Is dating much harder for average guys compared to average women?

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Anonymous #1
#81
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#81
(Original post by Anonymous)
I’m not sure I’ve believe that, I know guys at uni who are (objectively) very unatttractive, have no real job prospects, have poor personality’s and no body likes them. They have sex and dates and stuff
Well I’m living proof of it and I know several friends in same situation. Got good degrees, have good jobs and some even own a property. Most of them are at least Average looking too. And they have tried asking out women, speed dating, online dating, meeting people at social events etc. But some are older than me (35,37 few over 40) yet they have never ever even kissed a woman in their life or been on 1 date despite trying.
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Anonymous #3
#82
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#82
(Original post by Anonymous)
Well I’m living proof of it and I know several friends in same situation. Got good degrees, have good jobs and some even own a property. Most of them are at least Average looking too. And they have tried asking out women, speed dating, online dating, meeting people at social events etc. But some are older than me (35,37 few over 40) yet they have never ever even kissed a woman in their life or been on 1 date despite trying.
What are their personalities like? If women don’t like them then it sucks but not much they can do. Maybe they try to hard?
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miser
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#83
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#83
Yes, because all else being equal women tend to be pickier than men.

That being said, the average guy can work on himself and significantly improve his dating prospects, whereas that's usually much harder for women.
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Anonymous #1
#84
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#84
(Original post by Anonymous)
What are their personalities like? If women don’t like them then it sucks but not much they can do. Maybe they try to hard?
They’re all normal people. I think for some people neither trying hard or not trying works. There are guys who can just stand there and will get attention from women. And yes, it’s true no one is entitled to a relationship or a date. The world is just an unfair place.
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londonmyst
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#85
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#85
(Original post by CorporalJin)
I mean if anything that just proved my point that you are not willing to stick it out and make things work as soon as you see they are not getting it right.
You literally just proved your hypergamous behaviour if you wanted to or not, as I said, its literally built in Womens DNA...
It isn't about them 'not getting it right'.
Just avoiding wasting the time of an incompatible person with incompatible ambitions, sexual preferences or values.

Hypergamy is based on the dubious premise that all females that are sexually/romantically/maritally interested in males prefer those of "a superior sociological or educational background."
I have dated guys of a variety of income levels and employment backgrounds, including guys that didn't go to uni
I enjoy adding to my collection of postgrad qualifications and wouldn't date a guy with a PhD.
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Anonymous #1
#86
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#86
(Original post by londonmyst)
It isn't about them 'not getting it right'.
Just avoiding wasting the time of an incompatible person with incompatible ambitions, sexual preferences or values.

Hypergamy is based on the dubious premise that all females that are sexually/romantically/maritally interested in males prefer those of "a superior sociological or educational background."
I have dated guys of a variety of income levels and employment backgrounds, including guys that didn't go to uni
I enjoy adding to my collection of postgrad qualifications and wouldn't date a guy with a PhD.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. Everyone can choose to live and select partners however they want.
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CorporalJin
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#87
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(Original post by Callicious)
Probably increases the odds compared to asking random broads on the street though, eh lad?
Most guys that have intentions of getting laid with a girl can't be just ''friends'' You should now that by now.
Being friendzoned and being platonic is two completely different things..

Also commenting on your previous comment about viewership, its nice and cool to sound smart.
But a lot of those YT channels have opened up to say 90%+ of their viewbase are males.
LOGICALLY if men struggle more (Which is true) Then there would be more attention to those content in helping them out, no one is going to bother sitting 20+ minutes analysing and learning about gender dynamics if they didn't have a hard time doing so.

You're assuming that the ratio of views of Male Dating Help Videos (MDHVs) to Female Dating Help Videos (FMHVs) being large instantly equates to a bias favouring women in the dating game across-the-board.

Use some logic dude, if people are not struggling with a certain thing in life, they are more likely not going to bother/waste time looking for anwsers... If women ACTUALLY had as much as a hard time as men in dating then you would see a crap load more content for women talking about the subject, but you do not...

Again Men have it harder then women, its no secret, and no amount of BS from you will convince anyone otherwise...

EDIT: I think I may off have quoted the wrong person lol
Last edited by CorporalJin; 1 week ago
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Anonymous #3
#88
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#88
(Original post by Anonymous)
They’re all normal people. I think for some people neither trying hard or not trying works. There are guys who can just stand there and will get attention from women. And yes, it’s true no one is entitled to a relationship or a date. The world is just an unfair place.
Yeah it is. There’s a lot of normal people who I do not like because their personality is rude, off putting or they just have traits I don’t like. I find the guys that have the attention of women are often not very nice, and neither are the women or if they are they often don’t want anything serious. That’s what I see a lot of uni. It’s not always the case but that’s what I’ve observed in general so fat
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CorporalJin
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#89
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(Original post by xxKittyxx)
I can see from your emotional language and how you are confusing your own statistics, this is clearly a sore spot for you. To be 25 and still struggling must really sting.

