Year 12s: what will be the first way you research your future options? >>

applied for medicine but don't know if I want to do it anymore

yeah, the title basically. Applied like 3 weeks ago, but for the past 2 or so weeks I've been really doubting it. I don't even know exactly what it is, just a combination of everything I suppose.

It's not even that I don't...want...it. If that makes sense. I genuinely love human biology, and I've done far too much research for my own good. I think I've got a good grasp of what medical students study and what doctors do. I genuinely think I'd like the academic study, and I'd probably like the work of a doctor.

But there's so many things I like. I think like a lot of medics, and I mean this in the least arrogant way possible, I'm good at most things. And I enjoy most academic subjects. In my three years of sixth form I've flip flopped between literally 10 different subjects, and honestly I enjoyed them all. I settled on Bio, Chem, Maths so I could do medicine, but I think I could've definitely stuck with English Lit, Spanish and French. I also did physics and further maths at one point and could've probably continued with them.

Which leads me to my dilemma. I still kind of like the idea of medicine, but that's the problem, I like the IDEA. People so frequently push the whole "you need to be dedicated/love it/passion" etc. I've heard a lot of people on here say if you would enjoy something else then do that. I probably could continue with medicine, but I'm certainly not passionate or driven like so many people. I was, in the past. But at this point it's become a bit of a "yeah I guess I could be a doctor" I could push through. Which seems like a recipe for disaster. I don't know how articulate I'm being here but I hope my state of mind is coming across haha.

A few other things crossing my mind: I want to travel, like I really love it, and I want to do a lot in the future. I'm aware that this is certainly not impossible in medicine, you have annual leave like everyone else, and you can go part time, years out/F3/locums. Or even jump abroad to Australia. But it's also a very different timeline isn't it? I've always hated feeling trapped, and I think I would feel trapped by medical training. Graduate at 25, then you kind of have to stay for at least 2 more years, by that point you're 27 and are likely to stay for all of specialty training because of ties here, Then you're mid 30s and CCT , but at that point you've probably got a family. Idk it just feels like if you want to actually be a clinical doctor, you're not very mobile at all.

Then there's the fact you're also very mobile lol. If I'm honest I don't want to (be forced to) move around in training. I want to have some amount of choice in where I work.

Also constant exams and learning, again I'm not against. I love learning, but I don't like that you HAVE to pass certain exams if you want to progress. Although I'm aware this is not unique to medicine.

Also I like money, not afraid to say that. I'm not money-hungry so to speak, and I don't need to be a millionaire at all but I've been poor my whole life and I would like a fairly well paying job. Which medicine obviously is, after so much time, but I don't think you people are compensated fairly for your skills at all. And the starting for Juniors is ridiculous, mid 20s with more debt than any other graduates after 5-6 years of study. This is really not the biggest factor to me, but it seems to be top of the list of complaints I hear from doctors.

And lastly our wonderful NHS is collapsing because the government plain and simply doesn't care about doctors or funding the nhs. Fair enough I won't be working for the better part of a decade, life for doctors could get significantly better or worse, but it's not looking great. And it's not like the have a free market to jump to another hospital, with better pay and conditions, unless you're willing to uproot your life and move country.

so yeah, that's all my ramblings and thoughts down in one long post. I'm not really sure where to go from here. I've applied and it's too late to substitute my choices. Gap year is definitely on the table and might be the way. But I'm also already in my third year of sixth form so it would be nice to figure out what I'm doing with my life sooner rather than later. Could continue with medicine, I do love biology etc , and I loved my work experience and volunteering. But I seriously don't know if I'm dedicated enough. I also have no idea what else I'm gonna do because I've been set on this for a while and all my teachers/family are expecting it of me at this point. But I also kind of don't want to back out, because I have a habit of impulsivity and jumping in and out of things, then regretting.

Great TSRers, please advise. If you've made it to the end oft this excessively long post you deserve a medal.

Reply 1

Student5cience

You seem like a dedicated and passionate individual to me. 3 years of sixthform? Not everyone can stomach that. What other careers do you have in mind. I understand that what’s putting you off is the long and demanding route in medicine but have you thought about what it’s like to practice medicine, you mentioned you enjoyed your volunteering and work experience, maybe you should reflect on why you enjoyed it

Reply 2

will queens

honestly thank you so much, you've really talked me down a bit. kind of reminded me of how I really did want to do medicine up until recently, maybe it is just cold feet/imposter syndrome. idk what this site would do without you.

realistically, I couldn't change my options even if I wanted to as it's past the 2 weeks. I'm just gonna give this application cycle my all and go from there, maybe I'll get offers, maybe I won't. Maybe a gay year, maybe reapply, maybe not. I don't need to (and can't) make any decisions right now.

thank you!

Reply 3

will queens

Original post by Student5cience

thank you for this! I never even thought about it like that. I clearly do have passion for it or I wouldn't have repeated a year to change my subjects. I might just be getting cold feet.

Reply 4

Student5cience

@will queens I have imposter syndrome and I always have cold feet when it comes to anything academic. I’ve just got to remind myself why I’m here in the first place

Reply 5

TheMedicOwl

I feel the same way at times. I'm typing this from a deserted hospital corridor, which I'm sitting in because I can't face having to talk to people in the break room, with every bone aching. It's been a spectacularly awful shift and it makes me think I'm mad for even considering med. I feel like I never want to set foot in a hospital again. But I know, because it's happened before, that tomorrow I will feel different. Every choice comes with its regrets and what-ifs. If you picked another subject, you'd look wistfully at medicine. Persevere. I bet your mojo will come back when the interview invitations start to arrive.