struggling in the bedroom department

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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 1 week ago
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Hi. Me and my boyfriend are have been officially together for about 9 months now. Before we went official I'd been sleeping with him for about 6 months but I wasn't ready for a relationship at that point so he waited on me.
The sex at the start was really good as that's all we were. For the past 4 months of our relationship my boyfriend has been struggling to stay hard, it started as just this he would go soft during intercourse and get frustrated. Only recently has he stopped trying. I try with him every couple months but he always just says not tonight or we'll do it tomorrow.
I've Brought it up to him and he's said his doctors think his testosterone levels are low and want him to go for tests but he doesn't follow through with this.
Me being an insecure girl blames myself and thinks I'm not good enough. Has anyone had a problem similar to this and can give me advice. He treats me like a princess and is everything I want in a guy, but if we can't solve the bedroom issue I know we can't live like this forever
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BurstingBubbles
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Report 1 week ago
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi. Me and my boyfriend are have been officially together for about 9 months now. Before we went official I'd been sleeping with him for about 6 months but I wasn't ready for a relationship at that point so he waited on me.
The sex at the start was really good as that's all we were. For the past 4 months of our relationship my boyfriend has been struggling to stay hard, it started as just this he would go soft during intercourse and get frustrated. Only recently has he stopped trying. I try with him every couple months but he always just says not tonight or we'll do it tomorrow.
I've Brought it up to him and he's said his doctors think his testosterone levels are low and want him to go for tests but he doesn't follow through with this.
Me being an insecure girl blames myself and thinks I'm not good enough. Has anyone had a problem similar to this and can give me advice. He treats me like a princess and is everything I want in a guy, but if we can't solve the bedroom issue I know we can't live like this forever
Moved to the Sexual Health forum

It sounds like you've already done the right thing by talking about it and advising that he seeks medical advice. However he's probably embarrassed/anxious by it and doesn't want to follow it up as then he would have to accept that he has a problem in this area. I would raise it again and say that you're concerned and how it's impacting on you and the relationship. Sex isn't the priority, in many relationships, but if you don't feel that this is manageable long term then you need to raise it again and be honest. If he does not do anything about it and it's something that is a deciding factor in the relationship, then you may have to end the relationship?

Have you spoken to him about what might turn him on etc. and see if trying something new could help? It may not since the levels are low, but worth a try?

I really hope that he does go back to the doctor to follow it up, since it's impacting so much.
Last edited by BurstingBubbles; 1 week ago
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