You are not entitled to sex. Women are not there for your sexual gratification. Dating is competitive (that 70% of men are successful shows it is not that competitive). You need to actually offer something if you want a relationship or a hook-up.
So drop your sense of entitlement, drop your pseudo-intellectual theories about how victimised you are, stop blaming external factors, etc. as all you are doing is creating an echo chamber for yourself. Actually work on improving yourself and you may have some luck.
Don't know why you think im entitled to sex, Im well aware im not, and im not struggling, matter of fact Ive had my fair share compared to most guys my age.

Improving myself? Well Im finiancially well off, currently doing studies while maintaining a job at the same time whilst also being physically fit by going to the gym several times a week when I have the determination/motivation.
Im doing very well for myself and as stated doing better then most people my age.

But I appreciate the effort in shaming me and painting me in a bad life even though you know NOTHING about me.


drop your pseudo-intellectual theories
Nothing Pseudo when everything I have stated till now is actually true and you can look it up yourself.

80% of women are sleeping with 20% of the men at top.
And the 70% of guys in sexlessness study doesn't show how much they get down in a year, could be 1 or could be x100. But im willing to bet its definately in the lower end compared to women ,combining other studies that proof that. Again I like debating and researching these types of topics, not because im desperate like you make me out to be...
Again nice try.
Last edited by CorporalJin; 1 week ago
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Anonymous #3
#90
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#90
(Original post by CorporalJin)
Don't know why you think im entitled to sex, Im well aware im not, and im not struggling, matter of fact Ive had my fair share compared to most guys my age.

Improving myself? Well Im finiancially well off, currently doing studies while maintaining a job at the same time whilst also being physically fit by going to the gym several times a week when I have the determination/motivation.
Im doing very well for myself and as stated doing better then most people my age.

But I appreciate the effort in shaming me and painting me in a bad life even though you know NOTHING about me.


drop your pseudo-intellectual theories
Nothing Pseudo when everything I have stated till now is actually true and you can look it up yourself.
Again nice try.
Improving yourself doesn’t just mean money/studies/physical aspects.
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stressengstudent
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#91
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#91
(Original post by Anonymous)
It’s not just me. There are many men in a similar situation. How is it entitled to moan when I’ve literally never been on 1 date In my 30 years of life?
I'm not saying you're entitled for moaning. I'm saying you're entitled for expecting women to date you purely because you think you deserve it. Not everybody will be interested in you romantically, and that's okay. It would be best if you worked on your self-esteem before you even start to look at dating because until you've done that, a relationship will only ever be a bandaid on a more significant issue.

(Original post by Anonymous)
Yes I am the common denominator. I’m not attractive to women - I’ve been selected out by natural selection. I’m allowed to moan about that. It’s not a nice position to be I .
If you view life in such a pessimistic way, of course, you won't succeed. Looks aren't the only thing women are interested in; they want somebody who respects them and treats them equally. Instead of blaming looks, women, or society, take a look at yourself and think about if you would honestly date yourself.
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Anonymous #1
#92
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#92
(Original post by Anonymous)
Improving yourself doesn’t just mean money/studies/physical aspects.
There are a lot of ways one can improve themselves. Unfortunately for some men, the answer is probably just to accept that they might be single forever and learn to live life happy alone. But it’s far easier said than done.
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Anonymous #1
#93
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#93
(Original post by stressengstudent)
I'm not saying you're entitled for moaning. I'm saying you're entitled for expecting women to date you purely because you think you deserve it. Not everybody will be interested in you romantically, and that's okay. It would be best if you worked on your self-esteem before you even start to look at dating because until you've done that, a relationship will only ever be a bandaid on a more significant issue.


If you view life in such a pessimistic way, of course, you won't succeed. Looks aren't the only thing women are interested in; they want somebody who respects them and treats them equally. Instead of blaming looks, women, or society, take a look at yourself and think about if you would honestly date yourself.
I’m not expecting anyone to date me and I’m well aware that not everyone will like everyone. However, 30 years and not 1 date is extremely depressing. And it’s hard to maintain the positive attitude I had to it when i was younger after that long of continuous rejection and not 1 yes. I have worked on myself alot over the years.
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Callicious
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#94
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(Original post by CorporalJin)
Most guys that have intentions of getting laid with a girl can't be just ''friends'' You should now that by now.
Being friendzoned and being platonic is two completely different things..

