23 female with no friends and issues with family. Feeling crap.

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
Not to sure where to start with this one, apologies if this is just me supergluing out my life story but I’ve being feeling very down recently and don’t really have anyone to talk to.

Firstly. I’d like to start by saying I’ve been struggling with social anxiety since a young age, I have had a small friendship group of girls who I met in school and had been lucky enough to keep friends with them up until recent months, but anyone else I have ever made friends with I’ve easily cut of after I’ve realised they’re not for me and if I’m honest there’s been a few people.

I’ve found over the last few years I haven’t had many reliable friendships, a lot of my friends have been unresponsive and just not very present, as we grew older I realised it was impossible to make plans with people, so I’d speak and see them less and less, everyone in my group went off to uni and made new friends apart from me, but recently I cut ties with a close friend of 17+ years, this is because I would always message her and try to make plans with her but she never reciprocated, I felt somewhat like I was not worth anything to her, she’s come home and see everyone but never made time for me, until she had none else to talk to, I would bring it up to her and she’d tell me “oh I’m sorry I’ve just had lentils health issues lately” and I’d try and comfort her and if forgive her and then it would happen again, the thing is I also have em tap health issues yet I still would find time to check up on her and to try and arrange plans but she would not do that same, and if I’m honest it made me feel horrible about myself so recently I decided to cut all ties with her!

To top of all of I’ve also have had alot of family issues lately, I come from a very toxic family and lockdown was a big struggle, I really wanted to move out but I’ve been savings to leave in 2022 to go travelling (was meant to go in 2021) my family have always favourited my brother especially my aunts and grandma, and although I’ve knew they’ve favourited him it’s become very apparent recently after he split with his girlfriend and they’ve gone out their way everyday for the last month to comfort him, on top of all of this my aunt called me a horrible jealous ***** about 4 months ago and I drunkenly yelled back at her in-front of my grandparents and now I’m pretty much known as the horrible selfish one in the family - on top of that she hasn’t even apologised and the thought of her makes me angry. She’s a horriabke person and does this to my other sisters too yet they’re always to quick to move on from her spiteful tongue, which I will never understand! (Also for context all I did before she called me a ***** was comment on how beautiful my cousin looked and out of nowhere my aunts drunk started on me) so of course I’ve pretty much cut them from my life too.

All I want to do is get away but I’m in a relationship and I love my boyfriend so much the thought of us ending is extremely upsetting but yet, recently I’ve been feeling weird like indifferent, I’ve been thinking a lot about certain things in our relationship which if I am honest been pissing me off, like *** he never defends me, how he lets me pay for everything and never treats me to anything and we have to half everything and finally how he may not want the same things in the further. -

I think maybe I’m going through something I’m not sure, be all I can say is I’m feeling isolated, lonely, and extremely down with no one to talk to, and I’m not sure what to do, I just want to run away form my family and from my hometown and never see anyone again if I’m honest.

I’m just feeling so crappy lately, I have no one to talk to and all I want to do is get away. I’m in a job I hate with no friends, and a family who just bring me down all the time, I know maybe I am the problem and especially because I’ve felt lonely for so long, I struggle to talk to people and to let people in, im also extremely self conscious - any honest advice will be appreciated
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Anonymous #2
#2
Report 1 month ago
#2
Hi, I'm 22 about to turn 23 and I'm in the EXACT same situation... the only advice I have is to focus on yourself... start looking for jobs you know you'll enjoy. save up, get a place of your own ... if you don't drive, you get that licence!!! Driving is a form of freedom in itself ... start loving yourself. Honestly that's the only way to go. I've started doing that just this year and I can honestly say I feel great. No one has time for people who don't have time for you. CHOOSE YOU AND ONLY YOU.

I hope that helps!
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Anonymous #3
#3
Report 1 month ago
#3
(Original post by Anonymous)
Not to sure where to start with this one, apologies if this is just me supergluing out my life story but I’ve being feeling very down recently and don’t really have anyone to talk to.

