Why do I feel self conscious around a guy that likes me

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
This may be a stupid question but there's a guy in my class who I can tell likes me and tries to talk to me a lot but I don't like him so I don't entertain him at all. I definitely don't like him and I want him to leave me alone but I always feel so self conscious around him. It makes me wonder if I like him at times but I know that I definitely don't since I get annoyed when he messages me. So why do I feel so self conscious and shy around him if i don't like him? I don't feel this shy around other people.
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sufys12
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#2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
This may be a stupid question but there's a guy in my class who I can tell likes me and tries to talk to me a lot but I don't like him so I don't entertain him at all. I definitely don't like him and I want him to leave me alone but I always feel so self conscious around him. It makes me wonder if I like him at times but I know that I definitely don't since I get annoyed when he messages me. So why do I feel so self conscious and shy around him if i don't like him? I don't feel this shy around other people.
That always happens when you like someone.
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Anonymous #2
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It’s simply because you know he likes you and so he will be watching you at some point, and so it is making you slightly paranoid.

It’s not because you like him.
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HousesInCork
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#4
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You're probably just feeling more self conscious because you know he likes you and is thus paying you specific unwanted attention. Perhaps you're also a bit anxious that he might try to initiate an uncomfortable situation, like a 1:1 convo or expressing his feelings directly.
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Anonymous #3
#5
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(Original post by Anonymous)
This may be a stupid question but there's a guy in my class who I can tell likes me and tries to talk to me a lot but I don't like him so I don't entertain him at all. I definitely don't like him and I want him to leave me alone but I always feel so self conscious around him. It makes me wonder if I like him at times but I know that I definitely don't since I get annoyed when he messages me. So why do I feel so self conscious and shy around him if i don't like him? I don't feel this shy around other people.
You don't actually know he likes you remember. He may just want to be friends. And ask yourself if you'd be okay with this then just treat him like any other friend. Men are so hard to understand sometimes that you really can't assume what they're thinking. There was this guy who I thought really liked me and it turned out he liked a friend of mine and was just trying to get her number from me so you don't know for sure.

Has he done anything inappropriate? If yes then maybe ask him to stop, but if not then just relax and make it clear you're not interested in him. Chances are he'll just get bored and leave you alone.
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Anonymous #1
#6
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(Original post by Anonymous)
You don't actually know he likes you remember. He may just want to be friends. And ask yourself if you'd be okay with this then just treat him like any other friend. Men are so hard to understand sometimes that you really can't assume what they're thinking. There was this guy who I thought really liked me and it turned out he liked a friend of mine and was just trying to get her number from me so you don't know for sure.

Has he done anything inappropriate? If yes then maybe ask him to stop, but if not then just relax and make it clear you're not interested in him. Chances are he'll just get bored and leave you alone.
At first I also thought he just wanted to be friends and so I treated him in a friendly way as I needed more friends anyway. Then he started to be a little bit flirty which rang alarm bells. I still wasn't 100% sure but I really didn't want to lead him on in case he did actually like me. I did that once accidently and got a guy obsessed with me, never again. He hasn't been inappropriate and I can tell he's a nice guy which is why I'm not blaming him for anything. For some reason, in my experience men find it really hard to take the hint lol. But that wasn't even the point, I just didn't know why I felt so weird around him. I know now though, thank you for the reply!
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Anonymous #1
#7
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(Original post by HousesInCork)
You're probably just feeling more self conscious because you know he likes you and is thus paying you specific unwanted attention. Perhaps you're also a bit anxious that he might try to initiate an uncomfortable situation, like a 1:1 convo or expressing his feelings directly.
Yeah that makes a lot of sense, I guess there isn't really anything I can do about it. Thank you!
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Anonymous #3
#8
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(Original post by Anonymous)
At first I also thought he just wanted to be friends and so I treated him in a friendly way as I needed more friends anyway. Then he started to be a little bit flirty which rang alarm bells. I still wasn't 100% sure but I really didn't want to lead him on in case he did actually like me. I did that once accidently and got a guy obsessed with me, never again. He hasn't been inappropriate and I can tell he's a nice guy which is why I'm not blaming him for anything. For some reason, in my experience men find it really hard to take the hint lol. But that wasn't even the point, I just didn't know why I felt so weird around him. I know now though, thank you for the reply!
Personally, I would just try to relax around him becuase it sounds like you are really overthinking this. You said yourself that he is a nice guy so just remember that and realise he probably doesn't want to make you feel self-conscious, and won't do anything inappropriate to make you feel uncomfortable. And I know it's easy to think all guys are jerks becuase of past experiences (I know I have lol) but they're really not. And some guys find it hard to be friendly around girls and are quite shy so it comes across as flirting (not saying you're wrong and he wasn't flirting but things aren't always as they appear). Chances are he's just being friendly so think about that whenever you see him. I don't know if that will help you feel less self-conscious but I hope it does!!
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Anonymous #3
#9
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#9
^ And I hope that doesn't come across as rude but it's just my opinion of the situation. I don't know all the facts so I might be totally wrong!!
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