Are there any girls that can look past social awkwardness?

Watch this thread
Anonymous113
Badges: 1
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#1
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#1
I went to an all boys school for 6 years before uni. because of this, my ability to talk to women is non existent. I always end up leaving the convo on an awkward note, i cant flirt to save my life, and ive been told i am boring by many girls. I tried to ask my crush out, but ofc i ****ed that up hard. My self confidence is through the floor because i think i have no chance with women. Its not like im insecure about how i look, im 6 foot 3 and ive been told im attractive. But as soon as i start talking to a girl, my mind goes blank and i run out of things to say. My anxiety goes through the roof and i start studdeing. I dont know what to do at this point, i just have to accept that this is who i am. I just really want to know if there is someone out there who can look past this social barrier
0
reply
xamirahx
Badges: 6
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#2
Report 3 months ago
#2
Hey,

I think being socially awkward is endearing to a point but it would also depend on other personality traits if I liked the guy. Maybe put yourself out there more with others who have similar interests and hobbies to you if you feel comfortable. Practice makes progess. But being yourself is the most important!
3
reply
Crazed cat lady
Badges: 12
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#3
Report 3 months ago
#3
A little shyness or a bit of awkwardness can be quite endearing. However, when someone is really socially awkward it can be excruciating because such awkwardness is infectious. It is difficult to look beyond that when someone can’t hold a conversation.

Awkwardness can be overcome through exposure. Be social and you’ll get bet later at it. Talk to women not with the intention of chatting them up but simply to have a conversation with them. Over time, you’ll find talking to the opposite sex becomes easier.
3
reply
baloneygirl
Badges: 9
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#4
Report 3 months ago
#4
i agree with comments above, a bit of awkwardness is totally fine so don't stress if you fumble a bit at the beginning - it's totally normal when you're just getting to know someone and they won't care - especially if they're the right gal for you. plus, they will be feeling shy too! just try to build your confidence throughout the conversation so the awkwardness isn't totally crippling and you can get your personality to shine through (((:
Last edited by baloneygirl; 3 months ago
0
reply
Chicken.M.
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#5
Report 3 months ago
#5
Need to value yourself more and change your attitude. The girls are the ones that should be nervous since you're the dog's *******s. That's how i see it.
0
reply
Cote1
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#6
Report 3 months ago
#6
Yes.
0
reply
Ice_poseidon_Cx
Badges: 2
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#7
Report 3 months ago
#7
If a girl truly likes you she will want you for who you are. Don't change for anyone just be true to yourself. If girls don't like you then its your loss. Hope this helps
0
reply
tsparktae
Badges: 5
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#8
Report 3 months ago
#8
(Original post by Anonymous113)
I went to an all boys school for 6 years before uni. because of this, my ability to talk to women is non existent. I always end up leaving the convo on an awkward note, i cant flirt to save my life, and ive been told i am boring by many girls. I tried to ask my crush out, but ofc i ****ed that up hard. My self confidence is through the floor because i think i have no chance with women. Its not like im insecure about how i look, im 6 foot 3 and ive been told im attractive. But as soon as i start talking to a girl, my mind goes blank and i run out of things to say. My anxiety goes through the roof and i start studdeing. I dont know what to do at this point, i just have to accept that this is who i am. I just really want to know if there is someone out there who can look past this social barrier
I can definitely look past it. I actually like shy and smart guys more than I do any other. If girls say you're boring you might need to spice up the conversation maybe say something to make them laugh. If you ask someone out you need to get to know them first. Say hi to them before asking them out. Or get a friend to say you have a crush on them.