Firstly. I’d like to start by saying I’ve been struggling with social anxiety since a young age, I have had a small friendship group of girls who I met in school and had been lucky enough to keep friends with them up until recent months, but anyone else I have ever made friends with I’ve easily cut of after I’ve realised they’re not for me and if I’m honest there’s been a few people.

I’ve found over the last few years I haven’t had many reliable friendships, a lot of my friends have been unresponsive and just not very present, as we grew older I realised it was impossible to make plans with people, so I’d speak and see them less and less, everyone in my group went off to uni and made new friends apart from me, but recently I cut ties with a close friend of 17+ years, this is because I would always message her and try to make plans with her but she never reciprocated, I felt somewhat like I was not worth anything to her, she’s come home and see everyone but never made time for me, until she had none else to talk to, I would bring it up to her and she’d tell me “oh I’m sorry I’ve just had lentils health issues lately” and I’d try and comfort her and if forgive her and then it would happen again, the thing is I also have em tap health issues yet I still would find time to check up on her and to try and arrange plans but she would not do that same, and if I’m honest it made me feel horrible about myself so recently I decided to cut all ties with her!

To top of all of I’ve also have had alot of family issues lately, I come from a very toxic family and lockdown was a big struggle, I really wanted to move out but I’ve been savings to leave in 2022 to go travelling (was meant to go in 2021) my family have always favourited my brother especially my aunts and grandma, and although I’ve knew they’ve favourited him it’s become very apparent recently after he split with his girlfriend and they’ve gone out their way everyday for the last month to comfort him, on top of all of this my aunt called me a horrible jealous ***** about 4 months ago and I drunkenly yelled back at her in-front of my grandparents and now I’m pretty much known as the horrible selfish one in the family - on top of that she hasn’t even apologised and the thought of her makes me angry. She’s a horriabke person and does this to my other sisters too yet they’re always to quick to move on from her spiteful tongue, which I will never understand! (Also for context all I did before she called me a ***** was comment on how beautiful my cousin looked and out of nowhere my aunts drunk started on me) so of course I’ve pretty much cut them from my life too.

All I want to do is get away but I’m in a relationship and I love my boyfriend so much the thought of us ending is extremely upsetting but yet, recently I’ve been feeling weird like indifferent, I’ve been thinking a lot about certain things in our relationship which if I am honest been pissing me off, like *** he never defends me, how he lets me pay for everything and never treats me to anything and we have to half everything and finally how he may not want the same things in the further. -

I think maybe I’m going through something I’m not sure, be all I can say is I’m feeling isolated, lonely, and extremely down with no one to talk to, and I’m not sure what to do, I just want to run away form my family and from my hometown and never see anyone again if I’m honest.

I’m just feeling so crappy lately, I have no one to talk to and all I want to do is get away. I’m in a job I hate with no friends, and a family who just bring me down all the time, I know maybe I am the problem and especially because I’ve felt lonely for so long, I struggle to talk to people and to let people in, im also extremely self conscious - any honest advice will be appreciated
Hey you are not the problem but sometimes some people just need to be away from your life so that you can meet other people who will love you cherish you appreciate you for who you are
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Anonymous #1
#4
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#4
(Original post by Anonymous)
Hey you are not the problem but sometimes some people just need to be away from your life so that you can meet other people who will love you cherish you appreciate you for who you are
Hey, thank you for this comment, I literally teared up
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Anonymous #1
#5
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#5
(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi, I'm 22 about to turn 23 and I'm in the EXACT same situation... the only advice I have is to focus on yourself... start looking for jobs you know you'll enjoy. save up, get a place of your own ... if you don't drive, you get that licence!!! Driving is a form of freedom in itself ... start loving yourself. Honestly that's the only way to go. I've started doing that just this year and I can honestly say I feel great. No one has time for people who don't have time for you. CHOOSE YOU AND ONLY YOU.

