Really upset/can't see point in life/confused/girls/ :S

Please keep anon or delete incase she see it…..

Basically I’ll try and keep this short because otherwise it’ll be about 3 pages long, I could go on all day

I have been “friends” with 3 sisters for about 3 years now, they live an hour away so I only get to see them once or twice a year, and although I would love to go and see them I have never had the chance and can’t exactly ask, plus I hate myself and wouldn’t feel at all confident in their house or out with them.

One of them basically (I feel) led me on about 6 months ago, sending suggestive text messages and saying I was a lovely boy and stuff like that. I got my hopes up only to find out she got with somebody else while I was on holiday. She was very distant with me when I got back and our “friendship” has never really been the same since. She and 1 of her sisters saw me about 3 months ago and I tried to hide my jealousy and how gutted I was to find out about her boyfriend from facebook, and how I have trouble even talking to her since because of the way she treated me. She split up with her boyfriend a few days after she last saw me but she has still been very distant with me. I was gutted to miss out the first time because I was too scared to ask her out or tell her how I feel, so I obviously didn’t want to make the same again, but whenever I text her now she will send maybe one reply and then ignore me, which is what she has always done with me, she is fine with other friends though. that’s why I say “friends” and “friendship”, as they are the only real friends I have ever had and they seem(/ed) great, but I know I am basically nothing to them, which even one has admitted.

People will say I’ll get over her in time etc, but I had the same situation a year ago with someone else I know and I never really got over that, then I moved to fancying this friend. When I found out about her relationship I was gutted and so now she isn’t with anyone I really want to ask her, but I am pretty sure she only sees me as a mate (and not even a good one). So even though I want to ask her just to get an answer and try and move on, I think it could wreck the last few strands of my friendship with both her and her sisters. Do people think it’s worth me asking to (probably) get rejected so I can try and move on? Or should I try and move on without asking (which I haven’t managed to do so far). I don’t want her to say yes out of pity for me either and then split with me a week later or something :frown:

.

I’m just so confused. I have never even kissed a girl before, I am in care because my family basically abandoned me and I have no friends (apart from those 3 who see me as nothing and another one who’s great but miles away) and I hate myself and can’t really see why anyone would go out with me, but her and her sisters have said that I will find the right person one day etc, I think they are just lying and saying it to look good, but they say they aren’t……

I am trying to get into uni and move away from here and never return, so I don’t even think a relationship would work because of the distance. Obviously if I had a stable relationship I would do anything to keep it and that includes returning, but don’t see how it would work and I guess I would feel even worse when it ends :frown:

The idea of uni is for a fresh start, but I fear I’ll always have the same problems, and if I don’t ask her I’ll have the next year+ of thinking what if. I know getting a girlfriend would help me get over her, but I don’t know any girls and can’t see myself getting one at all :frown:

life sucks I just want a girlfriend :frown:

Apparently I’m nice and caring blah blah blah, but in 17 years that has never done anything good for me :frown:

Meh I tried to keep that short……. It didn’t really work :frown:

Thanks to anyone can advise. I don’t really know what I’m after, should I ask her I suppose and risk making it hell with her sisters, and how can I stop myself feeling like life is pointless? :frown:

I have tried looking forward to uni but that doesn’t help, and everytime I see her name everything comes back again :frown:

Reply 1

crooks & castles

get a hobby seriously it will help, you will make friends naturally and build self confidence

or you could burn her house down.....or both

Reply 2

Ryarn

Lgold92

your gonna meet sooo many people at uni i reckon you should just focus on getting over her n start afresh when you go uni how ever hard it may be!!

I think this is the best advice you could be given. I'm sure if you do decide on uni, which i think you should, you'll look back on the situation and sigh because you've met so many decent people.

If you're trying to be friends with her and she's just being a **** about it then you probably shouldn't ask her. I'd just go along with it, do all you can to improve your 'friendly relationship' with her and if things progress, just go for it and ask her mate.

Reply 3

leonardo857

Ignore her then she will come after you. She like most girls is an attenion seeker and by making an effort you are giving her what she craves. Beat her at her own game. Never fails.

Reply 4

Nino9

In my honest opinion you have nothing to lose as you want to ignore her, so why not open up to her either it will end up working out for you. IF it doesn't and you don't speak to her again that was what you was intentionally going to do anyway so you don't lose out on anything and on the plus side you get an answer to why she has acted in that way.

Message her or phone her or even ask to meet up and speak face to face. Ask her why her attitude towards you has changed and if you have offended her in any way. After doing so express your feelings and tell her you miss her. Depending on the answer assess the situation and then try and make it right with her, she may even like you as much as you like her, sometimes it's best to face your fears.