Does anyone feel like they've lost themselves

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Anonymous #1
#1
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#1
When you think back to high school or college, the mindset you had and the goals and ambitions do you feel like you've let yourself down?
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tinyperson
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#2
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#2
not often
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black tea
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#3
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#3
Yes and no.
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username5794123
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#4
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#4
Dunno. While I could argue that I lost myself, I could also argue that this is who I’m meant to be…
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ROTL94 2
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#5
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#5
No, in many ways I have exceeded my epectations and if I did feel the way you describle, that would just be Beelzebub trying to bring me down, so I'd ignore it and carry on as usual.
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Angel in the sky
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#6
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#6
Lost a lot of very close people and good friends but not myself
Last edited by Angel in the sky; 3 months ago
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wifd149
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#7
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#7
Always (so far), unfortunately. On the other hand, I am a tad bit happier now?
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Honey57
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#8
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#8
Well I’ve definitely not made my past self disappointed. I do wish I had gotten help sooner with my ocd though and in that way I do feel like I lost my original self and who I was.
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londonmyst
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#9
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#9
No.
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Anonymous #1
#10
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#10
I feel as though I would be disappointed but I'm not sure that's because I set unrealistic expectations that has caused me to make bad decisions that I now regret
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asif007
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#11
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#11
Everybody has their ups and downs. High school and sixth form college went very well for me, I made some lifelong friends and I got to discover what I was good at and what I enjoyed. But I ended up with grades much lower than I was capable of. I managed to get into the course I wanted a year later, but that turned out awfully when I was deceived and set up for failure. I left early, cut a lot of dead weight former uni friends out of my life, picked myself up, moved to another university and started over again from scratch. And I'm so glad I did. I'm now more focused than I've ever been before, despite starting the process with a bad hand. But had I not taken the hard road, I never would have been in the fortunate position I'm in now.

My point is that even if things are not going so well right now, hard work and determination can turn it around. There will be times when you feel like giving up, things are not worth it, you don't want to carry on etc. But those are only temporary. Things could be going perfectly for a long time but everything could be undone in a matter of hours, sometimes when you least expect it. Your job is to soldier on, dust yourself off and carry on pursuing whatever it is that you want. If somebody tells you that you can't do something, you show them how it's done and steamroll right over them. That's exactly what I'm doing right now. Treat small victories as big confidence boosts, such as passing exams and moving on. Do your best to build your confidence back after you run into setbacks - they happen to all of us. Get knocked down 9 times but get up 10.
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SupposedlyIronic
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#12
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#12
Completely
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Nightligh
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#13
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#13
All the time but it’s life you know we going to have bad times and good times in life we can’t change the past if we wanted to .
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PinkMobilePhone
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#14
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#14
Past me wouldn't know what to make of present me at all.
Past me can keep her opinions to herself - she hasn't walked in my shoes. One day she'll understand.
Last edited by PinkMobilePhone; 3 months ago
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yeet_21
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#15
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#15
at least in my experience during education you've always got a goal to aim for; like a degree, a grade, an internship etc. this gives you a purpose and maybe even a fire in your belly
once you graduate, there isn't a goal anymore by default. you have to come up with that yourself maybe it's retiring by 40 or becoming a ceo or making enough money to buy a house. without one you sort of lose meaning and purpose, there is a lack of drive and motivation and i think thats why people get lost.

also when you're a teenager heck even final year at uni you've lived in a bubble entire and yet to experienced real life. so you develop lofty expectations. just because you can doesn't mean you will. so people end up getting a reality check which is tough to take
Last edited by yeet_21; 3 months ago
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Anonymous #1
#16
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#16
(Original post by yeet_21)
at least in my experience during education you've always got a goal to aim for; like a degree, a grade, an internship etc. this gives you a purpose and maybe even a fire in your belly
once you graduate, there isn't a goal anymore by default. you have to come up with that yourself maybe it's retiring by 40 or becoming a ceo or making enough money to buy a house. without one you sort of lose meaning and purpose, there is a lack of drive and motivation and i think thats why people get lost.

also when you're a teenager heck even final year at uni you've lived in a bubble entire and yet to experienced real life. so you develop lofty expectations. just because you can doesn't mean you will. so people end up getting a reality check which is tough to take
I agree with that. Do you feel you are being put into the societal hierarchy as you reach your 20's, when I see how certain careers are perceived and how your university/degree puts you into a category of how valuable you are to society it makes me rethink the decisions I made
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