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Life is Hard...?

I have low self esteem and everyday in my mind theres always a voice telling me that I'm useless, your'e gonna be a loner forever, your'e never gonna be successful...so much more

I use to have friends, but they were never loyal to me and I would be loyal and kind towards them...at the end we just drifted apart.

I've only relied on myself...how can I get rid of such negativity. I always try and improve and be a better person but I'm always back to square one.

I am so grateful in life but at the end of the day I don't enjoy anything in my life...my birthday is coming up in 2 days and I couldn't care less.

Do you have any advice
Try to find your positives and try to see the good in every experience. Not everything that happens in life is good but there is always some good in it.
Those friends that left, maybe there is good in it, as you said they weren't loyal so you may be better off without them. You will find other friends just be patient.

You have strengths and positives, you are your own unique person, you have a purpose. Find yourself and grow <3 You don't need to achieve at the same rate as everyone else, you need to do the best YOU can do, not the best others can do.

I'm not going to use this as an opportunity to promote things and this topic can trigger people but if you believe in God, let your heart be at rest with Him. A fact of this world is that you will always be heartbroken by people and things around you, nothing in this world is fixed, friends can leave, wealth can go, family pass on or continue with their lives, lovers break up etc. But, if you believe in God, if you put your trust in Him, your heart in Him, then no one and nothing will ever be able to break that, God will never leave you. If you question whether God is real or not, if He is really there, if He has a greater purpose for you, ask, sincerely, 'God if you are real, if you want me to find my purpose, please guide me'
Stop feeling sorry for yourself. One song I recommend that encompasses all emotions in just one song has to be Dream Space by DVRST, Motion by DVRST and Close eyes by DVRST.
Reply 3
its time to get on self improvement. this is how I exactly felt like you, but once I got into habits to improve myself, my mindset completely changed. watch hamza ahmed or ICEcold JT on youtube (links at the end), to get started on self improvement.

First, you must start a habit tracker with these habits: (DON'T DO IT DIGITALLY, PUT IT ON PAPER ON YOUR WALL)
1. cold showers
2. exercise
3. meditation
4. gratitude journalling
5. meditation

don't worry if you cant complete it. you get way more value out of a habit tracker if u don't complete ur habits. don't tick if you don't do a habit stay true to urself.

when ur starting off, just doing a TINY bit of the habit, i.e. meditating for LITERALLY 1 second or LITERALLY doing 1 push up

why do I say this? it is all about PROGRESSIVE OVERLOAD

so for e.g. today u did 1 second of meditation or 1 word in ur journal. tomorrow, do 2 seconds or 2 words, then do 3 and so on...

BUILD THE HABITS BY DOING THE BARE MINIMUM AND TICK IT OFF THE HABIT TRACKER

its all about starting slow, to build the good habits that will eventually be the foundation for ur life.

in terms of friends and socials. this is what I experienced. once I got on self improvement, I didn't have any friends, except for one, who is in a different school and we don't talk much. it used to get to me, the loneliness so I thought people were the answer.

i was so wrong. i recently realised that I AM NOT ALONE OR LONELY. RATHER I AM IN SOLITUDE! be grateful for this phase and use it to improve urself!

rather, I began to focus on myself, and I promise you, that eventually, you will attract the same type of people as you, as after all, YOU ARE WHO YOU HANGOUT WITH

the next major thing I would highlight is the difference between two types of activities:
1. instant gratification
2. delayed gratification

which one is better? in the longer run, DELAYED GRATIFICATION IS BETTER

what do both of these words mean?

instant gratification is anything that can give you instant pleasure:
1. like masturbating to porn
2. drugs
3. procrastination
4. going to parties to get laid
5. drinking
6. a big one, social media

I'm sure u can think of more...

INSTANT GRATIFICATION IS EASY AND GIVES U PLEASURE INSTANTLY NOT GOOD FOR LONG TERM

on the other hand, delayed gratification:
1. cold showers
2. working out
3. meditation
4. journalling
5. doing work when u don't feel like it
6. reading

DELAYED GRATIFICATION IS HARD BUT THE RESULTS WILL DEFINITELY COMPOUND OVER TIME BETTER FOR LONG TERM

at this point in time, DO DELAYED GRATIFICATION ACTIVITIES! yes, we need both in our lives, but the latter is much better in almost any situation!

the grind is actually hard at first. but doing a bit each day and INCREASING HOW MUCH U DO EVERYDAY WILL BUILD IT INTO A HABIT!

