My mum

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
She’s always been on my case ever since I was younger. I was never allowed to do anything until recently but that’s only because I realised I could just suffer the consequences later and not ruin my life because of her. Recently my dad passed away and she got a lot less stricter with my social life but a lot more stricter with my education. I currently am a uni student and I’m doing pretty well but she always says I’m a failure. She has been calling me a failure ever since GCSEs because I messed those up due to other reasons. But ever since then I’ve managed to get my **** together and have gotten really high grades in A Levels. But even before I got all of those grades she kept saying I was a failure and was never worth it. She always questions why I’m her daughter and how I’m in my room all day and I’m useless. I have really bad depression ever since GCSE days and she knows how badly those days affected me and I started to get a lot better. But now I’m in uni she has started going off on a different level than before. I’m falling really back into my old depression habits and pretty much live in my room. I have loads of access to my uni work on my phone and laptop and that’s how I’ve managed to stay on top of it because I can’t get myself to go library. But she calls me so many names and says she sees no future in me. I’m tired of all this verbal abuse. It’s literally my education and she manages to control it. I wasn’t even able to go to the uni I wanted because She wouldn’t let me live outside of home or commute. I just don’t understand what she wants from me and I’m sick and tired of all the **** she says. I just wanna live my life peacefully but she won’t leave me alone. There’s always a problem with her.
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londonmyst
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#2
Report 1 month ago
#2
I understand some of how you are feeling.
I grew up in a controlling and toxic household, surrounded by unreasonable people who constantly imposed their bizarre rules on me.

It is your life and your future, don't let your mother ruin either.
You need to put your own ambitions, happiness and future first.
Your mother is not going to change her attitude towards you or her tactics.
The vicious circle of constant negativity, frequent insults and demands will only be broken when you choose to break it- by removing all opportunities for her to impose upon you on a daily basis.
Do you have any savings or regular monthly income to finance alternative accomodation and basic living expenses?
Any friends with a spare bed that you could stay with short term?
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Anonymous #2
#3
Report 1 month ago
#3
(Original post by Anonymous)
She’s always been on my case ever since I was younger. I was never allowed to do anything until recently but that’s only because I realised I could just suffer the consequences later and not ruin my life because of her. Recently my dad passed away and she got a lot less stricter with my social life but a lot more stricter with my education. I currently am a uni student and I’m doing pretty well but she always says I’m a failure. She has been calling me a failure ever since GCSEs because I messed those up due to other reasons. But ever since then I’ve managed to get my **** together and have gotten really high grades in A Levels. But even before I got all of those grades she kept saying I was a failure and was never worth it. She always questions why I’m her daughter and how I’m in my room all day and I’m useless. I have really bad depression ever since GCSE days and she knows how badly those days affected me and I started to get a lot better. But now I’m in uni she has started going off on a different level than before. I’m falling really back into my old depression habits and pretty much live in my room. I have loads of access to my uni work on my phone and laptop and that’s how I’ve managed to stay on top of it because I can’t get myself to go library. But she calls me so many names and says she sees no future in me. I’m tired of all this verbal abuse. It’s literally my education and she manages to control it. I wasn’t even able to go to the uni I wanted because She wouldn’t let me live outside of home or commute. I just don’t understand what she wants from me and I’m sick and tired of all the **** she says. I just wanna live my life peacefully but she won’t leave me alone. There’s always a problem with her.
I feel you, I kinda go through the same thing but because of that I'm kinda struggling with my grades, there's a lot of pressure on me haha. But as I said, due to the situation it makes harder for me to perform so it just ends up being a horrible loop and a vicious cycle. Let's hope we both get outta this in the end
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Anonymous #1
#4
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#4
(Original post by londonmyst)
I understand some of how you are feeling.
I grew up in a controlling and toxic household, surrounded by unreasonable people who constantly imposed their bizarre rules on me.

It is your life and your future, don't let your mother ruin either.
You need to put your own ambitions, happiness and future first.
Your mother is not going to change her attitude towards you or her tactics.
The vicious circle of constant negativity, frequent insults and demands will only be broken when you choose to break it- by removing all opportunities for her to impose upon you on a daily basis.
Do you have any savings or regular monthly income to finance alternative accomodation and basic living expenses?
Any friends with a spare bed that you could stay with short term?
Moving out isn’t even an option but yeah it’s an awful cycle and I know once I’m done with uni, there’s gonna be another problem she will nitpick. She’s the sole cause of most of the bad things in my life happening yet plays victim whenever I call her out and she always thinks she’s right. No one else is right but only her even when she’s so painfully wrong.
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Anonymous #1
#5
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#5
(Original post by Anonymous)
Moving out isn’t even an option but yeah it’s an awful cycle and I know once I’m done with uni, there’s gonna be another problem she will nitpick. She’s the sole cause of most of the bad things in my life happening yet plays victim whenever I call her out and she always thinks she’s right. No one else is right but only her even when she’s so painfully wrong.
(Original post by Anonymous)
I feel you, I kinda go through the same thing but because of that I'm kinda struggling with my grades, there's a lot of pressure on me haha. But as I said, due to the situation it makes harder for me to perform so it just ends up being a horrible loop and a vicious cycle. Let's hope we both get outta this in the end
Yes hopefully we do. No one deserves a life like this. If it gets any worse I’m gonna have to force myself to move out next year. But it will come with some grave consequences I don’t think I’m ready for.
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