Make it More Shopping-ey !!

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the bear
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#1
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#1
so 26th November is Bl*ck Fr*d*y this year

let us make fun of this synthetic greedfest with some hilarious punnage

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Reality Check Toki the Dumdum harrysbar The_Lonely_Goatherd Good bloke Muttley79 nulli tertius chazwomaqAndrew97 Plantagenet Crown Fullofsurprises LiberOfLondon ecolierlondonmyst Sammylou40GlazJoinedup uberteknikPhoenixfeather99AngryJellyfish laurawattwinterscomingBlue_Cow RedTwisttoonervoustotalk Deggs_14 HRobson_BMCSinnoh SaDe7RogerOxonAnonymous1502 DrewskiQuasaParacosm The Usherette™ lyer in hellfyreMidge Bang Udder OrderProducktiveOndeKarelinaGreyWolfTooDr CoxPhantom 1517Dan0101026Soapusername5264250FV75mqb2766cambioTobelstienCoolBroStereoKjekjeSkittishNappLaserquestAleshabecausethenightOberonflyLovelyFoxProxyBuckHowlsHalfeti RoseWoooordabsolutelysproutMoonboChoc fanGhostladyCoolestMacyAmeliaLyndseyROTLRsxgewSameeraClaudiaDaveoNeviBlackCatFlobroLaurenceAnonymous1502Guru JasonLego Men OnJoyfulGeekMarkovHardy_BtgHannaRufusSynergy~Medic WilVanessaCnightingalegendVersionsBecca216Mr WillyjellyRetreadicossummerberrychopinnocMesopotGolderzshortieTashFionaandDonkeymnotzetamfctinygirlBlueIndigoVioletTJ1997DaryaJoyAstraPhoenixRoseWannaCambioAsaYunoouser11235813cleanseBexKorrasmorrasajilemonadeteatreblebeefox houndbbyooserJolesJustaboutmeddadCute KawaiiImperatorFatinespinningtopjoey srpugglet HellllppppScarletMillionsSir Rutlandtimespentjackpotu_w_DSKEdacba_w_HALLOONMickeyM&SpharmerS&FProperladFFFMehvijRam RYeoAeshaMarkWise GTinyPizzahomecounterPStevensAmeliab2PRich PCkentReading MumKing LouiswaxerAzureWindChlaminmate4DopticsDentaldreamsjustvisitedSocraticNikkiBHM365nm12345Leafysealonestercote1ojhungrysalBraindraindjinnsterArtfultinyBenjiHedgey[ user=4749028]Joshwoods[/user]
Last edited by the bear; 1 week ago
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mnot
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#2
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#2
The sale of Glamorgan
The deals on the bus
Buy buy sailor
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Joinedup
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#3
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#3
Voucher tiger, hidden coupon
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the bear
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#4
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#4
(Original post by mnot)
The sale of Glamorgan
The deals on the bus
Buy buy sailor
:woo: you are at the front of the queue mnot :teehee:

the people of Sales are clutching their purses :pierre:

*https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sales,_Haute-Savoie

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Chers clients,
merci de ne pas faire sécher vos fromages sur les radiateurs des vestiaires.
Ils commencent à fondre et à attirer les mouches et ça. Bientôt,
les oiseaux volent pour se régaler des insectes.
Puis c'est le pandémonium alors que les oiseaux s'affrontent
et attaquent les rideaux avec leurs pieds pointus.
La semaine dernière, la grande Ghislaine m'a raconté qu'un dotterel
avait fait un whoopsie dans son café.
Pourquoi ne pas laisser vos fromages à la réception à votre arrivée ?
Big Fabienne dispose d'une armoire spéciale pour le séchage des produits à base de caillé.

Jean-Michel Théophile Brouillard

Sous-procureur adjoint des fromages et que

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Valued customers,
please do not dry your cheeses on the changing room radiators.
They start to melt and attract flies and that. Soon the birds fly in to feast on the insects.
Then it is pandemonium as the birds tussle with each other and attack the curtains with their pointy feet.
Last week big Ghislaine told me that a dotterel did a whoopsie in her coffee.
Why not leave your cheeses at reception upon arrival ?
Big Fabienne has a special cupboard for drying curd based products.