You do have a chance with women. Another thing could be height and they might think you're taken and might be intimidated if you're good looking. Don't worry about it you have plenty of time to find a girlfriend. That does not matter to me and maybe you need to find someone with your interests. Do small favours for a girl and they will start to connect with you. Awkwardness is really not that bad if you know how to change it.
1
reply
bendan88
Badges: 7
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#9
Report 3 months ago
#9
(Original post by Anonymous113)
I went to an all boys school for 6 years before uni. because of this, my ability to talk to women is non existent. I always end up leaving the convo on an awkward note, i cant flirt to save my life, and ive been told i am boring by many girls. I tried to ask my crush out, but ofc i ****ed that up hard. My self confidence is through the floor because i think i have no chance with women. Its not like im insecure about how i look, im 6 foot 3 and ive been told im attractive. But as soon as i start talking to a girl, my mind goes blank and i run out of things to say. My anxiety goes through the roof and i start studdeing. I dont know what to do at this point, i just have to accept that this is who i am. I just really want to know if there is someone out there who can look past this social barrier
You sound like me when I was at uni (6'3", told I was attractive, also told I was boring by girls). I'd suggest you try to put yourself in situations where you're talking to girls for a reason other than attraction - like a job, volunteering, or a hiking group for example. When you are talking, focus on asking them questions so that they are doing most of the talking. Be open and honest about yourself.
0
reply
yuraa
Badges: 3
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#10
Report 3 months ago
#10
(Original post by Anonymous113)
I went to an all boys school for 6 years before uni. because of this, my ability to talk to women is non existent. I always end up leaving the convo on an awkward note, i cant flirt to save my life, and ive been told i am boring by many girls. I tried to ask my crush out, but ofc i ****ed that up hard. My self confidence is through the floor because i think i have no chance with women. Its not like im insecure about how i look, im 6 foot 3 and ive been told im attractive. But as soon as i start talking to a girl, my mind goes blank and i run out of things to say. My anxiety goes through the roof and i start studdeing. I dont know what to do at this point, i just have to accept that this is who i am. I just really want to know if there is someone out there who can look past this social barrier
hell yeah there is!
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#11
Report 3 months ago
#11
yes, it's is easy to look past the social awkwardness. but you just need to meet people as friends and then once you get comfortable then take it further if you want.
0
reply
markbron215
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#12
Report 3 months ago
#12
(Original post by Anonymous113)
I went to an all boys school for 6 years before uni. because of this, my ability to talk to women is non existent. I always end up leaving the convo on an awkward note, i cant flirt to save my life, and ive been told i am boring by many girls. I tried to ask my crush out, but ofc i ****ed that up hard. My self confidence is through the floor because i think i have no chance with women. Its not like im insecure about how i look, im 6 foot 3 and ive been told im attractive. But as soon as i start talking to a girl, my mind goes blank and i run out of things to say. My anxiety goes through the roof and i start studdeing. I dont know what to do at this point, i just have to accept that this is who i am. I just really want to know if there is someone out there who can look past this social barrier
No they won't. They're looking for 6 foot, douchebags with fat wallets and nice cars. The fact that you're 6'3 means that you're already in the top 20% of the population, so that's good. They are also looking for someone who has exceptional social skills, can make them laugh or cry and they like when they have men do things for them. Having social awkwardness means that you don't know how to talk to people and can't do things for them. Being 6'3 and attractive is not good enough. Maybe try cold approaches. Try 1000 times until it works. Welcome to the world of an average guy. Let me tell you three main things you need to succeed as a man:

a) Money
b) Being physically attractive (i,e over 6 foot and having a nice six pack).
c) Exceptional social skills.

