation with her she never paid attention and the only time she did was when i had drama which was usually boy related. i also didnt know why my life, family and what i did at the weekend was a "boring subject". i felt hurt and put down since we always used to be there for each other and i told her this and she got mad saying im never there for her when i always put her needs before mine. weve previously had a similar argument where she believed i over stepped my mark when i was just trying to make her see things in a different point of view. when she thinks shes right, shell argue non stop until shes won, even when shes wrong.

i just want to know if im really in the wrong for wanting her to tell me these things. i want to fix this relationship and lately its been a bit rocky. shes my bsf and shes the closest ive ever gotten to someone. i dont wanna mess this up.

sorry for it being so long and no paragraphs am not too great at that haha

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

It’s not that big of a deal. There’s bigger problems in the world. knowing who’s in the right won’t change anything cuz it’s subjective. You’re just wasting your time.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

It’s not that big of a deal. There’s bigger problems in the world. knowing who’s in the right won’t change anything cuz it’s subjective. You’re just wasting your time.

i know theres bigger problems in the world but right now this is bothering me
i guess what i really want to know is is it worht it staying friends with her? i feel like she uses me a lot and we are growing apart. whenever we argue she makes it seem like im a ***** and its my fault and i want to know if i should move on