I hope that helps!
Thank you so much, I will take on everything you have told me! 💜
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isobelsnotes
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#6
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#6
It took me until 24 and my 4th attempt at college, having moved out of an abusive household to find a group of friends who truly valued me for me. My previous 'best friend' was exactly the same as yours, being the last resort friend does terrible things to your self esteem. You are 100% better without them, that is no friend.
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Anonymous #4
#7
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#7
I lost all my high school friends bar one due to social anxiety, bad panic attacks and an eating disorder issue. I felt at my lowest and like the loneliest person alive. When I started recovering is when I started letting people in, and that’s when I started making friends which was basically only really a couple of years ago where I went to study at a college where there was no one I knew. Although high school was one of the lowest points of my life it really did show me that the people I had around me weren’t reliable and sometimes it’s good to lose those people. You do you sis, you are amazing and you don’t deserve to feel like crap (because you are such a lovely person!)
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Bang Outta Order
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#8
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#8
Meh. Just know, there's always someone worse off.
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username5585736
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#9
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#9
I’m 26, also life is difficult or not always nice over here on my end too.

Someone said in a post above to learn to drive and to just start working on yourself. i second that advice
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Anonymous #1
#10
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#10
(Original post by Bang Outta Order)
Meh. Just know, there's always someone worse off.
Yep, I know there is always someone worse off, but that doesn’t make anyone else’s issues less important
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bennydfrg
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#11
Report 1 month ago
#11
(Original post by Anonymous)
Not to sure where to start with this one, apologies if this is just me supergluing out my life story but I’ve being feeling very down recently and don’t really have anyone to talk to.

Firstly. I’d like to start by saying I’ve been struggling with social anxiety since a young age, I have had a small friendship group of girls who I met in school and had been lucky enough to keep friends with them up until recent months, but anyone else I have ever made friends with I’ve easily cut of after I’ve realised they’re not for me and if I’m honest there’s been a few people.

I’ve found over the last few years I haven’t had many reliable friendships, a lot of my friends have been unresponsive and just not very present, as we grew older I realised it was impossible to make plans with people, so I’d speak and see them less and less, everyone in my group went off to uni and made new friends apart from me, but recently I cut ties with a close friend of 17+ years, this is because I would always message her and try to make plans with her but she never reciprocated, I felt somewhat like I was not worth anything to her, she’s come home and see everyone but never made time for me, until she had none else to talk to, I would bring it up to her and she’d tell me “oh I’m sorry I’ve just had lentils health issues lately” and I’d try and comfort her and if forgive her and then it would happen again, the thing is I also have em tap health issues yet I still would find time to check up on her and to try and arrange plans but she would not do that same, and if I’m honest it made me feel horrible about myself so recently I decided to cut all ties with her!

To top of all of I’ve also have had alot of family issues lately, I come from a very toxic family and lockdown was a big struggle, I really wanted to move out but I’ve been savings to leave in 2022 to go travelling (was meant to go in 2021) my family have always favourited my brother especially my aunts and grandma, and although I’ve knew they’ve favourited him it’s become very apparent recently after he split with his girlfriend and they’ve gone out their way everyday for the last month to comfort him, on top of all of this my aunt called me a horrible jealous ***** about 4 months ago and I drunkenly yelled back at her in-front of my grandparents and now I’m pretty much known as the horrible selfish one in the family - on top of that she hasn’t even apologised and the thought of her makes me angry. She’s a horriabke person and does this to my other sisters too yet they’re always to quick to move on from her spiteful tongue, which I will never understand! (Also for context all I did before she called me a ***** was comment on how beautiful my cousin looked and out of nowhere my aunts drunk started on me) so of course I’ve pretty much cut them from my life too.

All I want to do is get away but I’m in a relationship and I love my boyfriend so much the thought of us ending is extremely upsetting but yet, recently I’ve been feeling weird like indifferent, I’ve been thinking a lot about certain things in our relationship which if I am honest been pissing me off, like *** he never defends me, how he lets me pay for everything and never treats me to anything and we have to half everything and finally how he may not want the same things in the further. -

I think maybe I’m going through something I’m not sure, be all I can say is I’m feeling isolated, lonely, and extremely down with no one to talk to, and I’m not sure what to do, I just want to run away form my family and from my hometown and never see anyone again if I’m honest.

