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caught strong feelings for someone at my workplace who I havent known long

I met him a month ago and we worked together for 3 weeks. We had long shifts together and got close. We became best friends and I knew we were not compatible because of his lifestyle. He did things that I didn't personally agree with on a religious level. We are of different faiths too and we both knew it. We became close and he opened up to and so did I slightly, we both knew we were more than friends. Everyone at our workplace saw how we got on and that it was just us who were best friends there out of all our co workers. He would sometimes retreat on his own which made me feel a bit wierd but then when we would talk and work it would be good. My feelings got deeper and when he wouldn't come to work for a couple of days I would feel low. He then got fired which honestly hit me hard because I knew I wouldnt see him again. We both knew we liked each other whether it was me who liked him more or the other way round. Going into work was very hard not seeing him there, it felt like I was going through a breakup. He's like the male version of me, we met organically and became best friends and clicked right away, I know he hasn't felt this kind of connection with anyone either as he was comfortable with me. He did compliment me once but i dont think I am his type as the girls on his social media look very different. He hasnt messaged me or contacted me and its been some time. When he informed me about him getting fired I made it clear that I would miss him etc but he didnt say anything of that sort to me, he was talking about being mad at the company but nothing directly to me. I know its hard for men to open up and be direct with their feelings so I didnt read too much into it. I am just trying to get over him but no one seems to understand why I caught feelings so fast. I spent everyday with him at work and we had very long shifts. I never vibed with a guy aas well as I did with him. Is how Im acting normal or is it unhealthy?
Reply 1
Would you mind me asking (if you know) - what did he get fired for?
Reply 2
Original post by Muttly
Would you mind me asking (if you know) - what did he get fired for?

management just didnt like him for some reason. Made excuses just to fire him. And I left the job a week later due to bad management
Reply 3
It sounds like you two were two souls who were thrown together in a time and space and had a brief 'connect' on a good level. You had the beginnings of something but it was never to be. He was constrained by his own religious beliefs and that clearly was going to cause issues further down the line. He was unwilling to change his lifestyle - If two people love each other enough and are prepared to withstand the warfare involved in offending religious beliefs from either side of the divide your relationship might have stood a chance. Make no bones men and women have been killed by those who should have protected and loved them purely for this loosely termed and misguided 'honour' (fear of offending others or being disapproved of) Clearly he wasn't willing to change anything so there was your final curtain. Treasure the good times of your brief but happy liaison and move on to bigger better things. This one for sure was never going to go any further. Your feelings are very normal. You are still living the vision of how things might have been if the relationship carried on with the reality of your loss. Try to divert your focus onto life going forward, a new job perhaps, new adventures.
Reply 4
Original post by Muttly
It sounds like you two were two souls who were thrown together in a time and space and had a brief 'connect' on a good level. You had the beginnings of something but it was never to be. He was constrained by his own religious beliefs and that clearly was going to cause issues further down the line. He was unwilling to change his lifestyle - If two people love each other enough and are prepared to withstand the warfare involved in offending religious beliefs from either side of the divide your relationship might have stood a chance. Make no bones men and women have been killed by those who should have protected and loved them purely for this loosely termed and misguided 'honour' (fear of offending others or being disapproved of) Clearly he wasn't willing to change anything so there was your final curtain. Treasure the good times of your brief but happy liaison and move on to bigger better things. This one for sure was never going to go any further. Your feelings are very normal. You are still living the vision of how things might have been if the relationship carried on with the reality of your loss. Try to divert your focus onto life going forward, a new job perhaps, new adventures.

Yes I agree with this too, I think it was just a brief connection that wasnt meant to go any further and maybe I wasn't his usual type so he wouldnt be willing to leave his old lifestyle. I will have to find a new distraction like you said. Thanks for your reply :smile:

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