Also commenting on your previous comment about viewership, its nice and cool to sound smart.
But a lot of those YT channels have opened up to say 90%+ of their viewbase are males.
LOGICALLY if men struggle more (Which is true) Then there would be more attention to those content in helping them out, no one is going to bother sitting 20+ minutes analysing and learning about gender dynamics if they didn't have a hard time doing so.

You're assuming that the ratio of views of Male Dating Help Videos (MDHVs) to Female Dating Help Videos (FMHVs) being large instantly equates to a bias favouring women in the dating game across-the-board.

Use some logic dude, if people are not struggling with a certain thing in life, they are more likely not going to bother/waste time looking for anwsers... If women ACTUALLY had as much as a hard time as men in dating then you would see a crap load more content for women talking about the subject, but you do not...

Again Men have it harder then women, its no secret, and no amount of BS from you will convince anyone otherwise...
Most guys that have intentions of getting laid with a girl can't be just ''friends'' You should now that by now.
Being friendzoned and being platonic is two completely different things..

Anecdotal: prove it.

Also commenting on your previous comment about viewership, its nice and cool to sound smart.
But a lot of those YT channels have opened up to say 90%+ of their viewbase are males.
LOGICALLY if men struggle more (Which is true) Then there would be more attention to those content in helping them out, no one is going to bother sitting 20+ minutes analysing and learning about gender dynamics if they didn't have a hard time doing so.

Go back to my other point about statistics and reducing YouTube analytic data. My only experience with statistics is with astronomy and is more bayesian than frequentist, but I'd hope that decent statistical rigour would be applied rather than applying "logic" in picking a hypothesis that satisfies your raw data, accounting for all the various possibilities that may bias the data which-way. For the love of God don't compare a lad describing how to up his game to gender dynamics :_:

Use some logic dude, if people are not struggling with a certain thing in life, they are more likely not going to bother/waste time looking for anwsers... If women ACTUALLY had as much as a hard time as men in dating then you would see a crap load more content for women talking about the subject, but you do not...

Where one goes when one struggles depends on a menagerie of variables, all of which you'd have to take into account when trying to disprove the NH of "No bias" and then pick "Bias favouring women in dating when being picked off the street by lads."

Again Men have it harder then women, its no secret, and no amount of BS from you will convince anyone otherwise...


Aye, lad.
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Anonymous #3
#95
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#95
(Original post by Anonymous)
I’m not expecting anyone to date me and I’m well aware that not everyone will like everyone. However, 30 years and not 1 date is extremely depressing. And it’s hard to maintain the positive attitude I had to it when i was younger after that long of continuous rejection and not 1 yes. I have worked on myself alot over the years.
have you tried online dating
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TCA2b
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#96
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#96
Go to a church, maybe you'll find a nice girl there.
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Anonymous #1
#97
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(Original post by Anonymous)
have you tried online dating
Yes, I tried improving my profile in various ways, asking female friends to look over it, using photo testing sites. I also paid for premium versions of online dating sites and apps. And I get 0 matches.
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Anonymous #3
#98
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yes, I tried improving my profile in various ways, asking female friends to look over it, using photo testing sites. I also paid for premium versions of online dating sites and apps. And I get 0 matches.
Huh that’s never happened to anyone I know before. Are you active on there? These apps only show your profile to people a lot if you are really active.. if you haven’t been on for a month you’ll get no matche shut you’ll get a lot more activity in a day if you are really active in that day
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TCA2b
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#99
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(Original post by miser)
Yes, because all else being equal women tend to be pickier than men.

That being said, the average guy can work on himself and significantly improve his dating prospects, whereas that's usually much harder for women.
Agree with this. I'm keen to see how that pickiness will play out as demographics skew ever so slightly more female.
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stressengstudent
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#100
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I’m not expecting anyone to date me and I’m well aware that not everyone will like everyone. However, 30 years and not 1 date is extremely depressing. And it’s hard to maintain the positive attitude I had to it when i was younger after that long of continuous rejection and not 1 yes. I have worked on myself alot over the years.
I can imagine it is depressing, and I'm sorry you're dealing with it. We're still in a pandemic, and many people (myself included) are reluctant to go out to meet people, so you never know; things may improve as time goes on. Instead of looking for women to date, treat them like your other friends. See what happens. You never know where things can go if you let life do its own thing.
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