Is anyone else getting bad vibes (asian / muslim perspective)

Last year i suffered the misfortune of being rejected by over 2000 women on dating apps, as well as by women irl (usually family friends girls and girls via rishta aunties)

1 of these women was somrone whose parents / grandparents were interested but kept lying about the girp before ultmately saying she wasnnt interested as there was a big age gap.

Today, 1 of the crooked rishta aunties phones and says the girl's grandmother is interested. Personally I dont trust either of them as so many parents are interested in my but the girls reject straight away.

Is it worth potentially meeting uo with her or leave it?

Reply 1

username5794123

Original post by Anonymous

Today, 1 of the crooked rishta aunties phones and says the girl's grandmother is interested.

Classic TSR post. :rolleyes:

Reply 2

londonmyst

Always trust your gut instinct and listen to what your common sense is telling you. :smile:

A lot of desis & some asian religious traditionalists who are keen to see their young relatives/ a close friend's relative married soon either lie about the person's willingness and compatibility or have delusionally convinced themselves that they can persuade/bully/force to obtain cooperation.
Particularly when there is either a centuries of arranged marriages as a family tradition or a professional matchmaker/introducer involved.

A lot of women have ambitions that do not involve marriage or having biological children and know that their older relatives will not approve so stay quiet and focus on their studies/careers until they have enough money to move far away.
Many women more have very long or specific dealbreakers that they will never tell their parents or any religious traditionalists about for fear of a very aggressive reaction.
So they quietly reject all approaches made on behalf of guys/from guys that they wouldn't give the time of day to and try do everything they can to avoid attracting any further such approaches.
They feel that they can't take the risk of being too specific about the reasons why they are not interested or yelling "NO" in the face of their parents/aunties/family friends/community leaders.
Good luck!

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by londonmyst

Always trust your gut instinct and listen to what your common sense is telling you. :smile:

Cheers for the advice londonmyst. You always seem to give great advice for my posts on here

Reply 4

Doctor demore

Original post by Anonymous

never force things. move on

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

Original post by Doctor demore

never force things. move on

I agree

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Right, so an update on what happened. My mum and aunt essentially dragged me into visiting the girl. Whilst her family was OK, my bad vibes were justified.

The girl was very boring / didnt seem to connect on an emotional or mental level and seemed the sort who wanted to live like how rich people live on reality tv without realising anything about the real world. Also she looked completely different physically to how she did IRL. She prettymuch asked me the usual questions but she seemed absolutely shellshocked with the answers she gave when I told her about what I do and hobbies and interests. to top it off, she more or less confirmed she is only interested in marriage because her grandad has ill health (which is a massive red flag). Prettymuch decided there and then I wasnt interested but didnt let them know till a few days later. my mum agreed on the journey back the girl wouldnt cope with realities of marriage / life as she was very sheltered / extremely spoilt and was very vain and lazy. I hope they find someone on their own terms mind you but safe to say, I made the right decision I feel.