I’m just feeling so crappy lately, I have no one to talk to and all I want to do is get away. I’m in a job I hate with no friends, and a family who just bring me down all the time, I know maybe I am the problem and especially because I’ve felt lonely for so long, I struggle to talk to people and to let people in, im also extremely self conscious - any honest advice will be appreciated
Hi 21 here been suffering with social anxiety and depressiion for years now and feel the same always here if you need someone to talk to
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isobelsnotes
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#12
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#12
(Original post by Bang Outta Order)
Meh. Just know, there's always someone worse off.
living up to the username i see
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Anonymous #1
#13
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#13
(Original post by bennydfrg)
Hi 21 here been suffering with social anxiety and depressiion for years now and feel the same always here if you need someone to talk to
Thank you, I really appreciate that 😊
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Anonymous #5
#14
Report 1 month ago
#14
(Original post by Anonymous)
Not to sure where to start with this one, apologies if this is just me supergluing out my life story but I’ve being feeling very down recently and don’t really have anyone to talk to.

Firstly. I’d like to start by saying I’ve been struggling with social anxiety since a young age, I have had a small friendship group of girls who I met in school and had been lucky enough to keep friends with them up until recent months, but anyone else I have ever made friends with I’ve easily cut of after I’ve realised they’re not for me and if I’m honest there’s been a few people.

I’ve found over the last few years I haven’t had many reliable friendships, a lot of my friends have been unresponsive and just not very present, as we grew older I realised it was impossible to make plans with people, so I’d speak and see them less and less, everyone in my group went off to uni and made new friends apart from me, but recently I cut ties with a close friend of 17+ years, this is because I would always message her and try to make plans with her but she never reciprocated, I felt somewhat like I was not worth anything to her, she’s come home and see everyone but never made time for me, until she had none else to talk to, I would bring it up to her and she’d tell me “oh I’m sorry I’ve just had lentils health issues lately” and I’d try and comfort her and if forgive her and then it would happen again, the thing is I also have em tap health issues yet I still would find time to check up on her and to try and arrange plans but she would not do that same, and if I’m honest it made me feel horrible about myself so recently I decided to cut all ties with her!

To top of all of I’ve also have had alot of family issues lately, I come from a very toxic family and lockdown was a big struggle, I really wanted to move out but I’ve been savings to leave in 2022 to go travelling (was meant to go in 2021) my family have always favourited my brother especially my aunts and grandma, and although I’ve knew they’ve favourited him it’s become very apparent recently after he split with his girlfriend and they’ve gone out their way everyday for the last month to comfort him, on top of all of this my aunt called me a horrible jealous ***** about 4 months ago and I drunkenly yelled back at her in-front of my grandparents and now I’m pretty much known as the horrible selfish one in the family - on top of that she hasn’t even apologised and the thought of her makes me angry. She’s a horriabke person and does this to my other sisters too yet they’re always to quick to move on from her spiteful tongue, which I will never understand! (Also for context all I did before she called me a ***** was comment on how beautiful my cousin looked and out of nowhere my aunts drunk started on me) so of course I’ve pretty much cut them from my life too.

All I want to do is get away but I’m in a relationship and I love my boyfriend so much the thought of us ending is extremely upsetting but yet, recently I’ve been feeling weird like indifferent, I’ve been thinking a lot about certain things in our relationship which if I am honest been pissing me off, like *** he never defends me, how he lets me pay for everything and never treats me to anything and we have to half everything and finally how he may not want the same things in the further. -

I think maybe I’m going through something I’m not sure, be all I can say is I’m feeling isolated, lonely, and extremely down with no one to talk to, and I’m not sure what to do, I just want to run away form my family and from my hometown and never see anyone again if I’m honest.

