Been attacked for having preferences

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#1
I made a post regarding a delicate situation. I know this girl. She likes me. I’m not attracted to her physically ( she’s beautiful but is underweight ). I also like her personality and wanted to ask her out in a friendly way in order to have a clearer idea if i’m interested or not.

I simply wrote “if she wants to change her body, i’d gladly help her” I didn’t even said it is something she has to do.

People started going crazy.

I then tried to reply to the comments. Most of comments were personal insults. Anyway, i replied saying “we all have preferences. This doesn’t make us *******s.”

Also, it’s not like “you’re not like this, so it’s a no”.

But it’s like “you’re not like this, but i don’t care about it, cause you’ve got other good sides”.

I guess all other girls and guys fall in love with the personality alone, and don’t need even a bit of physical attraction. So short, bald or ugly dudes have exactly the same chances of an handsome tall man.
Come on.
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Chicken.M.
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#2
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#2
Best not to give a reason you're unattracted to people lol. It just comes off as an insult. And you don't need a reason to be unattracted to someone either so theres no need to explain if anyone asks.
Last edited by Chicken.M.; 3 months ago
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Slx.24
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#3
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#3
People are sensitive af. Welcome to 2022 bro... get triggered over everything ☠

Maybe you could've worded it better but still lol.

(Original post by Anonymous)
I made a post regarding a delicate situation. I know this girl. She likes me. I’m not attracted to her physically ( she’s beautiful but is underweight ). I also like her personality and wanted to ask her out in a friendly way in order to have a clearer idea if i’m interested or not.

I simply wrote “if she wants to change her body, i’d gladly help her” I didn’t even said it is something she has to do.

People started going crazy.

I then tried to reply to the comments. Most of comments were personal insults. Anyway, i replied saying “we all have preferences. This doesn’t make us *******s.”

Also, it’s not like “you’re not like this, so it’s a no”.

But it’s like “you’re not like this, but i don’t care about it, cause you’ve got other good sides”.

I guess all other girls and guys fall in love with the personality alone, and don’t need even a bit of physical attraction. So short, bald or ugly dudes have exactly the same chances of an handsome tall man.
Come on.
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Slx.24
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#4
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#4
(Original post by Chicken.M.)
Best not to give a reason you're unattracted to people lol. It just comes off as an insult. And you don't need a reason to be unattracted to someone either so theres no need to explain if anyone asks.
That is also very true ☠☠
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Anonymous #2
#5
Report 3 months ago
#5
Very true, we all have preferences, but the way you phrased it sounds absolutely horrible. You could’ve just said you aren’t physically attracted to her. The way you phrased it isn’t good at all. I think you’ve missed the point of why people are mad at you
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Anonymous #1
#6
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#6
(Original post by Anonymous)
Very true, we all have preferences, but the way you phrased it sounds absolutely horrible. You could’ve just said you aren’t physically attracted to her. The way you phrased it isn’t good at all. I think you’ve missed the point of why people are mad at you
i don’t get how people can get mad to something like that. if i didn’t put “underweight”, the situation would be completely different. Isn’t that weird??
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Anonymous #1
#7
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#7
(Original post by Chicken.M.)
Best not to give a reason you're unattracted to people lol. It just comes off as an insult. And you don't need a reason to be unattracted to someone either so theres no need to explain if anyone asks.
ok but how come people get offended so easily. I didn’t say all underweight people suck.
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Mesopotamian.
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#8
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#8
(Original post by Anonymous)
ok but how come people get offended so easily.
The answer is in post #3 of this thread.
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ROTL94 2
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#9
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#9
I don't understand why you even needed to say that.
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Anonymous #1
#10
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#10
(Original post by ROTL94 2)
I don't understand why you even needed to say that.
to give context…
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sufys
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#11
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#11
(Original post by Anonymous)
I made a post regarding a delicate situation. I know this girl. She likes me. I’m not attracted to her physically ( she’s beautiful but is underweight ). I also like her personality and wanted to ask her out in a friendly way in order to have a clearer idea if i’m interested or not.

I simply wrote “if she wants to change her body, i’d gladly help her” I didn’t even said it is something she has to do.

People started going crazy.

I then tried to reply to the comments. Most of comments were personal insults. Anyway, i replied saying “we all have preferences. This doesn’t make us *******s.”

Also, it’s not like “you’re not like this, so it’s a no”.

But it’s like “you’re not like this, but i don’t care about it, cause you’ve got other good sides”.

I guess all other girls and guys fall in love with the personality alone, and don’t need even a bit of physical attraction. So short, bald or ugly dudes have exactly the same chances of an handsome tall man.
Come on.
Never give reasons as to why you aren't attracted to someone. The only thing it will do is offend them.

Also, you can be be bald and handsome :mad:.
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ROTL94 2
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#12
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#12
(Original post by Anonymous)
to give context…
I mean, it just seems like a stupid thing to say, especially on a public website, people think these things sure, but they often have the good sense to keep it to themselves.
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tedibare
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#13
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#13
(Original post by Slx.24)
People are sensitive af. Welcome to 2022 bro... get triggered over everything ☠

Maybe you could've worded it better but still lol.
Gosh don’t get me started.. literally anything I post someone starts crying over it
Last edited by tedibare; 3 months ago
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Slx.24
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#14
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#14
(Original post by tedibare)
Gosh don’t get me started.. literally anything I post someone starts crying over it
We should make a thread on the most pathetic thing someones come at you for 😂😂😂
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Admit-One
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#15
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#15
I haven’t read the other thread, but from your summation it wasn’t your ‘preference’ that people may have taken issue with. Rather the suggestion that the girl’s body type needed fixing or correcting in order to be attractive to you.

Everyone has preferences and dealbreakers. Not everyone says that they hypothetically imagine someone else is unhappy and that you’d step in to help with that. It seems like an unnecessary comment on your part and I’m not surprised some people felt the need to raise it.

Unlikely to attract criticism: I find this person’s personality attractive, but physically they don’t do anything for me. Anyone been through the same and have any advice?

Likely to attract criticism: I find this person’s personality attractive, but physically they don’t do anything for me. AITA for asking them out anyway with the suggestion that they might want to change to please me?
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tedibare
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#16
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#16
(Original post by Slx.24)
We should make a thread on the most pathetic thing someones come at you for 😂😂😂
Right 🤣
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Anonymous #1
#17
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#17
(Original post by Trinculo)
Frankly, you're an idiot. Why didn't you just go out with her and take her down Five Guys and put some weight on her - problem solved.
you’re not ok man.
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sufys
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#18
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#18
(Original post by Anonymous)
you’re not ok man.
It's a joke lol, relax.
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Trinculo
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#19
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#19
(Original post by Anonymous)
you’re not ok man.
No srsly, I don't see the problem. She's interesting and by OP's own measure "beautiful". So she's a bit skinny - so what.
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skylark2
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#20
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#20
I suspect the issue is more "I'll help her to change her body to suit my tastes better" than "she's underweight".

If you have no physical attraction to her, don't ask her out. If you'd be more attracted to her if she was less skinny, fair enough. This is not something you should tell her, ever, and her weight is not something you should be putting pressure on her to change about herself, no, not even if you say it's okay if she decides not to.
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