My parents aren't that smart and it's dragging me down

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
You can call be out for sounding arrogant, disrespectful or like a d**k for saying this, but my parents aren't the brightest people and it frustrates me to be around them and I feel like it's prevented me from growing intellectually as much as I could have. I know I can't blame my parents solely and it's about what I can do to work with things the way they are to improve, but living with them can be so grating and I struggle to branch out and be around others who can help broaden my mind due to social anxiety and depression and I feel more behind than others.
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gtty123
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#2
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#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
You can call be out for sounding arrogant, disrespectful or like a d**k for saying this, but my parents aren't the brightest people and it frustrates me to be around them and I feel like it's prevented me from growing intellectually as much as I could have. I know I can't blame my parents solely and it's about what I can do to work with things the way they are to improve, but living with them can be so grating and I struggle to branch out and be around others who can help broaden my mind due to social anxiety and depression and I feel more behind than others.
I thought your parents weren't the intellectual people?
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Macie765
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#3
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#3
the only person to limit you is you. no one can stop you. you need to try and push yourself to be with other people even if it's a little step its better than no step
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0ptics
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#4
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(Original post by Anonymous)
You can call be out for sounding arrogant, disrespectful or like a d**k for saying this, but my parents aren't the brightest people and it frustrates me to be around them and I feel like it's prevented me from growing intellectually as much as I could have. I know I can't blame my parents solely and it's about what I can do to work with things the way they are to improve, but living with them can be so grating and I struggle to branch out and be around others who can help broaden my mind due to social anxiety and depression and I feel more behind than others.
Why exactly do you dislike the fact that your parents aren’t the brightest to be around? Is there an underlying reason or is it simply and only because they aren’t the brightest?

Just to let you know, your academical and intellectual skills are solely based on you and nobody will judge you on this regard. In fact, feel free to make a tally of all the people who are calling you stupid merely due to the fact that your parents aren’t the smartest.
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bruh15
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#5
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#5
I don't understand how them not being intelligent affects you. And in what way. How would it affect you academically if you're the one studying. If you mean in terms of general knowledge, I still don't get how their knowledge affects you, if you want to broaden your mind then you can do so by reading the news etc. It has nothing to do with them. You have to be a bit clearer with what you're saying.
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rosy_posy
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#6
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#6
(Original post by Anonymous)
You can call be out for sounding arrogant, disrespectful or like a d**k for saying this, but my parents aren't the brightest people and it frustrates me to be around them and I feel like it's prevented me from growing intellectually as much as I could have. I know I can't blame my parents solely and it's about what I can do to work with things the way they are to improve, but living with them can be so grating and I struggle to branch out and be around others who can help broaden my mind due to social anxiety and depression and I feel more behind than others.
In what way aren't your parents the "brightest people"? Did they not get many qualifications or is it more to do with their logic?
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Anonymous #2
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Some of the best people I have ever met are not the most intelligent. Judging just on intelligence feels quite elitist and you will miss out on a huge amount of incredible caring and hard working people (better qualities than a lot of really intelligent people)
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Anonymous #3
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#8
well same but only for my mother side. my father is too smart but my mother is just like… idk how to describe it but it’s bad.
For the people who don’t understand, parents could reflect their behaviors to their children. for example if they are unproductive all day, insecure, have no goals, lack communication skills, or don’t have a positive-smart mindset they will mirror it to them. I live with my mother most of the time as my father always at work. so sometimes it does affect me and I always try to stay aware of my behaviors not to be like hers. It’s difficult for anyone to understand but I totally get it. All you have to do is focus on yourself till you move out. also control your emotions not to be pissed off from them all the time. try to be patient.
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Anonymous #2
#9
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(Original post by Anonymous)
well same but only for my mother side. my father is too smart but my mother is just like… idk how to describe it but it’s bad.
For the people who don’t understand, parents could reflect their behaviors to their children. for example if they are unproductive all day, insecure, have no goals, lack communication skills, or don’t have a positive-smart mindset they will mirror it to them. I live with my mother most of the time as my father always at work. so sometimes it does affect me and I always try to stay aware of my behaviors not to be like hers. It’s difficult for anyone to understand but I totally get it. All you have to do is focus on yourself till you move out. also control your emotions not to be pissed off from them all the time. try to be patient.
I get that with the productivity, lack of communication etc but that does not neccisarily correlate to low intelligence
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Anonymous #1
#10
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(Original post by Anonymous)
well same but only for my mother side. my father is too smart but my mother is just like… idk how to describe it but it’s bad.
For the people who don’t understand, parents could reflect their behaviors to their children. for example if they are unproductive all day, insecure, have no goals, lack communication skills, or don’t have a positive-smart mindset they will mirror it to them. I live with my mother most of the time as my father always at work. so sometimes it does affect me and I always try to stay aware of my behaviors not to be like hers. It’s difficult for anyone to understand but I totally get it. All you have to do is focus on yourself till you move out. also control your emotions not to be pissed off from them all the time. try to be patient.
Exactly spot on, I just wish I can discuss things and connect with my parents with certain topics but they just go over their heads. I think yhis is one of the things that annoys me about this, not having common ground and feeling quite alienated, eg. with talking about politics or whatever, they don't really engage with any politics. Also just not wanting to pick up their habits
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by rosy_posy)
In what way aren't your parents the "brightest people"? Did they not get many qualifications or is it more to do with their logic?
Kind of just not having much intellectual value or interest, and I don't mean academic intelligence I mean every type of intelligence and sometimes maturity/life skills/ wisdom. They also don't help encourage me to excel in life, I know again that is only up to me but it would sure be nice to feel like my parents care about me progressing in life and have some guidance.
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Bazookaboobs
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#12
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#12
Wow.