Jean-Michel Théophile Brouillard

Deputy Assistant Procurator of cheese and that
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the bear
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#5
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#5
(Original post by Joinedup)
Voucher tiger, hidden coupon
:woo: this is a real bargain Sir J !! :ahee:

have a medal:

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the bear
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#6
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#6
i must leave the shopfloor now

:wavey:

please do not start rioting

:bigsmile:
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The_Lonely_Goatherd
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#7
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#7
Supermarket Sooty and Sweep
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Dentaldreams
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#8
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#8
I’ve been a bag girl


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Not my best, sorry🙈
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BrainDrain
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#9
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#9
(Original post by the bear)
i must leave the shopfloor now

:wavey:

please do not start rioting

:bigsmile:
One armed man seen shopping in a second-hand shop
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nulli tertius
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#10
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#10
A January sale in a camping shop:-

Now ‘tis the winter of our discount tent
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ghostwalker
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#11
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#11
Troll-ey in the dungeon.

Aisle of the Blessed - for all your religious paraphernalia.

Mall of Kintyre.
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meddad
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#12
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#12
I'm going to the Pound shop for some Harry Potter books.... apparently only a Quidditch
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meddad
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#13
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#13
(Original post by the bear)
i must leave the shopfloor now

:wavey:
Exit through the Gift Shop please
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the bear
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#14
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#14
(Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
Supermarket Sooty and Sweep
:rave: good one T_L_G :girl:

i though you would have gone with.....

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I Queue, I Queue, I Queue, I Queue, I Queue.....


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the bear
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#15
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#15
(Original post by Dentaldreams)
I’ve been a bag girl


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Not my best, sorry🙈
:rave: maybe shopping is not your ermm bag ? :girl:

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the bear
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#16
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#16
(Original post by BrainDrain)
One armed man seen shopping in a second-hand shop
:woo: back of the net bag BD :congrats:

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the bear
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#17
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#17
(Original post by nulli tertius)
A January sale in a camping shop:-

Now ‘tis the winter of our discount tent
:woo: a fine piece of paranomasia Sir Nulli ! :yay:

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the bear
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#18
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#18
(Original post by ghostwalker)
Troll-ey in the dungeon.

Aisle of the Blessed - for all your religious paraphernalia.

Mall of Kintyre.
:woo: these will be snapped up quickly Sir Ghostie ! :yay:

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the people of Sales are experiencing a magnitude 5.1 mirthquake :yep:

*https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sales,_Haute-Savoie

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Messieurs,
veuillez ne pas jouer à des jeux insensés avec les dames de la réception
lorsqu'elles s'endorment après le déjeuner.
Essayer de leur mettre des olives dans la bouche
est à la fois irrespectueux et potentiellement dangereux.
Une olive pourrait facilement bloquer le pharynx,
provoquant l'asphyxie et la mort.
Big Mireille a une allergie sévère aux olives.
Parier sur le succès d'un film est contraire à la législation nationale
et locale sur les jeux de hasard.
Obtenez une vie que vous frottez.

Antoine de Noël de la Trompe d'Or

Sous-procureur adjoint à la sécurité du personnel et que


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Gentlemen,
please do not play foolish games with the reception ladies
when they fall asleep after lunch.
Trying to flick olives into their mouths is both disrespectful and potentially dangerous.
An olive could easily block the pharynx causing asphyxiation and death.
Big Mireille has a severe olive allergy.
Betting on the success of a flick is contrary to both
state and local gambling legislation.
Get a life you frog strokers.

Antoine de Noël de la Trompe d'Or

Deputy Assistant Procurator for staff safety and that
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the bear
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#19
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#19
(Original post by meddad)
I'm going to the Pound shop for some Harry Potter books.... apparently only a Quidditch

Exit through the Gift Shop please
:woo: now you're rowling Sir Meddad ! :ahee:

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meddad
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#20
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#20
(Original post by Dentaldreams)
I’ve been a bag girl


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Not my best, sorry🙈
I assume you will be offering a free scale and polish today.... after all, it is Plaque Friday 🤭
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