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I want to move out for university..but strict parents & social anxiety

My whole life i was never allowed to do anything, like go out with my 1 friend, leave the house past 5pm etc or have social media until i was 16 which ultimately led me to have social anxiety, i struggle to keep conversations going and speaking out loud.

I kinda just want to change and move away from my family to go to university far away. But my parents wont allow me and theyre saying i can only go to my local one and stay at home. If i leave, id probs get disowned and i have no way to support myself if that happens.

idk what i should do, move away or stay at home, i dont want complicated drama and my parents to never talk to me again. And i dont know how i would make friends at uni? Any advice would be appreciated i feel so lost :smile:
hi there! as someone with an unhealthy relationship with their parents and is going to uni in sep, you need to go to a uni you love far away from their control.

uni gives you the chance to live in a new place without your family or any people from your hometown. you can buy your own food, organise your own nights out, and make friends that have the same interests and values as you.

i know you say you don't want the drama of being disowned but it is your parents that have and will cause this. if you don't leave, they will try to control you the rest of your life. they want you to stay close to home so that they can control you. getting away from your parents gives you the break you need and the chance to properly work through your childhood.

you can get a student maintenance loan depending on your parents' income and you can also pick up a job in uni. finances is the only reason i would advise against moving out into uni, but even then i'd say ignore uni for a year or two, get a full time job, and then when you go to uni apply as an independent/estranged student.

i know it is hugely complicated and emotional. if you need anything, you can shoot me a message.
Original post by pillowfields
hi there! as someone with an unhealthy relationship with their parents and is going to uni in sep, you need to go to a uni you love far away from their control.

uni gives you the chance to live in a new place without your family or any people from your hometown. you can buy your own food, organise your own nights out, and make friends that have the same interests and values as you.

i know you say you don't want the drama of being disowned but it is your parents that have and will cause this. if you don't leave, they will try to control you the rest of your life. they want you to stay close to home so that they can control you. getting away from your parents gives you the break you need and the chance to properly work through your childhood.

you can get a student maintenance loan depending on your parents' income and you can also pick up a job in uni. finances is the only reason i would advise against moving out into uni, but even then i'd say ignore uni for a year or two, get a full time job, and then when you go to uni apply as an independent/estranged student.

i know it is hugely complicated and emotional. if you need anything, you can shoot me a message.

is it ok if i text u privately?
Original post by simzahhhhhh
My whole life i was never allowed to do anything, like go out with my 1 friend, leave the house past 5pm etc or have social media until i was 16 which ultimately led me to have social anxiety, i struggle to keep conversations going and speaking out loud.

I kinda just want to change and move away from my family to go to university far away. But my parents wont allow me and theyre saying i can only go to my local one and stay at home. If i leave, id probs get disowned and i have no way to support myself if that happens.

idk what i should do, move away or stay at home, i dont want complicated drama and my parents to never talk to me again. And i dont know how i would make friends at uni? Any advice would be appreciated i feel so lost :smile:

honestly same im debating moving out for uni and cutting contact bc im tired of being controlleddd

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