Not sure how to respond to this... seems like you're blaming your poor parents for your lack of intelligence. Neither of my parents are educated, bless them but they gave me the best life they could and pushed me into doing the best in my education as I could ever dream of.

I have siblings reading medicine, engineering and computer science at prestigious universities. We did it thanks to them.
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cleveranimal56
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#13
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#13
(Original post by Anonymous)
Kind of just not having much intellectual value or interest, and I don't mean academic intelligence I mean every type of intelligence and sometimes maturity/life skills/ wisdom. They also don't help encourage me to excel in life, I know again that is only up to me but it would sure be nice to feel like my parents care about me progressing in life and have some guidance.
Bro, there is such a large amount of people that don’t have good english and aren’t the smartest, but their kids go on to academically flourish in varying fields. My parents aren’t the smartest either but I am still getting high grades and it’s because of how I choose to spend my time.
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Bazookaboobs
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(Original post by cleveranimal56)
Bro, there is such a large amount of people that don’t have good english and aren’t the smartest, but their kids go on to academically flourish in varying fields. My parents aren’t the smartest either but I am still getting high grades and it’s because of how I choose to spend my time.
Exactly this - my mum speaks broken English but tried her best for us.

We have to put effort into things too, our parents are made to do everything for us. OP is p*ssing me off, ngl. I don't like the victim act. He sounds very arrogant and venomous towards his parents.
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cleveranimal56
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#15
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(Original post by Bazookaboobs)
Exactly this - my mum speaks broken English but tried her best for us.

We have to put effort into things too, our parents are made to do everything for us. OP is p*ssing me off, ngl. I don't like the victim act. He sounds very arrogant and venomous towards his parents.
I agree. If anything, I want to show my parents that I can do well and give back to them via my own hard work. The fact that my parents can’t speak fluent english or understand what I was learning didn’t deter them from putting me into tuitions and buying the necessary textbooks. They helped me get into a grammar school and has pretty much helped me in every way.
Last edited by cleveranimal56; 1 month ago
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yehuhha
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#16
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#16
(Original post by Anonymous)
You can call be out for sounding arrogant, disrespectful or like a d**k for saying this, but my parents aren't the brightest people and it frustrates me to be around them and I feel like it's prevented me from growing intellectually as much as I could have. I know I can't blame my parents solely and it's about what I can do to work with things the way they are to improve, but living with them can be so grating and I struggle to branch out and be around others who can help broaden my mind due to social anxiety and depression and I feel more behind than others.
how does that even affect you?
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Anonymous #4
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#17
Speaking about them not having much “intellectual value”, makes you sound as if you base people’s worth entirely/mostly off how intelligent they are. Intelligence isn’t everything.

Whether your parents are intelligent or not should have no hold over your own intelligence. Sure it may mean they can’t help you with homework, or they may not understand what you’re passionate about, but at the end of the day that shouldn’t mean that you are frustrated when you’re around them. That’s a really weird and very elitist point of view.

It’s also worth mentioning that only you are in the way of your own “intellectual growth” as you put it. You’re parents can’t gain it for you, or hold you back.
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rosy_posy
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#18
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#18
(Original post by Anonymous)
Kind of just not having much intellectual value or interest, and I don't mean academic intelligence I mean every type of intelligence and sometimes maturity/life skills/ wisdom. They also don't help encourage me to excel in life, I know again that is only up to me but it would sure be nice to feel like my parents care about me progressing in life and have some guidance.
I see how them not encouraging you may affect your motivation levels, but many people on this thread saw your first post as you insulting your parents for not being as smart as you. I think the important thing here is that you have food, water, shelter and parents who don't abuse you.
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Anonymous #1
#19
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#19
(Original post by Anonymous)
well same but only for my mother side. my father is too smart but my mother is just like… idk how to describe it but it’s bad.
For the people who don’t understand, parents could reflect their behaviors to their children. for example if they are unproductive all day, insecure, have no goals, lack communication skills, or don’t have a positive-smart mindset they will mirror it to them. I live with my mother most of the time as my father always at work. so sometimes it does affect me and I always try to stay aware of my behaviors not to be like hers. It’s difficult for anyone to understand but I totally get it. All you have to do is focus on yourself till you move out. also control your emotions not to be pissed off from them all the time. try to be patient.
But you're very right, its about focusing on what you can do for yourself and reflect on emotions
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Anonymous #3
#20
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(Original post by Anonymous)
But you're very right, its about focusing on what you can do for yourself and reflect on emotions
PROSM
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