I’m just feeling so crappy lately, I have no one to talk to and all I want to do is get away. I’m in a job I hate with no friends, and a family who just bring me down all the time, I know maybe I am the problem and especially because I’ve felt lonely for so long, I struggle to talk to people and to let people in, im also extremely self conscious - any honest advice will be appreciated
About the friendship, tbh your friendship had no obligation to agree with your plans, considering they are probably you're age or around, they are older probably working and trying to get bigger career goals they probably had no time to do these 'plans'. When you are 18 age plus yes you might go out to the pub but that's probably the age you, save money, get a career sorted etc and basically you go out less because you realise you're an adult, you need to save money, get a career, save for your future, save to move out and stuff like that. Going out doesn't get you anywhere so tbh good on your friends for not obliging to your plans.

When I 16 I used to go out with mates all the time but I turned 17-18 and just started focusing on saving and my career it's more important. I realised I'm less of a teenager and more of adult. 23 as well that's well into your adult years, to me at that age going out would be way gone apart from the odd drink at the pub maybe every 6 months if that. At 23 would you even have time to go out more than every few months? Then money as well, it's expensive as well considering you have your mortgage/rent, bills to pay for, it's not free, money doesn't go on trees. So getting rid of your friends just because they don't oblige to your plans is a bit unreasonable tbh. I guess now you understand

Anyway good look and remember if you find this harsh then tough unfortunately it's all facts 👍
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bennydfrg
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#15
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#15
(Original post by Anonymous)
Thank you, I really appreciate that 😊
Anytime!! I write songs about what i go through they seem to help
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Anonymous #1
#16
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#16
(Original post by Anonymous)
About the friendship, tbh your friendship had no obligation to agree with your plans, considering they are probably you're age or around, they are older probably working and trying to get bigger career goals they probably had no time to do these 'plans'. When you are 18 age plus yes you might go out to the pub but that's probably the age you, save money, get a career sorted etc and basically you go out less because you realise you're an adult, you need to save money, get a career, save for your future, save to move out and stuff like that. Going out doesn't get you anywhere so tbh good on your friends for not obliging to your plans.

When I 16 I used to go out with mates all the time but I turned 17-18 and just started focusing on saving and my career it's more important. I realised I'm less of a teenager and more of adult. 23 as well that's well into your adult years, to me at that age going out would be way gone apart from the odd drink at the pub maybe every 6 months if that. At 23 would you even have time to go out more than every few months? Then money as well, it's expensive as well considering you have your mortgage/rent, bills to pay for, it's not free, money doesn't go on trees. So getting rid of your friends just because they don't oblige to your plans is a bit unreasonable tbh. I guess now you understand

Anyway good look and remember if you find this harsh then tough unfortunately it's all facts 👍
The girl I’m referring to is out every weekend drinking with other people. The issue I have is that she’s makes plans with everyone, puts effort into seeing them yet never does the same with me, but even when she is feeling down she constantly expects me to be by her side (which i am) and never does the same for me or checks on my mental health yet she’ll get mad when I don’t constantly message her! even though I’ve tried for years messaging her, trying to arrange to meet yet every single weekend she’s out with other people - so no, she’s not avoiding seeing people to work on career choices she is just avoiding seeing me.
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Anonymous #1
#17
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#17
(Original post by Anonymous)
The girl I’m referring to is out every weekend drinking with other people. The issue I have is that she’s makes plans with everyone, puts effort into seeing them yet never does the same with me, but even when she is feeling down she constantly expects me to be by her side (which i am) and never does the same for me or checks on my mental health yet she’ll get mad when I don’t constantly message her! even though I’ve tried for years messaging her, trying to arrange to meet yet every single weekend she’s out with other people - so no, she’s not avoiding seeing people to work on career choices she is just avoiding seeing me.
Also I take it from you post you’re clearly younger than 23? - 23 really isn’t that old lol, believe or not at 23 we still enjoy socialising on weekends…
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