If you don't have all three of those things, good luck trying to find a girl. Girls will not give a **** about you unless you meet this criteria. Good luck.
0
reply
H8Courtship217
Badges: 9
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#13
Report 3 months ago
#13
sometimes it makes me mad that guys, men, are the only gender that need to get this issue resolved
0
reply
ran-dumb
Badges: 19
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#14
Report 3 months ago
#14
If you're attractive that's halfway there already, and awkwardness is something you can change so you'll be absolutely fine. I think everyone else said lots of helpful things already but just keep at it and you'll be swimming in girls in no time
0
reply
markbron215
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#15
Report 3 months ago
#15
(Original post by H8Courtship217)
sometimes it makes me mad that guys, men, are the only gender that need to get this issue resolved
Welcome to real life. Unfortunately, if a girl has social awkwardness she can still be 10/10 attractive and everyone will be kissing her feet. However if you are a guy and you have social awkwardness you are seen as a psychopath and a sociopath and no one will care or want to talk to you.
0
reply
Anonymous #2
#16
Report 3 months ago
#16
(Original post by Anonymous113)
I went to an all boys school for 6 years before uni. because of this, my ability to talk to women is non existent. I always end up leaving the convo on an awkward note, i cant flirt to save my life, and ive been told i am boring by many girls. I tried to ask my crush out, but ofc i ****ed that up hard. My self confidence is through the floor because i think i have no chance with women. Its not like im insecure about how i look, im 6 foot 3 and ive been told im attractive. But as soon as i start talking to a girl, my mind goes blank and i run out of things to say. My anxiety goes through the roof and i start studdeing. I dont know what to do at this point, i just have to accept that this is who i am. I just really want to know if there is someone out there who can look past this social barrier
As long as youre not a school shooter youre all good
0
reply
markbron215
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#17
Report 3 months ago
#17
(Original post by Anonymous)
As long as youre not a school shooter youre all good
See what I mean people? This is what I was talking about.
1
reply
NonIndigenous
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#18
Report 3 months ago
#18
My social awkwardness when talking to any people, more often stems from whether or not I feel the conversation/interaction is or isn't a waste of my time.

If I genuinely like someone, then I feel a lot less awkward around them. It doesn't even matter if they feel the same way yet. But if I'm forcing a conversation with someone where it just isn't working, and I have other things to do... then nope. I'm a bad actor, and it shows. I am most awkward when someone wants to talk to me, but I don't want to talk to them or even be there in that moment. Worst case is when I'm already visibly busy, for example working on my laptop in some public place, and then some random old person starts talking to me about their grandchildren and won't stop for a whole hour (this actually happened).

Like, if I see it going somewhere... then I'm ok. I thought that perhaps the slightly different perspective might be useful. Like, if my life is on track... and if I'm doing something or talking to someone with a purpose or an ambition and with a clear conscience (that isn't ill-intentioned)... then there is very little/no awkwardness. It works very well.
Last edited by NonIndigenous; 3 months ago
0
reply
Anonymous #2
#19
Report 3 months ago
#19
(Original post by markbron215)
See what I mean people? This is what I was talking about.
Sorry, bit of a dumb joke.
Honestly If this is your first time around girls then you will liekly find it hard to talk to them because other guys around you will have years on you. You just need to work on your confidence and try talking to girls who you are not interested in dating, build some friendships with girls then progress to speaking to your crush.
0
reply
markbron215
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#20
Report 3 months ago
#20
(Original post by Anonymous)
Sorry, bit of a dumb joke.
Honestly If this is your first time around girls then you will liekly find it hard to talk to them because other guys around you will have years on you. You just need to work on your confidence and try talking to girls who you are not interested in dating, build some friendships with girls then progress to speaking to your crush.
I wasn't the one asking for advice. It was the OP, 'Anonymous113', so tell him that. I have a different opinion. I think that if you don't meet standards of physical attractiveness, you lack social skills and you are not financially stable or independent, you're screwed and no girl will ever give you the time of the day. Maybe you think different because you're still in high school and you have crushes and stuff, but when you grow older and you become an adult, you will understand that life is very cruel. Also, sometimes you can't improve your social skills if you are socially awkward by default, for example if you have a mental health condition that prevents you from forming meaning relationships with people. For example, social anxiety and certain forms of autism.
Last edited by markbron215; 3 months ago
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Have you done work experience at school/college?

Yes (140)
43.89%
Not yet, but I will soon (55)
17.24%
No (124)
38.87%

Watched Threads

View All