once u get on self improvement, think of it in this way ur doing stuff only a few percent of ppl do for ur future, whilst the majority are doing instant gratification activities

remember UR ON UR GRIND, SO WORRY ONLY ABOUT YOU

yes, life is hard, but uve got the control to make small changes everyday. REMEMBER, A CHANGE IS STILL A CHANGE NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MAY BE!

u got this. AND I WOULD HIGHLY RECCOMEND TO WATCH THE YOUTUBE CHANNELS I DESCRIBED AT THE START AS THEY GIVE MUCH BETTER ADVICE these channels genuinely changed my mindset

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWsslCoN3b_wBaFVWK_ye_A Hamza

https://www.youtube.com/c/ICEcoldJT ICEColdJT

hope this helps you and good luck!
Well, it's not exactly easy...
Reply 5
Original post by iArcanic
its time to get on self improvement. this is how I exactly felt like you, but once I got into habits to improve myself, my mindset completely changed. watch hamza ahmed or ICEcold JT on youtube (links at the end), to get started on self improvement.

First, you must start a habit tracker with these habits: (DON'T DO IT DIGITALLY, PUT IT ON PAPER ON YOUR WALL)
1. cold showers
2. exercise
3. meditation
4. gratitude journalling
5. meditation

don't worry if you cant complete it. you get way more value out of a habit tracker if u don't complete ur habits. don't tick if you don't do a habit stay true to urself.

when ur starting off, just doing a TINY bit of the habit, i.e. meditating for LITERALLY 1 second or LITERALLY doing 1 push up

why do I say this? it is all about PROGRESSIVE OVERLOAD

so for e.g. today u did 1 second of meditation or 1 word in ur journal. tomorrow, do 2 seconds or 2 words, then do 3 and so on...

BUILD THE HABITS BY DOING THE BARE MINIMUM AND TICK IT OFF THE HABIT TRACKER

its all about starting slow, to build the good habits that will eventually be the foundation for ur life.

in terms of friends and socials. this is what I experienced. once I got on self improvement, I didn't have any friends, except for one, who is in a different school and we don't talk much. it used to get to me, the loneliness so I thought people were the answer.

i was so wrong. i recently realised that I AM NOT ALONE OR LONELY. RATHER I AM IN SOLITUDE! be grateful for this phase and use it to improve urself!

rather, I began to focus on myself, and I promise you, that eventually, you will attract the same type of people as you, as after all, YOU ARE WHO YOU HANGOUT WITH

the next major thing I would highlight is the difference between two types of activities:
1. instant gratification
2. delayed gratification

which one is better? in the longer run, DELAYED GRATIFICATION IS BETTER

what do both of these words mean?

instant gratification is anything that can give you instant pleasure:
1. like masturbating to porn
2. drugs
3. procrastination
4. going to parties to get laid
5. drinking
6. a big one, social media

I'm sure u can think of more...

INSTANT GRATIFICATION IS EASY AND GIVES U PLEASURE INSTANTLY NOT GOOD FOR LONG TERM

on the other hand, delayed gratification:
1. cold showers
2. working out
3. meditation
4. journalling
5. doing work when u don't feel like it
6. reading

DELAYED GRATIFICATION IS HARD BUT THE RESULTS WILL DEFINITELY COMPOUND OVER TIME BETTER FOR LONG TERM

at this point in time, DO DELAYED GRATIFICATION ACTIVITIES! yes, we need both in our lives, but the latter is much better in almost any situation!

the grind is actually hard at first. but doing a bit each day and INCREASING HOW MUCH U DO EVERYDAY WILL BUILD IT INTO A HABIT!

once u get on self improvement, think of it in this way ur doing stuff only a few percent of ppl do for ur future, whilst the majority are doing instant gratification activities

remember UR ON UR GRIND, SO WORRY ONLY ABOUT YOU

yes, life is hard, but uve got the control to make small changes everyday. REMEMBER, A CHANGE IS STILL A CHANGE NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MAY BE!

u got this. AND I WOULD HIGHLY RECCOMEND TO WATCH THE YOUTUBE CHANNELS I DESCRIBED AT THE START AS THEY GIVE MUCH BETTER ADVICE these channels genuinely changed my mindset

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWsslCoN3b_wBaFVWK_ye_A Hamza

https://www.youtube.com/c/ICEcoldJT ICEColdJT

hope this helps you and good luck!

Thank you

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